The Adventures of Bella and Human Boy
by M-Doggy
Summary: How will both Bella and Edward being human affect their relationship? What happens when a disaster is thrown their way?will they still love each other? please review.1st long story i wrote please be nice.
1. Chapter 1

**Story Notes:**

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The characters and plot are the property of **Stephenie Meyer**. No money is being made from this work. No copyright infringement is intended.

This is only my six fanfic, so I hope you enjoy it. Harsh criticism is wicked awesome.

**Author's Chapter Notes:**

If you have minute, I'd really appreciate it if you would review. And I know, this first chapter will be slow, but stick with me here. It'll get better. I hope.

I utterly despise Forks, Washington.

Abhor, detest, loathe, execrate. If it somehow pertains or is synonymous with the word _hate_, I've felt it towards this town. The small mass of about 3,000 people is nestled onto the coast of Washington, and onto the spot that it seems the very heavens pour down every day.

So wouldn't it seem strange that I find myself in that town, sent here by none other than myself?

But my mother's happiness is important to me. Had I stayed comfortable and warm in Phoenix, she would be miserable. Never being able to travel with her husband Phil, she would rarely see him. And who am I to make her suffer like that?

So because of my unwillingness to let my mother feel so lonely and miserable, I'm being dragged along by a girl with an over-eager smile and huge clusters of curls on her head.

". . . You'll just love her, I know you will. She has the cutest shoes, so if guys get to know each other, you can borrow them maybe. Oh, and you should know that . . ." she babbled, carrying on a conversation I had only heard part of. What was this talkative girl's name? Jane, Janice, Jordana . . . It would probably be rude to ask again. I'm not exactly sure of what the etiquette standards are here in Forks.

The line for lunch was quite long. At least it gave me a chance to analyze the new faces around me. When I first arrived here, I was afraid of criticism. For someone who had lived in The Valley of the Sun, I was abnormally pale. My skin was a translucent ivory. Along with the whiteness of my skin, my hair wasn't even a sun-bleached blond, and my looks in general weren't attractive. I was the brown-eyed brown-haired girl that most didn't notice. Luckily, there were many others whose skin was the same shade as mine. But among those who shared the same looks as mine, there were others who were exponentially more beautiful. At a table in the middle of the room was a beautiful blond girl with hair that shone in the fluorescent light like gold.

"That's Lauren," the girl pointed out. Jessica! That was her name!

As I got my bottle of lemonade and an apple, I felt quite happy about remembering Jessica's name and learning someone else's. Jessica led me to a table and stopped to say, "Everyone, this is Bella. Bella, this is Lauren," She pointed to the beautiful blond. "Mike," She gestured to a boy with a childish face and blond hair. "Angela," A girl with brown hair a kind smile. "Tyler," Yet another smiling boy. "And Edward."

I kept my eyes down, barely glancing at the people se had introduced, and murmured, "Hi, everyone." Jessica sat between Lauren and Mike, leaving me a spot at the end of the table.

When I sat down, I heard someone say, "Hi. I'm Tyler."

I stuck out my hand for him to shake. "I'm Bella. It's a pleasure to meet you."

"So where are you from?" he asked.

"Phoenix. How about you?"

He took a large bite of a sandwich, and then answered, "I've been here all of my life. So if you're from Phoenix, this must be quite the change, eh?"

"Yeah," I said. "But it'll be fine. I need to spend some time with Charlie."

"Oh, so you're the police chief's daughter," he mumbled, his brow furrowing worriedly.

My stomach turned uncomfortably. It was on days like this that I couldn't eat at all. If I tested the careful balance of my stomach to much, it would come back to haunt me. I only took a sip of my lemonade, pushing the apple away.

"Hey," the Lauren girl said. "Are you anorexic? 'Cause if you aren't eating, then that means you're anorexic. And you could die." Her scowl made me frown a bit in return. "And I know the principal. You can get help for that."

"You know, Lauren," someone with a silky voice said. By the way he was shoving a Ding-Dong in his face, I was sure it wasn't Tyler. "Just because someone chooses not to eat doesn't necessarily mean that they suffer from anorexia nervosa. It could be that because it happens to be there first day at a new school, their stomach is a bit upset."

When I turned to see who had so kindly defended me, I came dangerously close to fainting. The divine creature beside me could only be described as God-like. His eyes were a breath-taking green and lined with dark lashes. The structure of his face was perfectly sculpted, each feature looking like it had been carved out of stone by a master. The mess of hair atop his head was in a perfect bronze disarray. His arms were clothed in a long-sleeved green shirt, but the muscles were still evident.

Lauren stuttered, looking for a response to that. "Well, she . . . uh . . . whatever. I just know that something's wrong with her."

The God-like creature (I'm assuming he's Edward) turned to me and whispered, "Don't mind Lauren. She thinks that anyone who doesn't act perfectly is a failure at life." His voice was velvety smooth, but with a rougher, more driving edge.

"That's reassuring," I muttered.

He laughed. "You'll learn to ignore her. She can even be moderately decent on some rare days."

I giggled and put out my hand for him to shake. "I'm Bella Swan."

"I'm Edward Masen. It's lovely meeting you, Bella," he said as I blushed. The warmth of his large hand that engulfed mine was an amazing feeling. I felt so small and protected when he touched me. "So what brings you up from Phoenix?"

I grimaced. This wasn't the subject I wanted to discuss with my new, beautiful acquaintance. He noticed. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have brought that up."

"It's okay. It's just hard to be away from home," I murmured, avoiding his gaze.

"You don't consider Forks home yet?" he asked, a sad look clouding his beautiful features.

"Well, it's not that I . . . uh . . . no," I sputtered.

He got up, picking up my unbitten apple. "We'll just have to change that then, now won't we," he said, taking a bite of the fruit and walking off.

--

I walked into what seemed a cheerless classroom. The walls were stark white with scattered posters that said something cheesy like, "We've got spirit!" or "Our School Has Character!"

Right.

There were two columns of desks, each with a shiny, black top. There were multiple beakers situated in the corners, each looking especially breakable, which could be dangerous with my severe klutziness.

Speak of the curse and the curse shall appear. Er, something along those lines.

After the teacher signed the slip I had carried to every class, he announced, "Class, this is Isabella Marie Swan, our new student."

I grimaced yet again. I hated when people used my full first name and middle name. "Just call me Bella," I grumbled.

There seemed to be only one open seat in the room: the one beside Edward. As I made my way towards, his desk, my thoughts swirled around his beautiful face, instead of concentrating on not falling. The tile on the floor _whooshed_ closer as I tripped, almost breaking my nose. Before the floor could make friends with my face, a pair of arms scooped around my waist. They brought me back up to a standing position, my back hitting their chest, which felt quite muscled.

When I looked back, Edward was unhooking his arms from around my waist. His cheeks flush a light pink, obviously embarrassed by the contact.

"Thank you," I murmured.

"No problem," he laughed. "So does that happen often?"

It was my turn to blush. "Possibly . . ." He chuckled again, shaking his head. My head shot up as I snapped, "You laugh, but you aren't the one who's fallen so hard that she fractured her tail bone."

It was a good thing class hadn't started because I had apparently said that very loudly. Everyone in the class (including Edward) doubled over laughing. Even Mike had his over his mouth in an attempt at not embarrassing me.

Lovely. I could tell that this would be a swell 45 minutes.

xx

Contrary to what I had thought, it was quiet enjoyable. But that was probably because I had Edward by my side, and we were passing notes.

_Hey,_ he wrote_. Enjoying class?_

_As mush as biology can be enjoyed,_ I replied, slipping the note under his elbow.

_Ha. Very true, my friend,_ he said in the next note.

Wait - _my friend_? Not that I minded the term at all, but I didn't even know that we were would be considered friends yet.

_Are you enjoying this?_ I asked.

_Not that much . . . But I need the information,_ he wrote.

_Doctor?_ I scribbled quickly_._

_Yup._

Before I could reply, he had shoved another note over to me. _Meet me after school behind building five? _it asked.

_Sure,_ I wrote_. What for?_ Why did he want me behind building five? Was there some prank he and his friends would play to freak out the new kid?

_Not telling,_ he replied_._

Oh, dear.

I was going to be alone behind a building with Edward Masen. Holy crap.


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Chapter Notes:**

Thank you so much, those of you who have chosen to read the first chapter of this pathetic little story. For those kind people who reviewed, you get waffles! Huzzah! Also I like to dedicate this chapter to my first reviewer iloveTwilight-kk. YOU ROCK :D

'Tis Chapter Two!

I silently thanked God for letting there be an end to Gym. Back in Phoenix, only one year of Gym was required, so I got it over with my freshman year. But here in the idiotic town I call Forks, it's required all four years. Today, the coach decided to have me play the disastrous game of football. If the person who invented football is out there, I hate you. I fell three times before we started the game, and I somehow managed to hit myself with the football I was holding, _and_ an overly friendly boy named Mike. But he assured me that it was absolutely fine.

I headed towards building five, and all of my body was shaking. I was so close to the back that Edward's presence is practically tangible. I remember his dazzling smile. It was like he held me together, making me everything I am. I don't even know him!

I was so lost in the sweetness of my thoughts, that I didn't hear Edward creep up behind me and then scare the hair off my head.

"Gah!" I shrieked. I had dropped my things in surprise, and left Edward rolling on the ground laughing.

"That was hilarious!" he laughed. He burst into another roar of laughter.

"Well if you just intend to spend the afternoon laughing at me, then I'll just go." I said, marching over to my truck.

"Wait, Bella!" he said, grabbing my arm. He pulled me back behind the building. "Come on, I was just having fun."

"Okay, okay." I said, giving in to the pleading of his eyes. "What am I here for?"

"I was just wondering if you would like to accompany me to a concert of Friday. It's in Seattle." he said in a most gentlemanly fashion.

"What band?"

"Muse."

"I love them!" I squealed.

"I'll take that as a yes." he answered for me. He was, of course, right. "Bye, Bella." He swooped down and pressed his lips to my cheek for just a second. One second, but it was enough.

~*~*~*~

"Hey, Bells. How was your first day?" Charlie said as he walked in from the pouring rain.

"It was fine dad. How was yours?" I said to by cheery father, who had now taken a seat at the table.

"Just fine." he answered, moving over to the sofa, in preparation to watch a game.

"Hey, Dad? What are we doing on Friday?" I asked warily.

"I have night shift down at the station. Why?" he said, sensing that I was asking for a reason.

"Well, I have this, friend, that uh, invited me to a concert on Friday. Do you mind if I go?" I asked, silently pleading that he would say yes.

"Sure, hon'. Just because I'll be out late, doesn't mean you can too though. Got it?" he said, turning to protective parent mode.

"Okay dad." I answered, trying to keep the excitement out of my voice.

~*~*~*~

I had been waiting by my bedroom window, for the moment when the most perfect person on the face of the earth would show up in my driveway. I had on a simple pair of jeans, and one of my nicer t-shirts. I had let my hair hang loose and smooth, flowing down to the small of my back. I'm sure Edward would look like some forgotten Greek god, making me lose my train of thought.

And then he came. He drove up in a shining silver car, the shine being nothing compared to the perfection of his face.

"Hello Ms. Swan. Ready?" he asked me at the doorway.

"Yes I am. Thank you Mr. Masen." I answered, trying to keep from looking into those alluring green eyes.

I hopped in the car, brainstorming interesting conversations to bring up. Politics? No, I didn't understand that. _Wuthering Heights_? No, he didn't like that book. Sports? Why would I even consider trying to talk about that?

"Tell me about your family." Edward suggested, pulling me out of my thoughts.

"There's not much to tell. Charlie and Renee got married fresh out of high school and split shortly after that. Renee ran off with me, who was less than a year old. She moved to Phoenix and met a guy named Phil a couple of years ago. That's it."

"What does Renee look like?" he questioned.

"She looks like me, but she's prettier. And she's much braver than me." I answered truthfully. Edward looked skeptical. "Now tell me about your family."

He hesitated, and then started. "My mother Elizabeth is very kind, and seems to know everything that I'm thinking. My father, Edward senior, is very headstrong and brave. He never hesitates and always tells people what he thinks."

"There's more, isn't there?" I said, remembering his hesitation at the beginning.

"I had a baby sister named Maddie. She was killed." he said so quietly, that I wasn't sure if that's what I heard.

"I'm so sorry Edward." I murmured, wishing I hadn't said anything.

"It's okay. The memory of her is strong is all." he said quietly once again.

The silence lasted for what seemed like years. At first it was painful, to not hear anything but the purr of the engine, but it gradually grew calm. I looked over at the speedometer and gasped.

"You're going 100 miles per hour! Slow down!" I screamed.

"I always go this fast." Edward said calmly, amused with my exclamation. And we're here anyway."

I stepped out of the car, and took a moment to look up. There were buildings stretching for every bit of sky they could get, and car zigzagging around like bugs. It felt like Phoenix. Like home.

"Let's go." Edward said, grabbing my arm like earlier today, and pulling me toward the ticket booth. Edward thanked the woman kindly, and led us to the seats. I could feel the warmth radiating of his creamy skin, making me feel safe. They started the first song, one of my favorites on the album. Edward started to sing along, and I noticed he had quite a nice singing voice.

_I think I'm drowning__  
__asphyxiated__  
__I wanna break this spell__  
__that you've created__you're something beautiful__  
__a contradiction__  
__I wanna play the game__  
__I want the friction__you will be the death of me__  
__you will be the death of me__bury it__  
__I won't let you bury it__  
__I won't let you smother it__  
__I won't let you murder it__our time is running out__  
__our time is running out__  
__you can't push it underground__  
__you can't stop it screaming out__I wanted freedom__  
__bound and restricted__  
__I tried to give you up__  
__but I'm addicted__now that you know I'm trapped sense of elation__  
__you'd never dream of__  
__breaking this fixation__you will squeeze the life out of me__bury it__  
__I won't let you bury it__  
__I won't let you smother it__  
__I won't let you murder it__our time is running out__  
__our time is running out__  
__you can't push it underground__  
__you can't stop it screaming out__  
__how did it come to this?__  
__ooooohh__you will suck the life out of me__bury it__  
__I won't let you bury it__  
__I won't let you smother it__  
__I won't let you murder it__our time is running out__  
__our time is running out__  
__you can't push it underground__  
__you can't stop it screaming out__  
__How did it come to this?__  
__ooooohh_

It was now 10:15 and the concert was over. Edward once again grabbed my arm, but his time pulled me close, as to make sure I didn't get swept away in the sea of people. After we had made our way to the car, Edward let go of me, and I have to admit, I was disappointed. The warm of his body so close to mine felt so good. I let my mind drift into the thoughts of Edward, not paying attention to the minutes floating by on the clock.

"We're here." Edward said, interrupting my wonderful thoughts.

"Thank you so much Edward. I really did enjoy it." I said quietly, thinking of Edward's wonderful singing voice. But those thoughts ended to soon when I got out of the car and made my way towards the house. For the third time that night, Edward grabbed my arm. He pulled me into his arms, and hugged me. And for the second time that night, I felt the heat of Edward's body against mine. It was enough.


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's Chapter Notes:**

In this chapter, Edward and Bella talk about the hardest times in their lives. Bella has very intimate feelings for Edward, but does he feel the same? Read to find out in this exciting chapter! *puts on weird news-caster face*

'Tis Chapter Three! Break Out the vitamin water !

I never knew so much could happen within two weeks. Maybe it was because before, there was no Edward Masen in my life. With each moment I spent in his presence, I believe I fell more and more in love with him. His memories became as precious to me as my own were. I cherished the moments when he would laugh, seeing the way the corners of his eyes would crinkle, and his nose would bunch up, making him look like a child. When I wasn't looking at his eyes, I would think about them. I loved the glassy shine of his irises, the green fused with a light blue.

It seemed that he enjoyed my presence, but I couldn't be sure. Maybe the kiss on the cheek he had given me meant nothing, and he had found a beautiful, witty girl that deserved to be graced by his lips. I wanted him to love me back, even though I would never voice it.

There were many things I shouldn't have voiced when I was with him. Through learning about his happy memories such as getting a goldfish named Spot when he was nine, I also learned about the times when he wasn't as strong, wasn't the Edward I knew.

And I'm not talking about flushing the fish.

"How old was Maddie when she . . . she . . .?" I should've kept my mouth shut like a good girl, but curiosity took over before I could think. I regretted that question more than anything I ever had before.

"Seven months," Edward murmured. "Still a baby." I could hear the way his tone sloped into a misery I had never before heard from him. It scared me.

"How old were you?"

"Six years old," he chuckled darkly, no humor in the beautiful noise.

"Good Lord, Edward," I said. I couldn't imagine being a mere child and watching my sister die, watching those around me, including my mother, go with her. Not physically, but intellectually. I knew Edward wasn't like others at school, always a bit more mature, but I had never known why. He had grown up knowing that he would never see his sister grow with him.

"She was sweet," he murmured. "So, so adorable. My mother did nothing but coo over her, pinch her cheeks. Her eyes were a milky blue, just like my father's. He was so proud to say that she had the Masen eyes. But her hair was just like mine, like my mother's. Her skin was pale, sort of ivory." His thumb brushed over my cheek, going in a gentle circle. "Like yours. I liked hearing her laugh. It reminded me of chimes or bird. My mother always said she would sing when she grew older."

He dropped his hand, and I became afraid that I had angered him. The dreamy, distant look his eyes had held before was gone, replaced with a violent fury.

"But then . . . Then I came home one day, and mom was crying. Sobbing. There was blood everywhere, leading into Maddie's bedroom. I saw that my mom was holding Maddie, but there was a gash in her chest. She had been stabbed by some random psycho in _her own crib_. In her own crib! She died, she was stabbed in her crib! She was killed when my parents were at work, and while I was at school. The babysitter was killed too.

"Whoever killed her will die. I don't care if it's at my own hands, but they will die sometime. I want to see them just as cold as Maddie was, just as still. I want their blood to be on the floor. They don't deserve to live!" My stomach crawled. Edward was never violent, at least not for the time I had known him. He certainly wasn't the type to vow that someone's life would end.

"I'm sure she misses you, wherever she is," I soothed. I took his hand in mine. I hoped my comforting would work; I hated the way anger seemed to radiate from him.

"I guess. I just miss her so much. It feels like I have no way to remember her, and she'll be gone forever," Edward sighed, placing his head on my shoulder. I laid my head on top of his.

"I know, I know," I said softly.

We sat in silence, me rubbing his back in a way I hoped was comforting. His burning rage eventually ran out, leaving only sadness in his eyes. He sighed and squeezed my hand, leaving me practically purring from the warmth we shared. It felt good to have our body heat shared between our palms. But my happiness was extinguished when I saw the single tear slip down Edward's cheek. Before long, they were cascading silently onto my shirt. I couldn't help the fact that his gloom made tears squeeze out of my own eyes. Tears were mildly common from me partially due to the fact that I cried when I was angry, and just moved from Phoenix. But Edward shouldn't cry. I needed his smile, his light.

"Don't be sad," I whispered.

"I just know I'll never see her again, no matter how hard I try," he sniffed. "But she looked a lot like you, except for your eyes." More tears slipped out from the corner of his eyes.

"What do I have to do to make you happy?" I begged. I didn't care what it was. If it brightened his day, it brightened mine.

That had to have been the most beautiful moment of my life. The tiny second of hesitation before his lips touched mine felt so fragile, so precious. It was as if the world had stopped spinning on its perfect axel, waiting for our skin to make contact. But when they finally did, I forgot about all the beauty I had felt before. This second was so much more achingly gorgeous.

Edward's hands slipped to the back of my neck to pull me closer, while my hands tangled themselves into his bronze, tousled hair. Our lips moved together, perfectly synchronized. It was as if we had been born that way. My hands moved to marvel at the broad expanse of his shoulders. I could feel all of the tendons and muscles; so smooth, so toned. I loved the masculine smell he gave off, some sort of mix with laundry detergent.

I pulled back and smiled. There were remains of salt water on his face, but this time, Edward looked ecstatic. He flashed me a brilliant grin and said, "Yup, perfectly cheery."

**Chapter End Notes:**

I hope you liked that little scene! I tried to show Edward's soft side, but I'm not sure if I nailed it. If you can spare a minute of your time, I would greatly appreciate it if you would review. Thanks!


	4. Chapter 4

**Author's Chapter Notes:**

And I took my time on it because I wanted it to be a bit longer. My other chapters have been like 800 words long, or something inexcusable like that. But this chapter was seven 1/2 pages on Microsoft Word. Enjoy

Chapter Four of The Adventures of Bella and Human Boy

"Hello, Mr. Masen. For what do I have the pleasure of seeing thee today?" I giggled in an over-done English accent.

"Forgive me for not telling before I called, but I had to see thy beautiful eyes." Edward replying in the same English accent, though his sounded much more authentic. He bowed in a most gentlemanly fashion, and chuckled. I held out my hand for him to take, so we could head off to the bland wonders of first hour. But he instead grabbed my wrist and brought me in to a tight embrace. His lips pressed into mine for a quick second. One second, yet it still made my heart flutter about five times faster. He leaned down and let his head rest on my chest tenderly. He laughed when he heard my heart accelerate.

"Hmm. . . . not fast enough. I should fix that." he chuckled. The beautiful face that I seemed to depend upon now leaned into mine for a long kiss. My hands rooted themselves firmly in his soft hair, while his stayed at his side. I wished he would touch my face or even just hold my hand. This non-responsive mode was ticking me off. His hands eventually crept up to the back of my neck, and gave me quite the shock. In those hands, he held the newly fallen snow, which he then decided would be a good thing to put down the back of my shirt. I screeched and pushed away his laughing body.

"That . . . was . . . . hilarious!" he said between fits of laughter.

"No it was not, you idiot! Gah! Thanks for making my back wet!" I roared, but I could still hear a faint amount of amusement in my voice. He would pay for this, I would make sure of that.

"Am I forgiven?" he said to my face that was now turned childishly away. "Bella? Pwease? Pwetty pwease?" he cooed. It was impossible to resist him when he got soft and cuddly like this.

"Edward!" I moaned. "Don't get like that. You're so annoying. Must you act like an immature child?" I snapped.

But Edward certainly wouldn't have that. His strong arms that had caught me my first day of school now wrapped around my waist. "Please, Bella? I'm sorry. I was childish, and completely inexcusable. Will you forgive me?" he said, his voice back to its usual serious tone.

"Okay, okay. . . . I forgive you, you big baby." I sighed. The effect he had on me always got my forgiveness; not that he really had much for me to forgive him for.

"Thank you." he whispered into my ear. "No offense, but it was hard not to laugh at your face. The expression was priceless!" he grinned, but quickly got serious when he saw my grimace. His laughter and cheery mood was deflated now.

"Edward," I said. "You know I still like you, right? Come on, don't look sad. Pwease?" I whimpered, repeating his earlier pleas. Making him sad made _me_ sad.

He heaved a great, overdramatic sigh. "Well, okay, I guess. But you'll have to make it up to Me." he smiled mischievously.

"Make it up to you? What do you mean, exactly?" I asked warily.

"About six months ago, I found this little meadow. And it's beautiful. You should see the way it's shaped, and the wildflowers that are spread around the grass make it seem like it's from some wonderful movie. You have to see it, Bella." his eyes had glazed over with a dream-like quality that made me think of an angel painted in a forgotten chapel. He came back from his imagination, and looked back at me. The excitement he was radiating was practically tangible, and definitely visible on his angelic features. I suddenly realized my mouth had fallen open in wonder. I quickly shut it, not wanting to look like an imbecile.

"I'd be willing to go if would make you happy." I agreed.

"Thank you, Bella. And I assure you, it will." he beamed. And with that he led me off towards first hour. I was glad we had arrived at school thirty minutes early, or otherwise our fits of anger would have caused us to be late. I hopped into my chair, ready for the day to come now that I had made my Edward happy.

"Jessica is fuming at the sight of us holding hands. She thinks I should be with her right now instead of you." Edward whispered into my ear.

"How do you know?" I asked, very confused at his confidence at what Jessica is thinking.

"I don't know. It's just a feeling inside me that's telling me that that's what she's thinking. Kind of like how you know how to breathe or something of the sort." he whispered back.

"What about me? What am I thinking?" I questioned, testing his "feeling".

"I don't know. You're kind of hard to read. But by your face I can tell that you are thoroughly amused. Why?" he asked, frustrated with my expression.

"I highly doubt that you can read minds, Edward Cullen. The fact that you can't read mine is proof. So there." I explained.

He shook his head and smiled at my explanation. I closed my mind to everything except the tick of the clock. The ticks ache with each little tock, a reminder of everything I haven't done. A quote comes to mind . . . . . _Times goes you say? Ah, no! Alas, time stays. _**_We_**_ go._ If you think about it, time is terrifying, making life what it wants, and taking everything we need with its devilish tricks. It makes fools of us, making sure we can't get where we want to be the most. Time is certainly the greatest distance between things. It is an amazing teacher, but it kills all of its pupils. Time is what's keeping me from loving Edward forever. Time keeps me from being able to run with him for the rest of my life.

The bell suddenly rings, reminding me of the time I've lost. I pick up my books and pencil, completely unaware of Edward's arm sliding around my shoulders.

"Tell me what you're thinking." he murmured.

"Clocks." I admitted.

"Clocks." he scoffed. "They mean nothing, and only slay what does mean something."

I blinked. Edward wasn't usually this serious. But then again, after hearing Maddie's story, I had learned to expect different sides of Edward.

"Come on, Bella. It gets very frustrating when you get thoughtful like this." Edward said, reminding me of where I was,

"Sorry." I muttered. I stepped into the dreary classroom and set my books down. Chalk and dust made the air thick and herd to breath. Even after being in Forks for four months, I hadn't gotten used to the humid and clogged air. Class started just the same as every day. I put down answers to questions that didn't matter, and looked at a teacher who thought they had wasted their life on kids that didn't care. But at the end, her lips twisted into a forced smile and called attention to the classroom.

"I feel like we should maybe play up this class. How about some personal questions. Once out of college, what occupation do you plan to get?" she forced out of that forced smile. Many students raised their hands in the air, including myself.

"Mrs. Mallory, how about you?" she asked.

"A model. I plan to meet all the best. And then beat them." Lauren chirped in competitive voice.

"And you, Mr. Masen?" she questioned.

"A neurologist, ma'am." Edward replied in a polite tone.

"How very interesting." she grunted. The bell then rang as a relieved look spread across the instructor's face.

The day went on much like this. I suffered in calculus and gym; I was without Edward in those classes. The droning of the every teacher's voice almost lulled me to sleep. And I really did fall asleep in calculus. The clocks taunted me with each tick and tock they muttered. But the long wait for his presence was well worth it when I was greeted with a broad smile. I felt my own lips break out in a grin too.

"How was your day?" Edward asked.

"Bearable. I would have had a lot more fun if you were there with me." I replied.

"The same for me." he commented. "It feels good to be free. And to be free with such a wonderful person is even better."

"Where should we go? I want to be with you every minute I can." I answered.

"How about the usual spot?" he suggested. So it was behind building five where went yet again. I sat down in the damp grass. My backpack sagged as did I; tired from the monotonous classes I had suffered. A light mist fell on my cheeks and clung to my thin lashes, making my hair glisten with crystals. Edward sat down beside me and grabbed my hand. Even the little touches he gave me seemed to make my hands tremble. I looked up and saw a smile playing around on Edward's lips. It felt like it had been long since I had felt their warmth on mine, though it was only this morning I had last touched them. My fingers touched his cheek lightly; relishing the softness of his creamy skin. His face was truly a work of higher power. Only God would be able to make something so pure and beautiful. The green eyes that dazzled me now focused on mine, making me lose my train of thought.

He pulled me up in his strong embrace, making sure I was close. The silence settled in and gave the empty back lot a feeling of peace.

"I can't think of anything more beautiful on the face of the earth." Edward observed.

"I never knew you found the backside of building five so attractive." I grinned.

"Not the building, you silly girl. I meant you." he objected.

"Me? I don't think so." I disagreed.

"No matter how many times you object, it'll still be true." he countered.

I sighed in defeat. No matter how many times I objected, Edward would still carry on the foolish belief that it was true. He liked me more than I deserved. I felt him sigh against my back and kiss my hair. Though he couldn't see, I smiled. If only I had known about Edward when I lived back in Phoenix, then I could have moved here years ago, and been with Edward. I could've been in his arms and kissing his soft lips years ago instead of wasting seventeen years in a city that wasn't even home. I wouldn't have wasted years with an unhappy mother and been with a . . . a what? Edward wasn't a friend. No, he was far more than that. But he was so much more than a boyfriend. Note to self: think of word to describe Edward. And his beautiful face.

"I should go. I need to make Charlie dinner." I said.

"Alright. My parents are probably wondering where I am, too." he agreed. He got up and started walking towards his Volvo, when I grabbed his wrist.

"I have to tell you good-bye!" I proclaimed. I grabbed his broad shoulders and dragged his face towards mine. The short minute in which I got kiss Edward was wonderful. I could spend eternity doing it, but unfortunately we both have to breathe.

"We should say good-bye more often." he panted.

I giggled and waved good-bye to the person I loved.

~*~*~*~*~

I woke up the next day to find a note on the counter from Charlie.

_Dear Bella,_

_I have to work at the station today. I'll be home late. I should be back at 3:30 a.m._

_Love, Charlie_

So I'd have the entire day to myself. This could be fun . . . .

Just then, the phone rang shrilly, interrupting my devilish ideas. I shuffled over, thinking that it would be my father calling to reminding me to get groceries, or something of the sort. When I picked up the phone I was not expecting a velvety voice to be at the other end.

"Hey, Bella. How are you this fine morning?" Edward said cheerfully.

"Tired." I snipped, anger that I had not anticipated crept out of my voice.

"Well get rested, because I'll be over in an hour to pick you up." he answered, oblivious to my lack of sleep.

"Edward, I just got-" I started, but then stopped when I heard the other line disconnecting. "Rude!" I snapped at the phone.

But I wasn't going to deny I day with Edward. My feet failed me many times as I made my way hurriedly up the stairs. Where were those strong arms when you needed them? I took extra time on making sure my clothes were smooth and wrinkle-free. My hair refused to be tamed, to I let it be in a frizzy pony-tail. Blue tennis shoes I had acquired one year ago were all I had beside me comfortable flats, so that's what I slipped on. I was never a girl for caking on makeup, so I left my face bare. My breakfast was an extravagant meal of Cheerios and apple juice. This extravagant meal threatened many times to come back and haunt me though during my excitement.

My heart almost made an escape from the confines of my chest as I saw a certain silver Volvo arrive in my driveway. The rain made a soft _tip tappit _noise on the shaggy and over-grown grass. Everything around me was green. It seemed like my eyes hadn't seen the green in the trees and shrubbery around me, and my eyes had only been focusing on two green things: Edward's eyes. Though we were only human, it seemed that Edward was more beautiful than possible for a human. The way his eyelashes framed wide eyed that would melt Antarctica. The way the soft curve of his lips turned when he flashed a smile. The way his nose twitched slightly when he was frustrated. Every single part of Edward was beautiful. How could he ever look at me without disgust?

"Hello, angel." he mused. His muscular chest was clothed in a dark blue shirt, also wearing jeans and blue tennis shoes. We matched.

"Hi." I murmured into his shirt has he pulled me into a hug.

"Where will we be going today?" I asked once he let me go.

"Remember the meadow I told you about? The one by the trail-head outside of town?" he said, trying to jog my memory.

"You mean it's in the forest? With twigs and branches and things to fall on?" I squawked, thinking of the stitches I would have on my forehead by 4:00.

"Silly girl," Edward breathed into my ear. "I won't let you fall. But so that you don't fall, I may have to keep my arms around you for a while. Is that alright?"

"Whatever you want, Edward, whatever you want." I purred in response.

And with that, we hopped into the car, Edward ignoring the speed limit once again. Idiot.

His long fingers pressed the black button on his dashboard until he found a song that suited him. I recognized the song immediately. The ensnaring melody began, as did Edward's voice to the thought-provoking lyrics.

I'm so tired of being here

Suppressed by all my childish fears

And if you have to leave

I wish that you would just leave

'Cause your presence still lingers here

And it won't leave me alone

These wounds won't seem to heal

This pain is just too real

There's just too much that time cannot erase

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears

When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears

I held your hand through all of these years

But you still have all of me

You used to captivate me

By your resonating light

Now I'm bound by the life you left behind

Your face it haunts

My once pleasant dreams

Your voice it chased away

All the sanity in me

These wounds won't seem to heal

This pain is just too real

There's just too much that time cannot erase-

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears

When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears

I held your hand through all of these years

But you still have all of me

You used to captivate me

By your resonating light

Now I'm bound by the life you left behind

Your face it haunts

My once pleasant dreams

Your voice it chased away

All the sanity in me

These wounds won't seem to heal

This pain is just too real

There's just too much that time cannot erase-

I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone

But though you're still with me

I've been alone all along

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears

When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears

I held your hand through all of these years

But you still have all of me

Holy crap. Edward Masen is an amazing singer! It was like . . . Sushi. There really is no other way to describe it. His voice was raw, yet alluring. Alluring in a way that made you want to sing along with him. So I did. My voice was nothing to talk of. I could sing in tune, but I certainly wasn't any Amy Lee. I was surprised when Edward spoke up.

"Whoa, Bella. I didn't know you were a singer. That was good!" he said.

"Yeah right. You were the one who could make Simon Cowell cry. I've never heard anything like it before. Face it, Edward: you're good." I protested.

"Whatever, Bella. We're here anyway." he said pushing aside my earlier speech.

I set off towards the head of the trail, being careful not to trip along the way. The sky was a sheet of gray clouds ahead, the rain fleeing towards another town. Clouds crept behind us though, making sure the day could not be fully enjoyed. But all in all, it was a fair day for Forks. I was quickly pulled out of my reverie when Edward grabbed the back of my shirt.

"Wrong way." he said.

"But you said it was on the trail!" I protested.

"I do believe I said I was by the trail. Not that we were taking the trail. Come on, it's not that far." Edward said. I sighed and stepped into the thick curtain of foliage.

~*~*~*~

Edward's ideas of "not that far" are very different from a normal person's. Why you ask? Because we've gone at least five miles and it's taken us six hours. The main reason was probably because I kept falling down every ten minutes- sometimes even more. But at least Edward caught me every time.

"How much longer?" I asked for what was probably the eighth time this half-hour.

"Now much longer. I think I'm starting to see It." he said, peering off at some light I couldn't see.

We continued our trek in silence. The humidity of Forks used to bother me, but I forgot that as soon as the mosquitoes came. I'll probably look like a demented pepperoni by the end of the day. But though I had small insects craving my blood, the forest was strangely peaceful. The trees were tall and mighty, as if they had seen many hard times. I saw rabbits scurrying behind trees, and chipmunks grabbing things in a great hurry in order to avoid the tall creatures that had come to their home. My mind wandered to the beauty of the things around me, absorbing what I had never before seen in dry Phoenix.

"Can you see it now?" Edward asked excitedly.

"Yes!" I chirped. Before me, about thirty feet, laid a green meadow, adorned with tall wildflowers. Tall trees caressed the side, making it a space closed off completely except for the small door-sized opening I looked through. It was like I piece of heaven had dropped down and landed just for our pleasure.

"It's beautiful!" I gasped. It was more than beautiful. But right now, I don't have a word to describe it.

Edward grabbed my hand and pulled me towards the lovely meadow. Once inside the circle, I kicked off my tennis shoes. The grass was feathery and soft. And the smell . . . the smell was there, but just barely. Fragrances of the flowers wafted up towards my nose, sending a smile onto my face. Faint trickling noises that sounded like a stream reached my ears, along with a soft humming sound. It turned out to be Edward humming a foreign melody.

I suddenly realized that Edward was with me, and turned to look at him. His shoulders were relaxed and showed no sign of anxiety. Shadows flitted down his cheeks when he blinked. A small leaf was tangled in his red hair, so I reached to get it. My hands were shaking for some reason. Was I scared to touch him when he looked so serene right now? I turned away and stepped towards the middle of the circle. The small rays of sun touched my skin lightly when a cloud fluttered off. I sighed contentedly.

"You're breath-taking." Edward breathed into my ear. He was much closer than I had thought he was, and it shook me out of my calm state. But I ended up blushing at the undeserved comment I had gotten from Edward.

"You are the one who's been leaving me breathless lately." I murmured in response. I sat down in the dewy grass and laid back. The clouds had banished the sun once more, leaving the sky an unwrinkled gray blanket. My eyelids flew shut, in hopes I could melt into the very ground and stay here forever. Edward lay down beside me and sighed as well. My thoughts wandered from the grass I laid upon, to Edward. I loved Edward. I know I do, but for some reason, I can't verbalize it. I want him to hear that I love him, and that I would do anything for him. If only he could know.

"Edward," I began nervously. "Can I tell you something?"

"What is it, Bella? Are you alright?' he answered worriedly. The way he cared about my safety made my hearts skip a couple of beats.

"I'm fine, Edward." I giggled. "Actually, I'm wonderful."

"Yes you are." Edward purred as he rolled towards me. Edward has kissed me before. And a lot. But never before was the kiss so passionate or exultant. His arms snaked their way around my waist, pulling me in towards his well muscled chest. My fingers put themselves on his neck, attempting to get him even closer, though there was no space left. My breathing became ragged as his lips crushed mine. I also noticed he was panting too when we came up for air.

"I love you, Edward." I gasped.

"I love you too, Bella." he panted back. "Forever."


	5. Chapter 5

Two months after that awesomeful day in the meadow.

Edward loved me. Could anything make me happier? I know I don't deserve Edward, and there are so many other girls out there for him, but I can't help but feel there is so much more to come. The years are flying right in front of my eyes. Sitting behind a college library, Edward sliding down on one knee in front of me, my stomach growing large with the weight of a child, and finally, holding each other's hands even when we're old and wrinkled. It's quite a beautiful future in my opinion. But does Edward want it? Maybe he loves me now, but what about in a couple of months, when some beautiful girl from Switzerland comes to town? Being on love with Edward Masen is a fairy-tale, but knowing I might lose him sucks.

What really sucks is all of the attractive girls in school. Lauren Mallory looks like a Marilyn Monroe in the making, Jessica Stanley looks like one of the popular girls from the movie _Mean Girls_, not even mentioning all of the other girls in school. And me? I look like a little mouse. I'm skinny, pale, and have brown hair. Whoop. So Edward's beautiful green eyes but have a rare seeing disorder, because he's blind to the beauty that surrounds him.

Every day at lunch, I'll ask questions on petty things that don't matter, just so that I can hear his velvety voice. And I watch him. I watch as him mouth forms into a long oval as he bites into the ivory flesh of an apple. I watch as his eyes almost close completely when he tilts his head back to take a drink of his water. And I notice that when my direction is pulled elsewhere, he watches me. What does he see? Does he see a girl he puts up with just so she'll me happy? Or does he see someone he loves?

"Ms. Swan? Are you with us?" the sharp voice of the teacher squawked, bringing me back to class.

"Huh?" I said, pulling myself back out of my reverie. I realized I was in government, and had probably just missed a useless lecture on the evolution of the constitution including its philosophical foundations, amendments, and court interpretation. Yeah, something like that.

"The answer?" he persisted. I had no chance of answering; I had already zoned out before class had even begun.

"Nuclei." Edward answered for me. Oh wait, I was in biology.

"That's right Mr. Masen. Pay attention, Ms. Swan." the teacher snapped. I looked down at the desk. What was with me today? I was usually a role-model student, and paid attention all the time. My grades were great, well, excluding my trigonometry grade. My eyes rarely leave the board, and only for taking notes. Well, except for when Edward caught my eye. Then it was kind of hard to concentrate, with those big green eyes luring you in . . .

I shook my head. Paying attention today would be harder than I thought. I felt the scratch of a piece of paper against my arm, and looked to see a piece of paper neatly folded. While keeping my eyes on the board, as if I was actually paying attention, I grabbed the note and opened it.

_What's with you today?_ Edward's neat script read_._

_I don't know. Just tired, maybe._ I scribbled back_._

_I'm not buying it, Bella. What is going on with you? The truth please._ he wrote back quickly.

_Just some things on my mind. That's it. Really._ I scribbled on the small sheet of paper. I slid the paper over to him and saw that he had written a reply, but refrained from sending it since the teacher was circling our area.

There really were things on my mind, but they were bothering me more than I had said. What if Edward left me? The thought made my heart ache and skin go cold. I grabbed Edward's hand, as if that would stop him from leaving. His eyes questions my suspicious behavior, but gladly accepted my hand.

For the rest of class, my eyes only left the blackboard to take quick notes, and the occasional looks at the gorgeous boy next to me. Don't judge! You try sitting next to the most beautiful person on the planet and then try to keep your eyes on a board!

The bell trilled, signaling that I had to abandon Edward for gym. Which I would most likely fall in over eight times before I got onto the court. But if I got to see my own personal Greek god afterwards, I would gladly go through with the suffering. I kissed Edward's cheek lightly before pushing the door open to my own personal hell.

~*~*~*~*~*~

That was torture. If you've heard of concentration camps, then you know what I'm talking about. Gym is a place where I simply don't belong. The shiny wood floors and hard basketballs are simply not objects that I should be around. But Mike Newton took pity (was it pity or infatuation?) on me and picked me for his basketball team. The other players covered my position and steered clear of my klutzy feet. But I still managed to fall multiple times, pulling Mike down with me in one instance.

But the terrible memories of gym vanished when I saw Edward's angelic face waiting for me outside the door. A goofy grin spread across my face, which probably made me look like an over-excited duck. But right now I don't care, because Edward Masen is right in front of me.

"C'mon. Let's go to our place." he suggested. _Our_ place. The feeling of knowing that Edward and I had a place made me grin so widely, that I'm surprised my face stayed in one piece. The afternoon was fairly similar to our day in the meadow, though the clouds loomed closer to our sitting place. Ever since that day two months ago in the meadow, I had spent every moment I could with Edward. Before sleep overtook me at night, I thought of his voice. I pretended he could lay in bed with me, and whisper a lullaby in my ear. I had never heard Edward play piano, but Edward is not the type of person who would climb through windows, sadly.

Edward grabbed my shoulders and turned my body do that I was facing him. His eyes gleamed with determination, as he started speaking. "Bella, I want you tell me what's wrong. The truth, young lady." he demanded. This parent-like behavior was quite rare. Edward was usually serious and quiet, but never did he act like his next move would be grounding me.

"I . . . um . . .uh . . . ." I stuttered, getting lost in the depths of his eyes. "You, er, leaving me. For uh. . . someone prettier."

His face fell from its former impish grin. "Why would I do that?" he stormed.

"So that you can be with someone much more beautiful and/or talented." I answered truthfully.

"Why would I do that when I already have such a beautiful girl?" he asked, softening up. "Do I have to prove it to you?"

"I don't know what you could do to-" I started, but was stopped when Edward crushed his lips against mine. I felt my books drop to the moist ground as my arms snaked themselves around his neck. His hands found their way to my waist and quickly pulled me closer. I felt my back hit the brick wall of building five, which meant Edward was trying to make sure I couldn't escape. His tongue lightly touched my bottom lip, begging for entrance. I opened up and knotted my fingers in his silky hair. It was so _soft_.

An idea suddenly pricked the side of brain. He would pay for his antics that day he put snow down my shirt. I slid down the wall and ducked under Edward's arms and ran. At first he didn't realize I was gone, so he leaned forward and smacked his nose against the brick wall. I burst into a roar of laughter as he rubbed at his aching schnozzle. He turned his head and caught sight of me rolling on the ground laughing. He sprinted over and picked up my body and began laughing himself. From his shaking frame, I could tell I was forgiven. We were even now, but not for long if Edward kept up his pranks. Though I dreamt through most of the day, I had learned one thing: bricks walls are definitely a great way to get revenge.


	6. Chapter 6

I awoke with a jolt as my alarm belted out one of my favorite songs. You might love a song when you play it at 5:00 p.m., but when he brings you out of a wonderful dream at six in the morning, it's terrible. My hand slammed down on the snooze button. The floor felt cold as I slipped out of bed to get ready. Everything was cold in Forks. That is, everything but Edward's warm hands. I longed for the monotonous school day to start, just so that I could touch him warm and silky skin. Of course, school isn't very dreary when you go to class with Edward Cullen. Edward was the only reason I got out of bed and went to school every day. Every breath that whooshed through my lungs was so that I would stay alive to hear his velvety voice.

I turned the volume down until it would be almost silent and played the music. The song always got my foot tapping and head bopping up and down slightly. The way his voice wrapped itself around the guitar perfectly, and the enraged drums beats combined with a drive like no other, simply made me happy.

There's a lot that I don't know

There's a lot that I'm still learning

But I think I'm letting go

To find my body is still burning

And you hold me down

And you got me living in the past

Come on and pick me up

Somebody clear the wreckage from the blast

And I'm alive

And I don't need a witness

To know that I survived

I'm not looking for forgiveness

I just need light

I need light in the dark as I search for the resolution

And the bars are finally closed

So I try living in the moment

'Til the moment it just froze

And I felt sick and so alone

I can hear the sound

Of your voice still ringing in my ear

I'm going underground

But you'll find me anywhere I feel

That I'm alive

And I don't need a witness

To know that I survived

I'm not looking for forgiveness

I just need light

I need light in the dark as I search for the resolution

I need light in the dark as I search for the resolution

You hold me down

You hold me down

I'm alive

And I don't need a witness

To know that I survived

I'm not looking for forgiveness

I'm alive

And I don't need a witness

To know that I survived

I'm not looking for forgiveness

I just need light

I need light in the dark as I search for the resolution

I need light in the dark as I search for the resolution

I need light, I need light

By now I had on a simple olive t-shirt and dark jeans. I slipped on my blue tennis shoes and did nothing to my hair but brush it. I knew Edward didn't like when I did anything more, so I left my face plain also. After shoving a bowl of cereal down my throat, I hopped into my prehistoric truck. The morning was cold, and the moon still hung whole and ripe in the sky. Baby rays of sunlight peeked over the distant horizon, barely lighting the roads. The grass beside the dark road caught rays and sparkles. The shimmers remind me of Edward's green eyes when he looks up in the sky.

I stop my truck at the corner of the lot and sit for minute, enjoying the silence. I'm the first one at school today; a rarity for me. The picnic tables that no one uses are dry, so I sit down and pull out Wuthering Heights. I flip to one of my favorite parts: Edgar is away and Heathcliff has come to visit Cathy while he can. Cathy and Heathcliff get caught up in a moment and Edgar almost walks in on them embracing. I lose myself in the book, and hardly notice the students flocking around the school. By the time I look up, Edward is walking towards me. By the way he bears no smile, I can tell something is wrong. His expression is distant, as if he's seeing a different world than I am.

"Hey." I say as I get up to kiss him. My arms wrap around him, but when I move my lips towards his, he turns his face away.

"Bella." he grunted. My face fell immediately. Edward was a person who was almost never sad. That excludes the days when Maddie is on his mind. But I've learned that it's easy to cheer him up. Very simple yet very effective methods . . . .

"What? Did I do something wrong?" I worried aloud.

"Well actually, I need to talk to you." he replied. I whimpered; I knew what he was going to say, and I couldn't bear to hear it. Before Edward, I've never had a . . . . well, Edward. But I'm certainly not ignorant. He would tell me that he didn't want me. He'd tell me that I just wasn't the right kind of girl for him, and that he wanted someone more attractive and clever. And I'd let him go, though it would cut me deeper than any blade could.

"I think we should stop seeing each other. I know we said lots of things, but the truth is, I didn't mean them. I'm sorry for wasting your time." he said stiffly.

"But you said you loved me! What did it mean, then?" I demanded, my unintended anger pouring out of me.

"It meant that I was . . . . bored. You were just a toy, Bella, for a very bored child. But I'm going to ask Jessica out." he grabbed my shoulders. "But I want you to be happy for me. And I want you to be happy. Why don't you ask Mike out? He'll actually love you." he suggested. I searched his face for some sign of humor, to tell me he was joking. As my eyes settled on his, a bit of pain poked around in his eyes, but quickly left.

I was vaguely aware of the students passing by me, and the shrill call of the bell. But why bother? This day has already turned sour. And so has every day after it.

It's strange how the song I listened to this morning was almost prophetic. I can't speak. And even if I could, there would be no words leaving my lips. Partially because I'm confused. I'm a toy. Edward told me he loved me because he was bored? It's not like I wasn't expecting this; he deserves someone better. Someone who knows how to love and that he'll love back. Another reason of why no words fall off my lips: my life has been taken away. But I know I'll never love like that again. He wasn't a random boy I met. He was the other half of me. Edward was my bright sun in this drizzly little town. The days ahead would be very dark.

Dark . . .

Dark . . . .

Dark . . . .

**Chapter End Notes:**

Yeah, I know. Sad and short. But trust me there's more drama to come. And it might not be so bad this time . . .


	7. Chapter 7

Bella's POV

I've been dead for a whole month. I can see myself shriveling up like a worm that got stuck on a summer sidewalk. The gashes in my torso are a common reminder that he loves someone else. Whenever my thoughts travel to his alluring green eyes, pain cuts across my mid-section. And sleep doesn't help at all. Every night, I wake up screaming for a different reason. Last night's dream was the most menacing.

_Edward's warm hand grips mine tightly as our feet make small squashing sounds along the forest floor. It's twilight, but night seems to creep quicker underneath the leaves of the trees. But somehow, there is no fear at all inside of me. Night seems much more beautiful when there's an angel to guide you through it. Edward was leading me towards the meadow. He hadn't told me, and I hadn't asked, but I somehow knew. It took only minutes to get there. Edward grabbed my waist and pulled me down onto the moist grass. His arms encircled my waist as his lips moved towards mine. My eyelids fluttered closed as my lips moved closer to his . . . ._

_All of the sudden, there was just air before me. I looked up to see Edward being dragged back into the trees by a pair of sickeningly pale hands. One hand covered his mouth so that only dampened cries could be heard. The other hand's fingers were clenched in his bronze hair, which the hands were using to pull him away. ( _**a.n. any guesses where I got that from?) **

"_Edward!" I screamed. My feet felt like cinder blocks. I would never be able to save Edward before he was hurt by this mysterious force. Before I could get across the meadow, he had been dragged into the tangles of foliage. Somewhere within the flesh-like weed, I knew my love was suffering. Sure enough, a tortured cry came from within the trees. Screams and shrieks erupted from the dark, my name being called in the form of a plea for help. Yet I couldn't move._

_A great pile of red stuff came flying out of the bushes and towards me. I stepped aside, not wanting to be hit by the mysterious object. It landed with a thud by my feet. I carefully looked down at the red heap and gasped. It was Edward's mangled carcass._

The dreams always lasted for a short time, yet they still managed to plague me with their morbid images all day.

But there was something much worse than the dreams. It was seeing Edward with Jessica Stanley every day. The way she drapes herself over him in front of everyone, as if she wants us all to know she owns him. I should be happy that he has someone that he actually loves, and that loves him back. But I can't help but be jealous. There's no reason for Edward not to like Jessica. Over the last six months, her scrawny form has bloomed like a flower of flame and perfume. Jessica looks like a Barbie doll now. Her face always shows happiness, and never changes. Her body is long and overly thin. I won't even try to tell of the ridiculously skimpy outfits she wears. If I did, I'd puke.

As for me, I still look like a mouse. While I used to be a happy, scrawny mouse, I'm now a scrawny mouse that's clothed in a web of grief and guilt. Guilt for holding him back from all of the other girls that surround him, and not being what he needs. Grief for knowing that he wants the other girls, and that I'm not what he needs.

I can feel myself dying, and I know it's only a matter of time before I slip through the cracks.

I turn to the modern-day genius we call Oprah Winfrey. On her show, there's a sob story about a woman whose husband left her. Oprah suggested a hobby. Hobbies?! I'm not good at much of anything. In fourth grade, Renee tried to get me interested in her latest infatuation: knitting. Truth be told, I was terrible at it. But I remember that when she wasn't hounding me on making mittens or a scarf, I drew. It was almost like a secret love at the time. For some reason, ripping the emotion from objects that I saw every day was calming. Art was about looking at things. Looking at a tree and trying to figure out why it still breathes and claws at the sky. Looking at a piece of silk and trying to figure out why the silk wants to be so soft.

The next day, I began my search for a simple sketch pad and colored pencils. I brought with me some of the money I was going to use to buy a car when I got to Forks. After getting Charlie's unexpected gift, a lot of money had been left in my pockets. And when one had extra money, it's much easier to give into temptation. Needless to say, I went back home with more than some colored pencils.

After dumping the items from the white plastic bag, I assessed how much damage had been done. I had a pack of acrylic paints, two boxes of charcoal sticks, an innumerable amount of paintbrushes, eight blending sticks, two canvases, one yellow paper sketch book, and three other sketchbooks. On top of that, I had gotten a book on Rembrandt Van Rijn. This would be an interesting way to forget about my soul-mate.

~!~!~!~!~

By the time Charlie got home, I was more colorful than the yellow paper sketch book. I decided that a bit of sadness and angst in a drawing would be beneficial. But the question was, I have no idea of what to draw. I could draw a girl with black rope tied around her face and body. Or I could draw a girl kneeling in the grass under the yellow moonlight, surrounded by candles.

After sitting motionless for an hour, inspiration knocked me upside the head. I grabbed the notebook and flipped to open page with gusto. But once my pencil was on the page, my motions became careful and soft. Every time the pencil ground itself against the page, a new light flipped on in the back of my head. It was a strange sense that made my pencil stop mid-stroke. It was every muscle in my body relaxing, except for one string deep inside my head. It was frightening, yet one of the most amazing things I had ever felt.

Eventually, the mass of lines and swishes on the page became the forlorn face of a girl. A thin mask had been pulled over her face, as if it would shield her from all that was demonic and evil. There was a gaping hole in the mask that was right over her eye. The hole somehow let her see that the world that she had been shielded from didn't hold what she expected.

For hours, I looked at the sketch as if it were an intricate puzzle. Why had my pencil put this on the paper? Why not a rainbow or a purple bunny? After staring for hours, I finally understood who was in the picture, and why I had done it. It was me, and the world without Edward wasn't all I had hoped it would be.

~!~!~!~!~

The next terrible day.

School is painful. Not because I don't enjoy learning, or that I think our subject are boring, but that I see Edward every day, and know that he doesn't love me. Every single thing I do reminds me of Edward. When a teacher writes in green chalk, I think of his eyes. Whenever I eat pizza, I think of that first time I met him. And biology is the hardest. Every day, I sit next to his warm body, and know I don't have the right to hold his hand or stroke his face. I know that there will never be any more meetings behind building five. Edward isn't mine anymore, and quite frankly, it sucks.

But one thing that eases the ache in my torso knows that I can draw after school. I can hate the paper with every cell in my body if I want, and then draw a vile picture as punishment. I'll pick a subject that has nothing to do with love; I'll do dirt. I'll draw mud smeared across the wall of a building. Clumps of grass with cling to the brick along with the mud. Yup, completely loveless.

When the bell finally rings, I take me time to gather my books. Every step I take is silent and slow as I head toward building five. When I can get my hands on a pencil, I swear I'm gonna--

My thoughts freeze as I see the couple kissing by the brick wall. It takes my frozen mind to register that it's Jessica and Edward. Edward is in between Jessica and the wall, and looks bored. His hands hang limp at his side, whereas Jessica's hands are everywhere at once. _She's touching his chest!_ I thought. I told myself to shut up, and that Edward wasn't mine anymore. Jessica could touch Edward all she wanted now.

The couple obviously sensed another presence and broke apart. Edward looked me straight in the eye and stuttered. Jessica's voice is clear and firm, along with the annoyed (and somehow smug) look on her face.

"Hey, Bella. Do you think you could give some privacy?" she demanded with the most sickening devilish glint in her eyes. She doesn't wait for my answer and slams her mouth down on Edward's. I saw her tongue slide out and lick Edward's face as if she were a flea-ridden dog.

The tears don't wait for me to be alone before they start. I hope I crash on my way home.

~!~!~!~!~

Edward's POV

This is disgusting. Jessica's hands are running up and down my body, and now climbing up my shirt. Her tongue is flitting around my mouth. I know I don't love Jessica, so why am I here? Because I'm an idiot, that's why.

I'm an idiot for leaving the only person I've ever loved. The girl I loved was an angel, not the parasite that's clinging to my shirt right now. But I didn't have a choice. I was practically forced to leave the girl I love. The girl I loved had beautiful brown eyes that were set in a pale heart-shaped face. The girl I loved had full lips that spoke the kindest and most gentle words. The girl I loved was named Bella.

But I have no right to love her. She deserves someone who is more beautiful and strong. She shouldn't have to deal with my lanky, idiotic self. I want her to love someone that deserved to be loved. So I sent her off to Mike Newton, so that she could be with someone better, though it pains me so every time I see her. But for some reason, I haven't see her with Mike. In fact, I've barely seen her at all. The only time I get a glimpse of her beautiful face is at lunch and biology. The pain of knowing that she isn't mine hurts. Whenever I am in her presence, it takes every bit of self-control I have not to pull her small frame up to my chest and kiss her. I want to kiss her with so much passion that we both would fall to the ground in shock. There is no feeling like her arms around my neck and her lips at my ear, whispering words that made me go weak at the knees.

Jessica removed her lips from my face. My head turned to see Bella standing six feet away with a look between disgust and horror on her face. My lips attempted to produce a sentence or two that will excuse Jessica's behavior. I am quickly silenced when her slimy tongue licks my face like a mutt. My eyes are still glued to Bella, who was running to her truck. She fell two times before her hands touch the door of the rusty truck. Maybe if the licking would stop, I could go help her.

Jessica is still acting like a dog long after Bella's truck leaves the lot. "Jess, stop." I commanded.

"Why, Eddykinz?" she cooed, using my least favorite nickname.

I shook my head. She wasn't Bella, but I could always pretend she was. It would be a lot easier if I imagined she was an angel with beautiful brown eyes. I crushed my lips to hers with a burning passion. My fingers braided themselves in her hair. I frowned; Bella's hair wasn't curly like Jessica's, but this was as close as I would ever be able to get to Bella again.


	8. Chapter 8

Life is possibly the worst form of torture known to man. At least to those who have lost what made it beautiful. Those like me, who are without what they need most. I've been suffering for more than two months now. Art has eased the pain in my chest slightly, but I can still feel the monster clawing at my flesh and ribs. And no matter what I do to try to appease the monster, his growls become louder every moment I suffer.

But no amount of flogging or stabbing could amount to the pain I felt _that _day.

The day I talked to Edward again.

~!~!~!~!~!~

The memories were sharp and clear, like a reflection in the blade of a knife. I remember the day smelling like a quarter you found in an alleyway: bold, salty scents of the other hands that have touched it. The sky was a dull blue (when the clouds would let it show through). Winter had finally decided that Forks was the place to be, and settled down among the tiny houses and narrow streets. Snow was falling in dust-like sheets onto my dirty hair and navy shirt. In other words, it was another monotonous day in Forks.

My foot-steps were slow as I made my way towards the dated building. The shoes I wore had become dirty after so much use, but at that point I didn't care. My clothes were also a bit disheveled and wrinkled after being unmotivated to do the wash. But why look good anyway? The only person who had looked at me with interest lately was Mike Newton, and he wasn't even looking at my face. _Pervert! _I screamed at him in my head.

Though I took time in every movement jut so I wouldn't have to have pain in the next, I was always at school before the teachers even arrived. When free time comes, my thoughts flow freely, giving themselves over to darker topics. So every morning, I sit in the supple leather seats and wait . . . . but for what? I want the grief and guilt away from my eyes, yet they're the things I can't bear to lose. Maybe it's because they're the only things that tie me to Edward anymore. Maybe it's because deep down, I think that feeling pain is better that feeling nothing at all.

But I know I feel something whenever Edward walks by. I feel an exotic vibe resonating from deep within my chest, which somehow even quiets the monster. Maybe it's love. But it couldn't be; I stopped loving two months ago.

Or did I? Did I really banish all of those feeling of trust, yearning, a passion? Or did I simply cover them up with a blank mask?

By the time I came back from the wintry corners of my mind, I had ten minutes until class started. I gathered my books with feeble and weak fingers. I had lost my appetite lately due to . . . . Traumatic events. But I certainly wasn't trying to lose weight. I had never been over-weight, and always a slender girl. Never pretty, though. Except maybe in Mike Newton's eyes. I shuddered again at the thought of his over-eager eyes.

When I entered the classroom, all turned silent. Jessica looked like a lion about to pounce on her prey as she approached me.

"Hey, Bella. There are a some rumors going around that I need to talk to you about. Could we go out in the hall, please?" she asked with a perfect pout.

"Sure, Jess." I answered quickly. Rumors? This wouldn't lead to anything good . . . .

After we were away from the pressing stares of the other students, Jessica turned around quickly. Her eyes had gone from a heart-melting plead to a glare that would make Satan cry.

"Alright, let's talk." I said.

"There's a rumor going around that you went heavy with Edward last night. It better not be true, you tramp, slu-" she growled before I cut her off.

The monster roared within my chest. "Jessica, I haven't had a conversation with Edward in two months. Nothing happened last night." I sighed, exasperated. Who could've started that?

"Oh. Well don't think that because you got off the hook this time, I'll cut you slack the next." she threatened in a whisper, and stomped off. I shook my head sorrowfully. I wanted to be with Edward, but neither of us would have done something like that. Edward was always making sure we didn't rush ourselves. He was of course right. But wasn't he always?

~!~!~!~!~!~

It was biology, and I was of course the first one to take a seat. The rain had progressed from gentle _pit-pats _on the roof to violent slams of water. Leaves dance about in the wind, and were broken apart in its strength. Though the rain rarely stopped in Forks, the weather never seemed so outraged. In some ways, it seemed like an omen for what was to come.

All of the students had filed in, shreds of leaves adorning their hair. Their faces were wet with the rain, which now glimmered in their eyelashes. Compared to me, they all looked like gods and goddesses of the earth. But none of them could be called beautiful when the last person came in: Edward. His hair was even messier, probably due to a certain girl braiding her fingers in it. She also probably put her grubby fingers other places, but that would be a most puke-provoking subject.

"I'm so sorry, sir. I was having trouble with my locker." he said with a look that could melt an iceberg.

"That's quite alright, Mr. Masen. Just try not to do it again." Mr. Banner said with as much warmth.

I looked down at the scratched table top, and wrapped my arms tightly around myself. My breathing became shallow as the gashes in my chest threatened to split me in half. Mr. Banner started speaking, but I couldn't seem to hear him. His words had become bland and mushy, like oatmeal. After giving up on listening, my thoughts turned to the person beside me. I remembered being in Port Angeles with him one night.

"_Edward, at least tell me where we're going." I whined. His warm hands covered my eyes as he pushed me forward._

"_Why would I do that? Then I would miss a beautiful look of surprise on your face." he whispered into my ear. I shivered, but the night was perfectly warm. Instead of complaining, I listened. My feet were walking across an unstable surface, almost like an old brick road. I heard the quiet murmurs of other people around me. Children laughed at jokes that weren't funny, and adults talked of things that the children shouldn't know about._

_I heard the sound of a bell, and the rush of ocean waves became much quieter. We were inside now. Edward lifted his hands from my eyes. It was a small shop that had every inch covered in some sort of colorful fabric._

"_You brought me to a costume shop?" I asked._

"_Yes. Now go try something on; I will, too." he answered._

_My eyes traveled to a 50's swing dress. It was yellow cotton with blue stripes lining the top, dots spotting the flouncy bottom. I grabbed the hanger and went into a dressing room. The dress fit nicely. I stepped out and turned to the dressing room Edward had gone into. He stepped out dressed as a chicken!_

_When I fell on the floor laughing, he said, "Don't laugh at me! I'd like to see you wear a chicken suit with as much pride!" At that I only laughed harder._

"_Fine, I'll put on something idiotic this time." I said when I finally sobered up. This time, I found a clown suit, complete with red nose and orange wig. When I had finally fastened the nose on correctly, I stepped out to find Edward in a toga. He looked like Greek god. _

_His eyes bulged out, and then squirted out tears as he laughed at my present state. "Okay, I guess I deserve it." I said._

"_Yes, yes you do!" he said between laughs. I stepped over and hit him playfully on the arm. _

"_Let's both try not to look like morons this time." I ordered. He turned the other way (still laughing) to find another costume. My eyes immediately found a wedding dress. It had a train that ran about five feet, and was adorned with broken bits of lace. The top half looked like an early 1900's corset, sheer sleeves flowing from it. It was beautiful. My hands frantically grabbed the hanger and pulled it over to the changing room. It took a minute to get on, but was well worth it in the end. I looked as if my wedding was in an hour. I could almost hear the organ._

_I stepped out to see one of the most beautiful things in the world: Edward Mason in a tuxedo. His eyes turned to me, and he stepped closer. His arms found their way around my waist as he whispered, "My bride."_

"Bella, are you okay?" a musical voice asked from next to me. I recognized the voice immediately as Edward's. I realized that class was still in session, and there were tears streaming down my face. My eyes traveled to the angel sitting beside me. His face was clouded with genuine worry and concern. For what? Could he actually be worried about _me_?

"Yeah, I'm fine." I managed to choke out.

"No you're not." he said sternly. "Now tell me what's going on."

"Charlie wants me to go to Florida." I whispered.

"And what's so bad about that?" he chuckled.

"It means I'll be away from home- and the people I love." I whimpered.

"Like Mike, right?" he guessed. I sighed. I had never loved Mike, and never would. But Edward obviously wanted me to be just as happy with someone else as he was. Too bad Mike wanted the same.

"No, not Mike."

"Then who, besides Charlie?" he asked confusedly.

"You, you idiot!" I wanted to scream, but instead bit my tongue.

A look of recognition came into his eyes as he realized of who was left. He now knew that I still loved him; but who didn't? Surely everyone had noticed that I had become catatonic directly after he left me. Even Charlie- oblivious to the absolute extreme- had seen my paintings, and had taken them as a sign of my depression. After doing the painting of the girl in the mask, I had moved onto the other possibilities. Pictures of things like a girl sitting in a circle of candles, bathing in the moonlight. Another was a picture of a person bound by black cords.

For the rest of the class period, I thought of my utmost desires. One would be to not be able to talk; it seems to already have gotten me in enough trouble. Two would be that Jessica Stanley would die. No explanation is needed for that one. Third, it would be that Edward would still love me. I shouldn't have to explain that one either. I imagine his desires are a bit different from mine.

**Chapter End Notes:**

I'm completely in love with it, but it shall do.

Picture time! Wait, GAH! The stupid picture thingy won't work. Dang flabbit gnargles. I will try to post them soon.

I have a proposition for you. If you review my story, I'll read one of yours and review it. Sound good? Now go review!


	9. Chapter 9

**Author's Chapter Notes:**

Yeah, it's another sad chapter. But the beginning is kind of happy. Just a bit. But you have got to trust me with what I do in this chapter. It'll all play out eventually.

Ch. 9 of the Adventures of Bella and Human Boy

Edward's POV

I bit into the white flesh of the apple, bubbly juices dribbling out onto my chin and then traveling down my neck. The taste is one like candy, but a less potent sugar sense. The scent is the same, but very tempting all the same. Funny how fruit can resemble people so closely. My Bella- err, just Bella- is the same. The outside varying in many plain shades, but the hidden fruit is so alluring, so beautiful. Now a forbidden fruit to me. Why was I so moronic, so stupid as to throw away the one thing that completed me? Only now do I realize how rotten I am without her inside the circle of my arms. But now that she is free, Bella is probably happy with another man, one who is worthy to posses the fruit of such a delicious apple.

I open the windows when I reach my large room. Cool air floods the stuffy space, relieving me of a small amount of stress. The sky looks like Bella today also. It's clear and sunny, one of the rarest things ever seen in Forks. Like her soul, it is vast and holds so many beautiful things. The tiny sparrows hopping about the brittle branches of trees, the practically non-existent buds of yellow flowers that attempt to grow tall in the few hours of sunlight, and the sound of people walking in the warmth. Why am I even thinking this? If I was right that day months ago, I don't love Bella. I must be a complete liar, because it could only be love that's making drool drip out of my mouth at the thought of her gorgeous face.

But one thing I am absolutely sure of, is that I'm not the only idiot in this house. I can remember the day as clear as Mr. Varner's infatuation for Ms. Gall. I shuddered at that thought.

"_Edward, can I speak to you in the study?" my father asked in a stern tone._

"_Sure." I answered quickly. I knew that tone of voice; when my father got serious, it meant you better do whatever he told you to do, or there would be dire consequences._

"_What's up, Dad?" I asked lightly._

"_That girl that you've been hanging out with . . . What's her name? Bathilda? Bertha?" he asked, confused._

"_Bella." I replied with warmth in my voice. Just her name made my heart threaten to break through the confines of my chest._

"_Yes. I don't like her. You should stop seeing her." he said suddenly._

"_What?!" I gasped._

"_She doesn't deserve you. And you don't need to be caught up in some fickle romance while you're at law school. Good lawyers don't have scrawny little girls clinging to their arms. So in order to become a good lawyer, you need to get rid of her. And soon." he ordered._

"_But . . . I love her!" I protested._

"_Love?" he scoffed. "She doesn't even deserve to be in your presence!" _

"_I think you've got it backwards, Dad." I shot back._

"_I don't care. Leave her- tomorrow." he commanded, and then left._

_I now hate my father._

My father's life goal seemed to be that I become a successful lawyer. I hate lawyers. They argue with those that don't share the same opinion as them, spit in the faces of those lower than them, and kiss the feet of those above them. My father is one of them.

If I had it my way, I would become neurosurgeon. Helping those who need it, not laughing in their faces. But of course, being a surgeon was a foolish game to my father. Making sore people stay alive? Granting them a couple more years of life? Does that really sound so cruel?

The worst part of him isn't that he's lawyer, it's that he's also an alcoholic. When he thinks I'm asleep, he walks in the front door. Every step is loud and swaggers, and he yells out crude insults at my mother. Though she knows he doesn't mean it, I know part of her has been worn away by all of the trash he's given her. After he passes out on the couch, Mom comes into my room and kisses my cheek lightly. There are always tears on her face.

Did I do that to Bella? I never shouted insults at her, and I never slapped her for no reason, but was I wearing the best of her away? I'd like to say that I didn't grate away the beauty of her, but something tells me I did. I was most definitely the one who got her to this catatonic state. But even in a simplified state of being, I can't help but love her.

But after all I've put her through, Bella would never believe me if I told her of what had actually gone on. I can imagine her staring at me angrily, her lower lip jutting into a perfect pout, tears streaming out of her enraged eyes. How could I hurt her like that again?

I hate my father for making me lose Bella. For everything else, too. But one way or another, she'll be back in my arms.

That last thought came to me as I heard the scream of metal against metal, and then the horrified gasp of my mother.

~!~!~!~!~!~

"Mom? Mom!" I called out in an uncertain, quavering tone. I smelt the ghostly curls of smoke before I saw them. A sickly scent clogged the air and made breathing unwanted: the smell of spilled gasoline. I stepped out of the front door only to have my mother come back through it screaming. Her tiny hands grabbed onto my shirt.

"Edward! Edward!" she shrieked as if I wasn't right in front of her. She was obviously somewhere else. Somewhere where the sky was blanketed in black, and the trees had withered to look like bony fingers.

"Mom, what's going on?" I asked loudly enough to get over her screaming.

"Edward, it's . . . it's your . . . your . . ." she sobbed into my shirt.

A paramedic walked up beside my mother and started rubbing circles on her back to soothe her. His voice low and calm, as if he saw loads of hysterical women every day. Where was dad? He should be the one comforting my mom. And then I saw the two other paramedics. They were holding a mangled form away from what looked like a play toy that was cruelly used. It took me a minute to realize that it was two cars that had wrapped themselves around each other. Glass layered the ground like rain, along with the crimson trail of blood left behind by the paramedics' strange object. Then I realized what had happened.

They were carrying my father. And he was bloody. And not breathing.

**Chapter End Notes: without spaces and fill in (dot) with a period**

Bella's First Painting (the one with the girl in the mask)

H t t p : / / I m g 5 0 8 ( d o t ) I m a g e s h a c k ( d o t ) u s / I m g 5 0 8 / 4 8 1 8 / t h e t o r n m a s k p h 3 ( d o t ) j p g

Bella's picture of the person bound by ropes:

H t t p : / / I m g 5 0 8 ( d o t ) I m a g e s h a c k ( d o t ) u s / I m g 5 0 8 / 1 3 1 5 / a c o m p l I c a t e d w e b t a 5 ( d o t ) j p g

Bella's picture of the person sitting in the candles:

H t t p : / / I m g 5 0 3 ( d o t ) I m a g e s h a c k ( d o t ) u s / I m g 5 0 3 / 2 5 7 3 / s I t t I n g I n t h e c I r c l e o f c a n c q 6 ( d o t ) j p g

Thanks to the masters at deviant art for that!


	10. Chapter 10

**Author's Chapter Notes:**

I bet you all just hate me because of the last chapter and now you'll hate me more. But I have to get this serious stuff out of the way before it can get fun again.

I stared blankly at the open space for a minute, forgetting the pandemonium I stood in. Dead? That wasn't possible. My father can't die. The devil can't die, can he?

I looked around, hoping for something that would take my mind of the bloody corpse. Beside my father's shredded Audi, there was a crumpled truck. It's front looked like a sandwich that had been stepped on. Bits of metal were scattered on the bloody ground and even sticking out of the windshield. The seats inside had been shredded. The top was crunched and caved in, obviously flipping over like my father's car after the impact.

"Hey, there's someone in the other car!" a paramedic screeched. Four paramedics sprinted over to the crushed vehicle. With extreme effort, they wrenched the door open and pulled out a mangled body. The arms and legs were splayed in odd directions, and cuts covering most of the body. They held it carefully and walked over to me.

"Sir, do you know who this is?" they asked me sternly. I looked closer. Brown hair was dripping with blood, and I could tell the skin was pale despite the cuts and bruises. Suddenly I realized exactly who it was: Bella.

~!~!~!~!~!~

The hospital reeks of death. I suppose that would be expected, but you don't realize how strong a odor it is until you experienced it. The potent odor of death is one that is overwhelming. It's the scent of too much peroxide and the choking smell of a rotting oak tree. The scent of lies. People trying to clean them up or start them. I think by now you can grasp the concept.

I ran behind the paramedics. Her face was barely recognizable beneath the scrapes and oozing blood, yet she still managed to be devastatingly beautiful. Once in the intensive care unit with her still body, I stood motionless. This was my fault. I didn't know how, but it was. It's my fault that she's breathing through a tube and being prodded by people that don't even know her name. Nurses in baggy green suits charged at me from all directions.

"Young man, unless you're family, we have to ask you to leave the patient's room." one of the nurses said sternly.

"I am family. I'm her . . . fiancée." I said quickly. Fiancée? Where did that come from?

"Alright. You can stay then." she said. Though there were various assortments of tube and wires running through her nose and mouth, her breathing came in short, quiet gasps. Her usually pale skin was even whiter now, making her look like a corpse. Stitches covered her left arm and right cheek.

"Hello, I'm Dr. Barlow. And you are . . .?" a man said. He was tall and well built, but his face looked as if it had seen too many battles.

"Her fiancée." I finished.

"Yes. I have come to inform you that Ms. Swan will be fine. no paralyzed limbs, and she will be able to walk and talk. But due to severe damage of the head, I'm afraid that most, if not all, of her memory will be gone. Have a good day. I must run." he informed me.

All of her memories? She won't remember her house, Wuthering Heights, even her own father's smile? She won't remember lying motionless in the sun. She won't remember her friends or her family. She won't have anything but the peace of mind in knowing that I never touched her life. When she wakes up, she'll know me as the boy she sits by in biology, not the boy who loves her.

~!~!~!~!~!~

Bella's POV

My eyes flickered open and them quickly slammed shut. Why is it so bright? White light is everywhere. Maybe I'm in heaven. What did I do to get there though?

I felt my eyebrows crease as they opened completely. The place I was in smelled strange. Some rotting smell that completely blots out every other scent. I open my mouth to let out a deep yawn, and it feels like I've been sleeping for half of eternity. The object beneath my head makes a crunching sound as I turn to look around. I must be in heaven. If I wasn't, why would there be an angel beside me? The divine creature has messy hair that sticks up in all directions. I want to touch it . . .

My hands is tugged back down by a cord when it moves to touch the bronze locks. Instead of fighting with it, I turn my head back to the angle. What eyes it has! Lovely emeralds shielded by long, swooping eyelashes. His skin is a creamy ivory that looks just as silky as his hair. His nose is turned up in disgust as if he smells the rotting too.

"Why is your nose crinkly?" I asked him.

He gasped as if my voice was as loud as the crack of thunder. "Bella?"

"Who's that?" I whispered, not wanting to stomp out his velvety voice.

"You." he answered.

"Oh. And who are you?" I asked. Surely this heavenly creature has a name!

"Edward. My name is Edward." he replied.

"Why are you here?" I questioned. I wanted to see his full lips dance up and down in a fixed pattern, and to hear the musical voice come out.

"My father is dead." he whispered. I saw an unidentifiable emotion take over his eyes for a moment, and then disappear.

"I thought God couldn't die." I retorted.

"What?"

"You're an angel, and God created angels, so you're father must be God." I answered as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. But then again, that was the only thing I was even half-way sure of.

"I'm no an angel, Bella. My father is not God. At least not my biological father." he returned.

"Yes you are. You are an angel." I shot back with rough anger.

"No I'm not." he said sternly. He moved closer to me. My eyes became wide and starry at the sight of his body moving so near to mine. "Why don't you go back to sleep, sweetheart." he breathed. His sweet breath tickled my face lightly.

"How do know my heart tastes good?" I said loudly. He laughed a beautiful laugh. It sounded like large wind chimes swaying along with smaller ones, creating a harmonious resonance.

"Just sleep, you silly girl." he chuckled.

"How do you sleep?" I asked confusedly.

He paused and looked at he ground, and then looked back at me. "Close your eyes and listen."

I slammed my eyes shut and strained my hear for the slightest jingle or hum. What came to my ears was a sweet tune. Notes danced about and whispered for me to invite the night in. I obeyed them and let dark rush over me.

~!~!~!~!~!~

(I know some of you guys don't like constantly changing perspectives, but leaving it that short would be evil.)

Edward's POV

She thought I was an angel? I was the farthest thing from that. By founding out the cause of my father's expensive Audi, I knew that I had done this to her.

My father was heading around the corner and attempting to head out onto Calawah road. As he was turning, a heart attack struck him. The paramedics were befuddled by this idea. A man dying of a heart attack at age 54? Then an absolute stroke of genius hit them in the head with a hard knock.

"Did he have any alcohol issues?" they asked warily.

My mother cut in with a sincere smile. "No. He was in fact against alcohol. Deprived the mind of its most valuable knowledge, he would say."

She, more than anyone else, knew how often he was wasted. She also knew that when he was intoxicated, he was mildly violent. I know she hasn't forgotten the slaps and skin twists he gave her repeatedly. It was never enough to injure her, but it still smarted. Though for some, they were killed by their savage husbands; the very people who claimed to have loved them. Had I done this to Bella? I had never beat her, but was leaving her alone the right thing to do? In a couple of weeks, I would find out just how wrong it was.

**Chapter End Notes:**

Would that not suck to lose all of ones memories? Ugh, that would be terrible. But Bella is a strong girl and will find a way to get through it.

Thanks for reading! I love you guys!


	11. Chapter 11

E pov.

When someone leaves you for a higher place, aren't you supposed to feel delighted for them? Aren't you supposed to feel miserable too, but be overcome with a strange sense of serenity? And isn't everything supposed to close with a happy ending?

Obviously not.

If it was supposed to be like that, my mother wouldn't be in hysterics right now.

"Edward, don't take the car! You'll end up like . . . like . . . your . . ." she sobbed. Her eyes were rimmed with red, and her nose had become red and puffy. Seeing her in this state was unnerving. My mother had always been calm. Even in our most hurried moments, she got things done and done right.

"Father?" I finished exasperatedly. At that she only wailed harder. I hated seeing my mother in so much pain, but we had, had this discussion every morning for a month. Never have I crashed or even gotten a ticket. I had to admit that I was a good driver. But with a car like the beautiful one I have, it's hard not to be.

"Mother," I said patiently. "I'll be back soon, and even drive really slowly. You can call me if you need." I spread the words out, almost as if I were talking to a crying toddler. She nodded slowly and didn't protest when I pried her wrinkled fingers from my shirt.

The morning air was heavy with a mixture of fog and tension. The pressure was almost tangible, as if I could reach out and grab it. Streaks of orange and red were splattered across the sky in an almost artful way; no sign of the sun among the brilliant colors, though. Only tiny, unimportant noises reached my ears. The sounds of a mother's shrill order to a child or the constant twitter of a sparrow.

I couldn't help but wonder what coursed through Bella's mind when she heard these sounds. Did she feel confusion at the strange clatter, or become overwhelmed with awe at its novelty? She would have to be reacquainted with every new echo, scene, and touch. Due to her memory loss, her father Charlie had hired a tutor in order for her to relearn her lessons. Jessica had droned for hours yesterday, but finally managed to verbalize some piece of valuable information. She had said that Bella was learning quickly, and could already read simple texts and write a few words. Some knowledge had stayed with her. Jessica had gotten word from Charlie that she still knew her colors and how to draw. She could mix and blend with ease-- not to mention shadowing. Then her topic turned back to shoes.

Also somewhere amidst the drabble, Jessica had wanted me to meet her behind building five. I had hesitated at first. Building five? That was the place where Bella and I had grown to love each other. I had told her there about Maddie, and she had comforted me in my weakest moments. But now that I had had someone stolen from me, I didn't know how I'd get through it without her. I had done well since the crash; only singing her to sleep in the hospital, and a couple of wistful stares when she wasn't looking. She had been like a lost puppy. Searching for the things she had lost, though her memories would never return. The teachers had wanted her to sit in on our classes so that she could still gather information. And even in confusion, she was so angelic and beautiful. Jessica didn't deserve to stand in a place where Bella had been so glorious. None the less, I was still walking towards it.

I felt a pair of vanilla-scented hands cover my eyes.

"Guess who!" Jessica squealed. Oh how I loathed that voice . . .

"Jess." I said shortly.

"Yay! You got it right!" she chirped. "I think you should be rewarded now."

Her tiny hands turned my shoulders around abruptly to face her. In her eyes was a sickeningly devious look. She grabbed my wrist and dragged me over to the back of the building. As soon as she was sure no one could see us, her lips crashed down on mine.

To most, Jessica would seem a good kisser. To me, she's an aggressive mongrel. Her hands uninvitingly roam across my body, and for me to come along for the ride.

She tongue slammed against my bottom lip and demanded entrance. I obliged. But then she did something that crossed a line she had been bordering on for so long: her hands moved to the buckle of my belt and attempted to undo it.

I pushed her away. "No, Jess. I don't want that!" I hissed.

"Oh yes you do." she argued, slamming herself against me. She didn't hesitate to move her hands back to their former position and push her tongue into my mouth.

"Stop!" I commanded, pushing her back a few feet.

"Why, Eddykinz?" she whined.

"Look, Jess, I have a lot of things going on in my life right now, and I don't think I'm ready for that." I said much more calmly. Having that happen right now would make things a lot more complicated. And I simply didn't want to do it with her.

"You're denying me this just because your dad died?" she asked, obviously shocked. "He was a retard anyway. All he ever did was serious stuff, not even having fun like we are. You like fun don't you, Eddie?"

"You think my father was a retard?" I asked, my tone dripping with surprise. My father had never been the pinnacle of kindness, but none the less he was my father.

"Yeah, but who cares? He's dead. I don't think he'd mind if we had some fun." she growled, taking a step toward me.

"Maybe not, but I would." I spat. "Look, Jess, these past months have been . . . interesting, but I-" I was cut off by an angry Jessica.

"Are breaking up with me?!" she shrieked. I nodded. "You ass! Get the hell out of my sight! I never want to you ever again!"

I walked away happily. I had never loved Jessica. I had never wanted to be friends with her. Now that I think about, it I can't even remember why I pretended to at all. Was it to show everyone that I had supposedly move on? I pushed the thoughts out of my mind as I made my way towards a good spot to sit. I'd need some thinking time.

~!~!~!~!~!~

I was glad I had arrived at school almost an hour early. The ordeal with Jessica had taken over twenty minutes. Not only did I have time to think, but to also read. Ever since my first biology class with Bella, I had meant to read _Wuthering Heights _again, just to attempt to see it from her view. My read was going along smoothly. The twists and turns in the book kept me content until I heard a familiar, slimy voice.

"Come here. I want to show you something." Mike Newton said. I heard his voice coming from the back of the building. It was a quiet voice, so I edged closer to the sound. Who was he talking to?

"You'll love this. I just know you will." he said in an attempt to produce a husky voice. My eyes peered around the edge of the brick wall. He was with Bella! She was against the wall, and by the looks of it, afraid of Mike. His face was in a very small proximity to hers, and his hands were already around her waist. They traveled downwards toward the hem of her red shirt.

"Why am I going to do this?" she whispered. She was slumped against the wall, and making efforts to push away Mike's over-eager hands.

"Because you love me, that's why." he purred.

"No I don't!" she protested. His hands were moving farther up her stomach.

"Yes you do, now shut up!" he spat. Bella attempted to fight back, but his hand went over her mouth. Her hands were flailing in the air, trying unsuccessfully to swat mike away. I heard a muffled scream filter through his fingers.

I stepped forward boldly. "Get away from her, you sick creature!" I yelled. Mike froze and his eyes shifted to my enraged face.

"Why should I? She wants this just as much as I do." he said nonchalantly, as if he raped girls all the time. Though you can't help but wonder . . .

I ran forward and grabbed Mike's shirt collar. "If you ever touch her again, I swear to the good Lord that you will die!" I hissed. My fist retracted backwards slowly, and then shot forward at a blinding speed. Blood dripped out of his nose as he howled in pain. His eyes swerved upward to mine, anger shining brightly in his blue irises. "Leave." I spat.

Like a dog that had just been scolded, he hurried off. Bella was lying on her side, shaking. Her face had become even paler. I gently scooped her up from the dirt and cuddled her to my chest. She stopped shaking and looked at me. Though I knew she had lost all of her memory, her eyes held a majestic wisdom. Even in such a frenzied state, I couldn't help but admit that she was the most magnificent thing I had ever seen.

"Do you want me to set you down?" I asked warily. She was probably scared of me now after watching me boil with anger like that.

"No. I know I'm safe with you." she answered. Her voice was smooth and steady.

"How do you know?" I questioned. How could she know she was safe in my arms? For all she knew about me now, she might not know my name.

"Because I know I love you, that's why." she replied. I'm sure I looked shock, because she continued. "I feel like I don't know anything. But I know I love you. I have this one image in my mind where you're in this place with grass and flowers, and you're telling me that you love me. And I feel it, too. The love." she paused. "You do love me don't you? Because after you told me that you loved me, you did this thing with your lips on mine. It was fun!" she chirped. She remembered the meadow?

I chuckled at that last sentence. "That lip thing is called is called a kiss. And yes, I do love you." I mentally slapped myself. _Don't intrude on her life, Edward! You're such a dope. _my conscious screamed.

"I want to try it. The kiss." Bella decided. "Can we? _Please_?" she begged, drawing out the word.

"Are you sure you want to?"

"Yes." she replied. She closed her eyes and gave me power. I leaned in slowly, testing the water. "Shouldn't this go faster?" she whispered. I chuckled and resumed my slow lean. She grabbed my head from the back and pulled my face to hers roughly. For someone who had lost all of their memory, she was not a bad kisser. Her hands played with my messy hair, mine doing the same with her silky hair. It was so soft! My fingers moved to her cheek and stroked the soft skin there. She pulled away, gasping.

"That was . . . amazing." she breathed. "What was that tingling I felt?"

"That, my dear, was love." I explained before she pulled my face back to hers.

**Chapter End Notes:**

I finally get a happy ending out! Took a while, but I did. I hope you guys liked that, but the only way I can know is if you leave a review. *hint hint*


	12. Chapter 12

**Author's Chapter Notes:**

This chapter is kind of boring, but it shows a lot of things that might happen later

_(Continued from the very end of the last chapter. Bella and Edward are behind a building in each other's arms.)_

As I held her in my arms, I started to believe more and more that Bella really did love me. How could an angel such as this pick me? I didn't deserve to look at her soulful eyes through those thick, ebony lashes. I didn't deserve to cup my hand around her soft, silky cheek. And I most certainly didn't deserve to press my lips to her full, luscious ones. I don't know how I survived for so long without her. She's everything.

"Edward, are you okay? Your face looks funny." she whispered.

I chuckled at her choice of words. "Yes." I whispered in reply. "I was just thinking about how I don't deserve you. You're an angel."

She chuckled darkly. "It is I who doesn't deserve you. You know something's wrong with me, but you still love me."

"Nothing is wrong with you.. Sure, you're missing some memories, but you're still perfect." I objected.

"It's not just that memory. I can remember some things, but only a few. I can remember how my mom Renee and I used to sing to the Beatles in her car. And I can remember how to draw. It's like a reflex." she said. "That and the grass place is it, except for pain. I can remember pain. Lots and lots of pain."

I cringed. Surely I hadn't been the cause for such pain! "But the pain is gone right now, correct?" I asked.

"Yes. Now all I feel is love. And a bit of hatred. But only for that guy who was with me before you came." she shuddered. "He was gross."

Once again, I laughed. "Yes he was. But he's gone now. And I'll never leave you-- that is, unless you want me to."

She clung tighter to my chest. "No! Never leave me!" she cried. I saw tears trickle out of her eyes. The sight just about killed me.

"Shh, sweetheart." I soothed. "I'll never leave you. Never. I'll be with you forever." I meant it. I wanted to be with her for every moment of eternity.

At that moment I made a decision: After graduating from college, I would secure her hand in marriage. I loved her, and I wanted her every moment to be amazing with me. We could have a child, and it would be gorgeous just like its mother. Even after our hair turned grey, I would still be able to kiss her wrinkled cheek and say I love her and mean it still. And in our last moments, I would squeeze her hand and say one last 'I love you'.

"Why are you smiling?" Bella said, grinning widely now.

"I was thinking about you." I answered plainly. "You're so beautiful."

"I think you're pretty good looking, too." she murmured into my chest. I pulled my wrist up to my face to check the time. It was 8:10! If classes begin at 8:15, we needed to move quickly.

"Bella, I hate to ruin the moment, but we kind of need to go." I said, interrupting the peace of the morning.

"Okay. You can set me down on the grass then." she said softly. I turned to see her face clouded with worry. Once again she looked like a lost toddler. "You don't have first hour with me." she whimpered.

"I know. But I will be with you in second hour." I soothed.

"'kay. I better go then. I love you!" she perched up on the tips of her toes and pressed her lips to mine. For a moment, I stayed there, melting in the feeling of her soft lips on mine. I pulled back, not wanting to lose myself and end up being _very _late for calculus.

"I love you, too." I whispered against her lips. She walked away, still smiling at me over her shoulder.

~!~!~!~!~!~

I've never found calculus to be especially riveting, but I found myself struggling to concentrate on even the smallest and most simple problems. How could you blame me? The thought of Bella sitting alone in English scared me, though her private mentor had said she was learning remarkably fast in that subject. For someone who had lost all memory of over ten years of school, being able to read third-grade context was pretty amazing. But still, her sitting in a class with people whose names she can't even remember could be pretty dangerous.

The shrill call of the bell signaled for us to move to our next class. I scrambled to grab my books and shot out the door before everyone had gotten out of their chairs. The run from building three to building five took only a few seconds, yet I couldn't go fast enough. Students shot angry glares as I pushed past them quickly. When I entered the classroom, I sat down and looked around quickly. Where was Bella?

Other students filed in, chattering about some news that there was a kid looking for revenge, and then looking at me. I didn't have time to process the information because Bella walked in. Her hair swished about her face, touching her pale cheek lightly. A light blush touched the apples of her cheeks, probably from the fresh chill of the morning. She glanced up and caught me staring, making her blush become more evident. I opened my arms widely for her to come into. After setting down her books, she obliged.

"How was English?" I murmured into her ear. I felt a shiver run down her spine.

"It would have been better if you were there. But I guess I shouldn't complain. I could be a lot unluckier and not have you in any of my classes." she sighed and then shuddered. "That would be terrible!"

"I agree, my love." I nuzzled my nose into her ear. "We should make the most of our time." My lips moved from her ear to her cheek, and slowly I started kissing down until I reached the corner of her lips. At that point, she had obviously grown impatient and kissed me fiercely. Her lips were hungry and had a desperate drive to them now. I felt my fingers unconsciously climb into the locks of her hair, trying to secure her to me forever. Unfortunately, breathing is vital to humans. If only there was some way I didn't have to . . . But that was by no way possible. I was stupid for even thinking that it was.

"I better get out of your lap, shouldn't I?" Bella whispered against my lips.

"Yes, I think you should." Mr. Banner growled through clenched teeth. Bella jumped in surprise and looked up.

"Whoops!" she muttered. Her face had gone from a delicate blush to a all-the-blood-in-your-body flush. I'm sure my face wasn't crimson to that degree, but I might have been a tad bit red in the face.

"I was thinking about maybe an hour after school with me. How does that sound to you, you little lovebirds?" Mr. Banner fumed. "Or would you rather me tell your parents?" he suggested.

"After school!" Bella and I barked at simultaneously.

"Actually, Mr. Cullen and Ms. Swan will be with me after school." a high, nasally voice objected. Everyone turned to see a stout woman with bushy red hair that was adorned with barrettes that looked like cats. Her nose was turned up so high that I think I could have looked up her nostrils. On her scrunched face there was an excess of make-up and glittery black glasses hanging on the tip of her nose. Her chubby frame was clothed in an ugly green dress. Hanging of the shoulders was a piece of cloth with tacky fringe. Who was this?

"Oh really? Well, I suppose you could take them instead." Mr. Banner agreed reluctantly. "Do you need them now?"

"Yes I do. If they could follow me to the office." the bizarre woman said. I stood up with Bella and walked hesitantly to the door. I snaked my arm around her shoulder. The woman turned around and cried, "Ah ah ah! No touching!" I dropped my arm.

The office smelled like the dentist's office. Over-bearing scents of bubblegum and mint mixed with smiles that looked processed and fake. After leading us past multiple dusty, plastic plants, the woman turned to us and pointed a doorway. I filed in and stood by an oak desk. The room looked like it had been attacked by some angry civilization of lace creatures. But there was even more pink than lace!

"I'm Mrs. Sumner. I need you all to stay here in my office while I go get Mr. Newton." she said. Newton? As in Mike Newton? Oh crap. I have a feeling it has something to do with the punch I gave him this morning. The moronic boy probably squealed and ran to the office like a third-grader. Probably to show Bella that he was a 'good guy' on the inside. Okay, whatever, Mike

Sure enough, Mike walked into the room. What was different from him earlier was the fact that there was a blue and purple blob in the middle of his face. Did _I _do that to his nose?! Underneath the bruised mass, there was a grimace directed towards me. Mrs. Sumner swept in the door dramatically, her ugly dressing swaying back and forth.

"Mr. Cullen, I understand that you have caused this unfortunate injury upon Mr. Newton. What do you have to say for yourself?" she accused.

"How do you know it was me? Mr. Newton," I mused, calling Mike by his formal name. "could have easily ran into a wall, or even simply fallen onto hard ground."

"You know you did it, Cullen!" Mike Spat furiously.

"Now, now, Mr. Newton. Let's not get angry. Mr. Cullen does have a point. But we can't know unless there were witnesses, we can't make any accusations." Mrs. Sumner said calmly.

Bella finally found her voice. "I was a witness." she announced. Mrs. Sumner turned her eyes expectantly towards Bella. Mike looked pleadingly at her, but she only averted her eyes, letting them rest on me. "Mike was with me this morning. We were behind building three when he . . . he attempted to, err, rape me." she sighed, then continued. "Edward came in the nick of time and fought Mike off. Just like a guardian angel." She rested her head against my shoulder lovingly and let out a breath of sweet air. I buried my nose in her hair and breathed in the lovely scent that she gave off.

Mrs. Sumner's bubblegum pink lips were hanging open in shock. She blinked quickly, and then refocused her gaze on Bella. Bella however looked completely at ease. Her back was resting against her chair and her hands were neatly folded in her lap. Mike looked about the same as Mrs. Sumner, but also in the shock was a strong current of fear. His bottom lip trembled and his eyebrows turned up in an attempted look of an angelic innocence. Mrs. Sumner turned to him with raw, untamed anger aflame in her eyes. Her jaw went from slack to clenched. Mike stood up out of the chair and tried to run out of the office, but was cut short by Mrs. Sumner's sharp order.

"Mike Newton! Get back here! I'm going to call your parents, and then I'll-" she growled before I pushed Bella out of the office.

I already had an escape plan in my mind. Bella and I tiptoe silently out of the office and look around warily. When a possible witness to our escape walks by, I pull Bella down and we army crawl toward the door, staying clear out of the bystander's eyesight. Upon arrival at the door, we walk out and run blindingly fast towards my car. After the engine of my beloved Volvo is purring, we speed out the parking lot. My hands grip the handle tightly and Bella's eye's rest on the muscles in my arms. Her eyes rest on mine with a burning desire and I pull over. I turn to her and place my lips on hers. I feel her tiny hands running through my hair, and mine do the same to her silky locks. Her tongue lightly traces my lips . . .

"Cullen, get back here! Just because you did the right thing doesn't mean you aren't in serious trouble!" Mrs. Sumner barked.

We ushered ourselves back into the room and closed the door. Mike now had a red hand mark on his cheek that went lovely with the blue and purple blob. Mrs. Sumner had turned a shade of raging crimson, and her hands were clenched into tight fists. My hold on Bella's waist tightened when I saw her in this furious state. Where was that calm state of being she was in earlier?

"I'll be calling your mother, Mr. Cullen. As for you, Mr. Newton, well, that's a totally different matter. I'll hang you by those big ears from the ceiling! And once they've fallen off, I'll hang you by your ankles for so long that your face will be permanently red." Mrs. Sumner cried. She turned to Bella and I. "You may go, but I will expect you back immediately after school." There was that calm manner!

Bella walked out slowly, as if expecting to be called back in for being a bad little girl. In all of the commotion, two hours had passed. I walked her to her 4th hour Spanish class, and paused in front of her.

"I won't see you until lunch. Can I have a kiss so that I won't feel as bad?" I asked Bella, putting on a puppy-pout.

She giggled. "But of course." she laughed. I looked down towards her full, lustrous lips and brought my face towards her. When our skin touched, the world exploded. My nerves sizzled and sparked, my mind getting a dizzy, but lovely, feeling. The effect she had on me was amazing. Suddenly the warmth of her lips was gone, and a smile danced lightly on them.

"Why'd you pull away?" I pouted.

"I wouldn't want to keep us out here all day, Mr. Cullen!" she guffawed. She leaned closer to my ear, letting her breath flow out onto my skin. "Besides, there will be plenty of time for kissing later." she murmured silkily.

~!~!~!~!~!~

The final call of the bell left me terrified. My steps were slow and purposefully, almost a trudge. But I finally had to enter the office, and was surprised by the reaction I got.

"Edward!" my mother shrieked. "Why did you punch that boy? Do you need medication? Let's get you medication! If you're angry you should always talk it out, never punch it out! Maybe you need a therapist, too. I can get you a therapist, need be. Do you want a therapist? I bet you do. And about the medication, oh! Do you really need it? There are tons of pills for kids with anger issues like you. But its okay . . ." she babbled, to which I eventually stopped listening. I cut in though, not wanting her too carried away with her ideas.

"Mom! Breathe. Just breathe." I instructed. I took a breath myself, as an image for her to follow. She sucked in a gulp of air, and then let out a _whoosh. _"Good. No, I don't need medication. He was trying to hurt Bella. I had to get him away so that Bella would be alright." I talked slowly, making sure that her careful mental balance wasn't corrupted. Mrs. Sumner flashed me a glance that said 'I don't think it's you who needs the medication'.

"Mr. Cullen. By injuring Mr. Newton, I will have to have you serve detention on Saturday morning. You and Mr. Newton will be here until you work out your differences."

I sighed. An afternoon with Mike Newton. This ought to be just peachy.

**Chapter End Notes:**

Did you like it? Hate it? Tell me your thoughts about this chapter


	13. Chapter 13

**Author's Chapter Notes:**

This chapter isn't very long, but it shows what happens on that fateful day of detention with Edward and the almost rapist (Mike). DUN DUN DUN!

Mrs. Sumner was kind enough to grant me the permission of coming to school today to "work out my differences" with Mike Newton. Translation: I have detention on a Saturday and am being forced to say nice things to Mike Newton. Though I will suffer during this time, it's worth it. By punching Mike and being punished, I saved Bella from Mike and his wretched intentions. He wanted to strip her of her dignity and innocence, and all for his pleasure. If it meant she stayed safe, I would spend years in this purgatory.

The budding shrubbery and trees in the front yard of the school was a wonderful farewell gesture. I think I could possibly explode in frustration if I attempt to settle things with Mike, so it's nice to have one of the last things I see be the beginning of spring. Along with the specks of green in the bushes, the windows of the classroom windows were all open, spurts of giggles and moans floating out. What was going on in there? Amidst the disturbing sounds, birds sang gleefully and children laughed. Even the sun was shining! To most, this would have been one of the most gorgeous days of the year, but those people don't have to be without their soul mate for hours at a time.

Mrs. Sumner's daunting figure appeared at the door. "Do you plan to stand there all day, Mr. Cullen?" she huffed.

"No ma'am." I said, keeping my tone polite and free of the rude thoughts going through my mind. If I got a chance to really open my mouth, I'd be here for more than one Saturday.

I recognized the hallway we were walking down as the senior hallway, and the classrooms it held. I went down this row of lockers everyday to get to my advanced chemistry class. A few of the seniors had become friends. Mrs. Sumner stepped aside and gestured to a metal door much like the others in the hallway. Inside the cramped classroom, Mike Newton sat fuming at some unknown force.

"Hello, Mr. Newton." I managed to say politely.

He grunted in response.

"I'll leave you two to settle out your differences. If you need any words of guidance, I'll be nearby." Mrs. Sumner said. Translation: If you guys start beating each other up, I'll be standing outside the door.

I nodded in reply and walked slowly over to Mike. His hands were clenched tightly into fists, and his eyes were shut closed. I swear I saw steam come out of his ears.

"How the hell do you suppose we 'work out our differences'?" I questioned harshly. Mike and I had never been the best of buddies, but never before like this where we so malicious.

"I take Bella. You can have Jessica and I get her. Everyone's happy!" he propounded.

I was sure my mouth was hanging open in shock. Give up Bella? For this stupid imp? "No! She's mine!" I hissed, and then added more gently, "I love her, and she loves me."

"When you took her that day did you not see her and I? She was mine, and still is. She's just so sexy!" he gushed.

"Don't talk about her like that! She wasn't your girlfriend, she was your toy. You're just too much of a disgusting creature to realize it."

"I realized that she love me! She wanted what I was about to give her as much I did." he roared.

"Then why was she crying?" I fumed. It hurt me to see Bella crying. Such an innocent creature shouldn't be hurt so badly that tears fall. I would do anything to make sure that she never cries again.

All of the sudden there was a throbbing ache in my stomach, and I was half-way across the room. I realized that Mike had punched me. Hard.

I stood back up quickly and charged over to where he was standing. My hand went into a hard ball, and swung towards Mike's jaw. I heard nothing snap after the hard impact, but how do I wish I would have. To know that Bella's pain had been avenged would have been the most desirable victory. Sadly, Mike was able to get up and throw a blow into my stomach again. I hissed in pain, but brought my hand up to meet his face again.

"Boys!" shrieked Mrs. Sumner. "Stop, you barbarians!"

We froze and turned our eyes toward the enraged woman. She continued with, "Now I want you two to stop fighting and hug."

"What?!" both of us screamed.

"You heard me. Now hug!" she ordered in a voice that made me think of an army officer. We sighed and reluctantly stepped forward. I wrapped my arms around Mike. His arms went around my back and we pulled back.

"Ah ah ah!" she snapped. "You'll be hugging until you can say something nice to each other."

We repositioned ourselves back into a hug and sighed angrily. This could take quite a while.

After about five minutes, I took a deep breath and began with my false compliments. "You have good hair, Mike."

"You have a hot girlfriend, Edward." he chuckled. I stiffened. I could practically hear his disgusting thoughts about what he would do to Bella if he got the chance. The sick monster!

"Have you said kind things yet?" Mrs. Sumner prodded.

"Yes." Mike and I answered.

"Alright. You're free to go then." she said. I ran out of the room and down the hall, wanting to be out of the presence of those disagreeable creatures. The lockers flew past me quickly as I fled from more possible punishment. A beautiful sight met me at the front door. Her hair swished lightly around her heart-shaped face, complete with a dazzling smile.

"Did you have fun?" Bella giggled. I grabbed her around the waist and pulled her over to our spot.

Instead of answering immediately, I pressed my mouth to hers. She was surprised, but responded. My hands moved up to her hair and started playing with the silky locks. Her fingers climbed up to the back of my neck. Using the tips of her fingernails, she rubbed tiny circles on my skin. I was going insane with pleasure. My tongue lightly flicked her bottom lip, pleading for entrance. Happy to oblige, she gladly let me in. Our lips moved in foreign ways, and made my nerves dance beneath my skin.

We pulled back, gasping. "It certainly wasn't as fun as that!" I panted. She laughed.

"So what's on the agenda for today?" Bella asked, also breathless.

"After I shower, I'm going to take you somewhere." I answered.

"Why do you need to shower?" Bella cocked her head to the side, confusion evident on her beautiful face.

"Love, I was just hugged a man that attempted to rape you. I believe a shower is in order." I answered.

Her mouth popped in an 'o' and she grabbed me around the waist, trying to walk toward the Volvo. I felt her elbow rub against my stomach, and I hissed in pain.

"Are you okay, Edward?" she prodded. Her tiny fingers lifted up the hem of my shirt, examining my stomach. I saw a growing blue spot in the middle. "Well, the bad side is that your bruise is about the size of an ape. The good side is that you have amazing abs." she complimented.

I chuckled. "Thank you, sweetheart. For such a sweet compliment, you deserve a reward." I said. I caught my mouth in hers, reveling in her lovely taste. She was so tempting, but I don't think she realized how alluring her eyes were; how those full lips could draw in men like fish to a worm. She pulled away laughing.

"Come on, lover boy. Let's get you a shower and some aspirin." she said.

**Chapter End Notes:**

Poor Edward! Maybe if I kissed the bruise it would feel better. ;)


	14. Chapter 14

The gentle hum of the engine stopped when I put on the brakes in front of Bella's house. She turned her gorgeous brown eyes on me, and I noticed that they were clouded with fear. I cupped her cheek in my hand and began stroking her face. Such soft skin she has . . .

"What's wrong?" I asked her. Seeing her in such a worried state unnerved me.

She hesitated, but then said, "News goes around Forks pretty quick. I have a feeling that Charlie might not want to you with me because he heard about you punching Mike, even if it was because you were protecting me. He could say something you being a bad kid and then not letting us see each other. It's just a feeling, but-"

I lowered my lips to her ear. "Even if he forbids me from ever seeing you again, that certainly won't stop me. I'll be with you every minute possible," I whispered. She grinned and pressed her soft lips to my cheek for one second, then hopped out of the car cheerfully. Once at the porch steps, she turned and puckered her perfectly full lips, blowing me kiss. I ran out of the car at the fastest speed I could muster and grabbed her divine face in my hands. Passion emanated out of my every pore as I kissed her, my lips moving in rough, fervent movements. Her delicate hands traced lightly over my face and seized fistfuls of my hair. My hands cupped her cheek and stroked the silky skin. From my face to the back of my neck, Bella's fingers were making an exquisite feeling flow through my veins by rubbing my skin with her fingernails. She let out a soft sigh, making my desire swell dizzyingly. We broke apart, gasping for some much-needed air.

"Mr. Masen, what was that for?" she gasped in a fake state of appall.

"I'd rather kiss you for real." I whispered against her skin, diving back into her full lips.

I heard someone clear their throat very loud and conspicuously, and turned to see Charlie standing in the door with his arms crossed. "Hello, Edward. I'm Mr. Swan," he grunted. He glared at us, and I realized that Bella's hands were still in my hair, and my hands were still clinging to her waist. I disentangled us quickly, seeing Bella's face turn five brand new shades of red.

"Nice to meet you, sir," I said politely. I put my hand out for him to shake, but he simply glanced down at it and ignored the gesture. His eyes narrowed angrily at me.

"Did you have a . . . _fun_ afternoon?" he said, addressing Bella this time. With the way he stressed the word 'fun', I could easily tell he thought we had been groping behind a building.

"Yes," Bella said quietly.

Charlie smiled at her and turned to frown and say (more along the lines of snarl) to me, "I heard you got a detention, Masen."

I dropped my eyes to the ground, letting shame take over my body. "Yes, sir," I murmured.

"You listen here," Charlie growled. "I don't want my little girl hanging around any juvenile delinquents! So if you plan to keep up this criminal beha-"

"Dad!" Bella snapped, interrupting his rant. "You don't even know why he was in detention, so don't accuse him of anything. You were about to tell him what a bad person he was, when he was only in detention because he was protecting me."

"From who?" Charlie scoffed.

"Mike Newton. He tried to, err, injure me," she answered without hesitation. His jaw dropped and his eyes bugged out so far that I thought they'd fall out.

"Mike Newton?" cried Charlie once his jaw was up.

"Mike Newton," she said again.

"Bella, honey," Charlie said, his mood changing from shocked to understanding. "I know you've been through a lot these past months, but now is not the time to lie just so that your criminal friend won't get hurt."

"I'm not lying about what Edward did! He's a good person, dad. He's loving, smart, funny, clever, and he cares about me," she protested. I felt warmth spread throughout my palm as Bella slipped her hand in mine. I gave it a gentle squeeze of reassurance.

"Why don't you get inside, Bells?" Charlie said, ignoring what she said before. "I want to chat with Edward."

When Bella glanced at me, I nodded to signal that she could leave. Once he heard the click of the door, Charlie turned to me. His slightly hairy hands were clenched into tight fists and his eyes were shut tightly.

"If you ever come near this house while my daughter is in it again, I will castrate you!" Charlie managed to growl through clenched teeth. "Better yet, never come near her again. Never. Again," he barked, enunciating each syllable.

"But sir, if you could give me a minute to-" I started to explain.

"NO!" Charlie bellowed. "Now leave my property!"

I hurried to my car, not wanting to anger him anymore. Instead of speeding off, I settled for a normal pace so that my arrival back at the house wouldn't some so soon. My thoughts crashed and collided with each other. Throughout the whole conversation with Charlie, it was all I could do to not start screaming at him that he was doing this wrong.

"But I love her!" I wanted to shriek in his face. "And she loves me!" Err, I hope . . . Either way, I love Bella and want to spend every minute of the rest of my existence with her. And somehow, I'd get Charlie to let me.

~!~!~!~!~!~

"Good morning, Edward," Bella said cheerfully. Strands of brown hair clung to her pale cheeks, wet from the ever persistent rain. Since the crash, she had no car, and since last Saturday, she had no ride. But though six days ago Charlie had banned me from ever seeing or interacting with Bella again, we hadn't stopped. She was like some sort of drug that I couldn't get off of. So alluring and addictive she was. I was always surprised that she didn't realize it. How could someone so angelic and kind not see themselves that way?

"Hello, beautiful," I murmured into the crook of her neck, breathing in the flowery scent of her skin. I felt her giggle.

"You certainly know the way to greet someone. I feel right at home, and I'm in only in front of the school," she laughed.

"If you feel at home when I do that, you'll never want to leave once I do this." My lips caught hers in a passionate kiss, every single pore exhaling desire. After firmly planting my hands on her waist, she deepened the kiss, her tongue gliding perfectly over my bottom lip. My knees felt weak, almost like I couldn't sustain the passion.

From behind me I heard a very conspicuous clearing of a throat. When I took my lips of Bella, I turned to see Mike Newton with an angry look on his face.

"She's still mine, you know," he hissed, looking at Bella with, not love, but raw, disturbing lust.

"Leave. Now!" I growled at him, pulling Bella close to my side, making sure that Mike couldn't see or get to her.

"You think you're so amazing. With your hair and eyes and clothes. And everybody says to be nice to Masen because his retard of a father died," Mike whined.

"My father was no retard!" I shouted, steeping towards Mike.

"You know he was, Masen. Word on the street is that you're mom is loopy and hooking up with any guy she can get. Rumor is that so far she's hooked up with Bella's dad, too," he announced smugly.

"Listen here, you stupid heathen!" Bella snarled. "Edward's father was no imbecile, and his mother is no prostitute! I suggest you leave before I finish breaking the rest of your face."

Mike's eye grew wide with fear before he scampered off like a dog that had done something naughty, muttering something like 'hot, but crazy'.

I turned to Bella, a proud grin emerging on my face. "Would you care to show me what we were doing before being to rudely interrupted, my lady?"

"Why of course, good sir. I believe we were just about here." she growled playfully, leaning into my lips once again. The weak feeling came back, so I broke the kiss momentarily to press her against the brick wall. Her delicate hands gripped my shoulders, pulling me forward. My hands played with her silky locks as my tongue moved up and down the length of her lips.

"ISABELLA MARIE SWAN." yelled someone from behind me.

Assuming it was Mike, I hissed angrily, "Mike, get out of here! I have business to finish with Ms. Swan here. Kissing is an art, my friend, so therefore you should not interrupt my practicing."

"Maybe I should practice my punches." the voice shouted again. I looked up to see none other than our beloved Charlie.

"Oh." was all I managed to choke out.

"Bella-- car. Masen-- Siberia." he commanded.

Being the brilliant problem-solver I am, I was only able to squeak out, "Oh crap."

~!~!~!~!~!~

Anyone remember the life lessons figures on TLC? The tiny statues with random people in awkward situations that say things like, 'If he wants you to be his mom, you don't want to be his girlfriend.' They're all colorfully painted and have mildly entertaining saying that will supposedly help you fight through life. If they had actually gone on the market, there would have been a chance that there would have been some money made. Helpful and catchy; who wouldn't want that? What TLC never included was the lesson about not making Charlie Swan excruciatingly mad.

Because he can shout. Loudly.

After ushering Bella into the car, Charlie turned towards me with an fuming, red face. "Did I not tell you to stay away from my daughter?" he spat into my face.

"Yes." I squeaked.

"So why did I see you two getting so touchy-feely over there?"

"I- I love her." I said quietly.

"You love her?!" Charlie screamed. "You're a kid! You don't know what love is! This is just a stupid crush that you both will get over! You're just using her as a toy in some sick game that you enjoy playing. She's only entertainment for you."

I gasped. "Entertainment?!" I shrieked just as loudly. "Bella is everything to me! I need her, and want to be with her forever!"

"Do you really mean that, Edward?" Bella asked quietly from behind Charlie.

"Get in the car!" Charlie barked at her.

Ignoring him, I answered truthfully, "Yes." She ran forward and hugged me tightly, only to be wrenched away by her father.

"Isabella, I said to get in the car!" bellowed and angry Charlie. She narrowed her eyes at him and then walked off.

"As I was saying, stay away from her. Your groping and kissing won't help her at all! She has a fresh mind and I would rather you not corrupt her. I want her to start off with love and being cherished. I can do just that."

"You call that cherishing?" I protested, referring to him practically dragging her to the car. Cherishing was gentle, intimate touches, not pushing and shouting. If that's what he called love, I was scared about what he called discipline.

"I actually love her." Charlie defended. His eyes were bulging out so far that I feared they might fall out of their sockets.

"Mr. Swan, I don't know if you understand-"

"NO! It's you who obviously doesn't understand. If you did understand, then you would realize that you should stay away from Bella!" he screeched. With that, he stomped off unhappily to his car. Before he closed the door and drove off, he added, "And if you really love her, you'll stay away!"

**Chapter End Notes:**

I don't why, I just have a thing for bashing Charlie. He irks me and I have no idea why.

I won't beg, but I really do love it when you review. They just make my day so much nicer. :)


	15. Chapter 15

**Author's Chapter Notes:**

I know, it's a shortie, but it's better than nothing, right?

Bella squeezed my hand as we walked into Government quietly. She smiled warmly up at me, sending tingles down my spine. When I leaned in to peck her on the cheek, some so rudely interrupted.

"Ah ah ah, Mr. Masen! Ms. Swan's father has told all of the staff to keep an eye on you two, and make sure that you don't interact what so ever. Therefore I suggest you step away from the girl quickly, or you'll be given a detention. And disobeying your police chief is punishable by law!" Mrs. Sumner ordered. Touching? Punishable by law? I have reason to believe that that is far from the truth.

I groaned and then reluctantly pulled away from Bella.

"That's better," Mrs. Sumner chirped, trotting off like the happy secretary she was.

"I utterly loathe my father," Bella hissed.

"Don't say that. One day, you'll regret it," I murmured somberly.

"Oh, I didn't mean to bring that up, Edward. I'm sorry!" Bella cried, blushing a furious shade red.

I grabbed her around the waist and buried my face in her warm neck. "It's alright, love. I know you didn't."

"Masen, Swan, no physical contact!" Mr. Tucker barked at us. I sighed and pulled away from Bella _again. _

"Thank you," he said. I slid into my chair quietly, sulking at the fact that I couldn't touch my Bella. I heard the loud squeak of Bella's chair being pulled out next me. When I looked up she had her arms crossed and lower lip jutting out. I couldn't help but realize how beautiful she was, even when pouting. The way her eyes darkened under her pulled-down eyebrows was undeniably tempting.

"Edward, it's not polite to stare," Bella scolded, embarrassed. A smile danced across her lips. I grinned sheepishly and turned to stare at the board for the next 45 minutes. Even though I can't touch her at all, Bella and I can get through this day together.

~!~!~!~!~!~

I am sick and tired of this crap about not being able to touch my girlfriend.

It's taken all I have not to spring up and kiss Bella so fiercely that we fall back, astounded by the passion in the air that we've created. After we would get over our shock, she would turn to me with the most devious smile playing around her face, beckoning for me to grab her. So I would do just that. Once my arms were secured around her thin waist, my lips would gain a mind of their own, kissing her neck in ways foreign to me. Her head would fall back, her brown locks cascading down her back. Though students would stare and the teacher would shout, our displays of passion would go on and on and on . . .

"Earth to Edward," Bella murmured, waving her hand in front of my face. "Err, Edward, are you there?"

"Huh?" I grunted, breaking out of my fantasy.

"So glad that you could join us, Mr. Masen," the teacher said through clenched teeth.

"Forgive me, sir. I didn't get a good night's rest," I lied politely.

Bella sat beside me, her eyes darting quickly between the teacher and I. Once again, I was caught in the beauty of her glowing brown orbs.

"Mr. Masen, I suggest you pay attention to the lesson, and not Ms. Swan," the teacher ordered.

A small bit of warmth flooded my face, but it was nothing to the full-blown flush Bella had. Underneath the desk, I reached for her hand. Once it was secure in mine, I sighed contentedly. The warmth was nourishing to the pain I had felt prior, and soothed my aching head. Though she was near me, there the throbbing tick of my pulse, reminding me that this wasn't allowed, and that I was twisting the rules.

Boy, did being bad feel so, so _good_!

~!~!~!~!~!~

Final Hour- Friday

The final bell screeched loudly, sending the students into a frenzy of excitement for the weekend to come. I couldn't help but share their excitement, thinking of how far away Bella and I would be from the school faculty. No one to tell me that I could stroke her cheek, hold her, or even give a chaste kiss on the cheek.

"What are you smiling about?" Bella asked, a grin spreading across her own face.

"The fact that no one can tell me that I can't be with you this weekend. It's only our rules now." I smiled, thinking that we could spend all of the 56 hours with her. Sure, you'd have to take out sleep, but that still left a lot of time, right?

"I'm glad it's the weekend. I think I would have shot Mrs. Sumner if she told me one more time that I couldn't kiss you," she scowled, thinking of the stout red head.

She grabbed my hand, squeezing it tightly. "Come on. Let's blow this popsicle stand." Now grinning, she practically dragged me out of the school doors. I was greeted with the biting air of February, occasional snowflakes melting on my nose. The sky was a thin sheet of soft gray clouds, little sunshine able to pierce through. A few birds braved the harsh cold, flying diligently in search for a meal. I was amazed at the way they were able to concentrate so well, even with their stomachs empty and growling. Their stamina was truly amazing.

"Let's go to our place," I suggested, loving the feel of the words on my tongue.

Bella smiled lovingly, and then nodded. We walked there in a peaceful, relaxing silence. I wished I had something to say; something romantic or kind, but I could find no words.

As always, the back of building five looked the same: secluded, over-grown grass, and dense shadows. But what was definitely not the same was the moaning couple. They were laid out on top of each other, hands flitting around and grabbing things that shouldn't be grabbed. Truthfully, it was one of the most disturbing things I had ever had the privilege to lay eyes on. When I turned, Bella had the same disgusted look.

"You do know who that is, right?" Bella asked at a normal volume, though it was hard to hear over the couple's noises.

"No, but - wait! Is that . . ." I gasped, pointing towards the entwined pair.

"Jessica Stanley and Mike Newton," she finished, but took a step back when the couple stopped at the sound of their name. Mike's mouth hung down I shock, while Jessica merely looked indifferent. They were still a tangle of limbs and wrinkled clothing, though were now trying to get up.

"Well, uh, this is awkward . . ." Mike frowned.

"So? They saw us making out? What the big deal, Mikey?" Jessica scoffed. "Well, maybe it's a problem for Edward. He's afraid of touching people. Isn't that right, Eddykinz?" I scowled, thinking of that day.

"What is she talking about?" Bella asked, her eyebrows furrowing.

"Come on, Jess. Let's go back to my place instead." Mike suggested.

"M'kay," she chirped, and then stopped, a devious smile lighting her face. "Actually, Mike, I need to speak to you." She turned to blow a kiss directly at me, and then towed Mike off to her car.

I turned to Bella, glad that we were finally alone. "If you'll forgive me, there's something I have been _dying _to do all day."

She barely had time to be confused before I took her face in my hands, bringing my lips to hers. My lips were moving in excited, fervent ways. Strange tingles and tickles were creeping up my spine, sending my mind into a delighted frenzy. I felt Bella gasp against my lips, her hands locking themselves around my neck. In a spurt of great strength, I broke off, breathing heavily. Bella's soft lips moved down my neck, sensations of desire raging throughout my body. Even though it had only been a few seconds (if that), I already missed the delicate feeling of them on mine. I caught her mouth in mine again, savoring the feeling of her silky skin. Abruptly, the mood of our kiss changed. The rhythm of our lips had changed to a slower, more delicate tune. Instead of seizing fistfuls of hair, Bella only ran her fingers gently through its length. My hands became kinder, wrapping around her waist lovingly. I relished the moments I spent kissing her, and even simply in her presence. If there is a God out there, he must really love me.

Bella's lips broke off of mine, taking in large amount of air. "I love you," she whispered, snuggling into my chest. "Please tell me you feel the same."

"I'll always love you, Bella. I'll love you until the day I die," I stated truthfully, burying my face in her strawberry-scented hair.

"Oh, really? I suspect that that day will be very, very soon," someone snarled furiously. I turned to see - what a surprise! - Charlie Swan.

And standing behind him was Jessica, another devious smile on her face.

Oh joy. Another yelling match.


	16. Chapter 16

This would not work. There is no way it could even help at all, but I had to try it. If I didn't, there was a chance that I would be banned from seeing Bella, and I needed more time.

"Run," I murmured almost silently into Bella's ear. She turned to me in shock.

"Run?" she hissed quietly back. Her face was clouded with disbelief. I didn't blame her - mine was probably the same.

"Yes. Wait for when I say 'go'." I reached for her small hand, counting down in my mind.

3 . . .

2 . . .

1 . . .

"GO!" I barked, dragging her along with me. I had always been a fair runner, pushing ahead further than the others on the playground blacktop. Five years now I had been in track, always earning praise from the coaches.

I looked behind me to make sure that we weren't anywhere close to being caught. Charlie simply stood there, his mouth hanging open in shock. Jessica stood beside him, filing her nails like the ditz she was.

For someone who hated sports and had a tendency to be clumsy, Bella was doing extremely well in our run. She kept pace with me, though her chest was heaving up and down heavily. My own lungs seemed to be screaming in protest. I pushed further, wanting to put space between us and Bella's overprotective father. We had run completely away from the buildings and were now close to the end of the parking lot where my car was. I looked beside me to see Bella wincing. Truthfully, my own feet had begun to throb. Note to self: take the Volvo next time.

"Where are we going to go?" Bella asked breathlessly.

"My house," I answered, not even thinking about where we could go, just so long as Charlie wasn't there.

She nodded, and I slowed to a jog, Charlie far behind us. "I'm sorry, Edward," Bella panted.

"For what? It wasn't you that made your father insane," I protested. _It was me leaving you. _I thought.

"But what if it was? Maybe something before the crash happened that I did that made him hate you. I just . . . I just wish I could remember everything. Something. Anything at all! But I don't. All I see is one, huge black mass."

"I'm no doctor, but maybe I could figure out some way to . . . restore some of your memory. They've done tons of studies on memory loss and gain, but some of it requires special equipment, and . . ." I was now muttering to myself, forgetting Bella's presence completely.

"Uh, Edward?" she called, pulling me out of my thoughts. "Your car is over here, smart one."

I walked back over, opening the door for her. "Did you just insult me?" I asked, fake hurt coming over my face.

"Insult you?" she laughed. "I believe I called you 'smart one', didn't I?"

"Yes, but by calling me that, you gave me an undirected insult. If you had called me a moron like you were thinking, that would have been a direct insult," I explained, shaking my head in mock sadness. "I feel so betrayed!"

She only snorted, and then laid back her seat. So much for being a comedian.

As I parked my car in the driveway, I realized that Bella hadn't seen the house since before the crash. There was so much she could remember. All of the places I had taken of her, all the people we had met together, all the time we had spent . . . it was all gone.

There were two stories to the magnificent house, both large. Before the navy French doors was a small porch. I frequently sat out here when I read or composed. A brick chimney climbed up the right side of the house, ivy tightly to the bricks and windows. It at times reminded me of the "an old house in Paris, which was covered with vines, lived twelve little girls . . ." from the _Madeline _books. When my father was relocated to Forks from Chicago, he gave my mother full reign over search for a house. It truly was her expertise, since she was an interior designer and would know how to work easily with the space.

"You have an _amazing _house," Bella breathed from beside me. Her stunning eyes had gone wide and adoring. Tempted by her open mouth, I decided to give her a quick kiss. She, however, had different ideas. I once again felt myself being drawn in my sweet scent of strawberry and silky hair and skin.

"Yeah, I know." I answered after I pulled away, thinking of beautiful memories that were made in the two years I had lived in this house.

"Does your mom get a chance to garden much?" she asked.

"No, not after . . ." I trailed off, not wanting to bring back a few memories.

She didn't answer, only went in through the front door.

Her brown eyes wandered over every picture hanging on the walls. She peered curiously at a black-and-white picture by my piano.

"Who is this?" she asked.

"My great-great-grandfather Anthony Masen. That's where I got my middle name from."

"Oh," she said. "I didn't know that your middle name was Anthony."

_You used to. I thought sadly, but only smiled warmly. Her eyes lingered on the piano, as if she was trying to figure out what it was. _

"You play?" she asked me curiously.

I smiled brightly, excitement growing as it always did before I played piano. "Yes; would you like me to show you?"

She grinned, and then said, "Play away, maestro."

I didn't dig through my many sheets of music to find her song - I already knew it by heart. My fingers steadied themselves over the keys, ready to make what I hoped would be amazing music.

A slow, forlorn melody began. There were occasional sounds that were spirited and strong, but they were few and far between. Then the core of the music began, every note dripping with a variance in passion. A mix of lower, more rhythmic notes balanced the higher, lyrical ones that seemed to stick out in every direction. They created the perfect harmony together. Never the same, but always perfectly in sync. Glorious chords and a dance of flats and sharps made the bridge a quirkier, more humorous piece. As the piece drew to an end, the highs and lows came back together in sync. With a sweeping glissando, the piece ending. I turned to Bella, ready for a scoff or bored stare.

What I didn't expect were tears spilling out of her eyes.

"Bella, what's wrong?" I asked, taking her warm hand in mine.

Her eyes met mine, making a delightful buzzing sensation erupt throughout my body. Her expression was that of adoration and love.

"That was beautiful, Edward," she finally stated.

I gently squeezed her hand and said, "So are you."

"I love you," she whispered. "You are my forever."

"I can't imagine forever without you," I returned. "I love you, Bella."

I leaned in to press my lips to hers, inhaling the deep scent of her body. Before I got a chance to really even get the smell of strawberries in my nose, she crushed her face to mine, using all of the force in her tiny body. In a moment of shock, I stayed still, but then dove into her lips. They were so tender that I wanted to vanish inside of her kiss, never to leave her lips. She was like some pill that I was highly addicted to, and would never be able to survive without its sweetness.

She pulled away, tears still streaming down her cheeks. I brushed them away with my thumb, staring perplexedly at her. "Why are you crying?" I questioned.

She shook her head and laughed. "Can't you see? Not only is it because I love you, but because I know I don't deserve you. Someday, you'll fall in love with someone who does deserve you, and I'll be left in the dust. Some prettier than me will come along and you'll rightfully decide that they're who you should be with. Or you'll fall in love with Mike Newton or something like that!"

I tried to contain my laughter, but it was a vain effort. I fell to the floor while clutching my sides and wild laughs escaping my lips.

"What?" Bella demanded. "What is so funny?" She placed her hands on her hips, an annoyed grimace on her face.

"Love- Mike- Not- I-" I choked through my laughter, not being able to form complete sentences.

"This is matter that is not to be regarded as petty, Edward!" she shrieked. "You come up to me in a year and be all, 'Bella, I'm leaving you. The piano can use its tongue much better than you.' What am I supposed to do then?"

I laughed even harder at how absurd she was being. Only Bella would tell me that I would leave her either because I was gay or licking an inanimate object.

Though it took roughly 15 minutes, my laughter eventually died down to mere chuckles. "So would you like to see the rest of the house?" I asked.

"Of course!" Bella grinned.

I led her to the kitchen, which had been redone by my mother. The countertops were a black granite, while the cabinets were the same soft shade of ivory as the exterior. There was a large window above the seat, giving a view of the magnificent backyard. Flowers spilled out of pots and onto the lush grass. The butterflies that flitted from plant to plant made me feel as if I was in the movie _Bambi. _

"I love this place, Edward. It's so amazing. I want to stay here with you forever, but I don't know how your mother would react," she said.

"My mother loves you, Bella. She worries about you all the time, asking me if you're okay," I admitted.

"That's so sweet of her," Bella complimented.

I rested my chin on her shoulder, wrapping my arms around her waist. "I think _you're_ sweet," I purred into her ear, kissing down her neck.

"Edward," she warned. "Stop!" she giggled.

"Fine," I said, releasing her waist. "Here, I'll show you my room."

I led her up the wooden staircase, going to the end of the hall where my bedroom was located. I was about to open the door but stopped.

"Wait," I whispered. "I can't take you in there."

"How come?" she asked.

"Because Mike Newton is in there - naked." I whispered, trying hard not to smile or laugh.

"Why is Mike Newton naked in your bedroom?" she screeched.

"You see, we had a little, err, rendezvous last light. He uses his tongue so much better than you. Mmm . . ." I said, pretending to look as if I was longing for Mike.

This time, I didn't try to stop my laughs when her jaw just about dropped to the floor.


	17. Chapter 17

**Author's note**

**I will NOT post a new chapter in till I get at least 15 reviews **

"Just kidding, just kidding," I chuckled. "Mike Newton has never been in my room. No worries, love."

She immediately relaxed, now smiling up at me. "Lead the way, almighty gay one," she laughed, gesturing to the closed door.

I turned the metal knob, slowly walking in. The floors were a rich cherry wood, while the wall had been painted a gentle blue, but was partially covered by shelves of CD's and various band posters. Among the posters were Muse, Linkin Park, Louis Armstrong, Kid Ory, The White Stripes, My Chemical Romance, Blue October, Frank Sinatra, and Three Days Grace. Sitting in the middle of the room was my bed, clad in a dark blue bedspread. On the wall behind the bed were two huge windows, filling the room with a buttery sunshine.

"Your whole house is amazing," Bella murmured. "Can I stay here forever?" She turned to me, hope shining in her beautiful eyes.

"I wish," I answered, wrapping my arms around her waist. "But unfortunately, your father probably will want to see you home sometime soon. But for now, yes, you can stay."

"Do I have to go back? Can't I just stay here for the night? Charlie isn't one to forgive quickly, and I really don't want to see him right now," Bella protested. "I know I'll have to go back, but I need to think things out. Everything is pushing in on me, and I just need some space from him."

"Well . . ." I chewed on my lip, knowing what I wanted, but fighting over what would be best.

"Please?" she begged, starting to kiss up my neck. Her hands moved from holding mine to into my hair, ruffling it in the most amazing way possible. Tingles erupted in every place she touched.

My train of thought became lost as her lips moved so slowly on my skin. "I . . . uh . . . okay," I stuttered, having to work to get even a few words out. If only she knew of the effect she had on me.

Her lips moved to my jaw, easing slowly up to the corner of my lips. I heard her breathing become ragged, but I couldn't say that I was the epitome of calm either. "Thank you," she breathed onto my lips, just ever so slightly brushing them against mine. The softness of the gesture made my heart pound uncontrollably, but I wanted more than just that. My hands grasped the back of her head, pulling her even closer to me. After one last whiff of her intoxicating scent, I pressed my lips deeply into hers. She gasped into my mouth, but recovered from the shock quickly, and started kissing me back. My tongue traced the outline of her bottom lip, practically begging for entrance. She willingly opened for me.

I wish every man could someday feel a sensation as amazing as kissing Bella Swan. Actually, no I don't. I want to be the only one on the face of the earth that ever gets to feel something like this. I don't want anyone else's heart to have the chance to hammer so consistently like mine has. No one else should have the right to be able to run their fingers stroke her cheek, and then have tingles erupt throughout their hand. I'm not saying that I deserve this more than anyone else (in fact, I'm probably the one who deserves it the least), but I simply want Bella for myself. She's such a perfect creature. The gently slope of her shoulders; the ever present redness on her cheeks; the deep brown of her irises; every bit of her is _beautiful_. I don't know if I can stress the word beautiful enough.

Before I could start kissing her beautiful neck, she pulled away. Her smile was devious, though she didn't do anything out of the ordinary.

"So, where can I find a sleeping bag?" she asked, looking at one of my CDs.

"Sleeping bag? Are you trying to tell me that you will be sleeping on the floor?" I scoffed. "No. You will be sleeping in the bed, while I sleep on the floor."

"Are you arguing with me, Edward Masen?" she gasped in mock horror.

"Yes. You will not be sleeping on the ground." I said firmly. "I will go find a sleeping bag, in which _I _will sleep."

"No," Bella protested, even firmer in tone that I was. "_I _will sleep on the floor. I am a guest in your house. You should let the guest choose where they want to sleep and the guest says that she wants to sleep on the floor. Are we clear?"

"Not at all."

"Glad you and I could come to an understanding," she said cheerily, ignoring my comment. "Now show me where the sleeping bag is."

"Nope," I said stubbornly, popping the 'p'.

"Fine. I'll just sleep on the wood, then." Bella sat down on the bare wood of my floor, lying down with her hands behind her head. She smiled, closing her eyes in mock sleep. "I will stay here until you show me where the sleeping bag is."

"Oh, no you don't." I scooped her up in my arms, plopping her tiny frame down onto the bed. "Why don't you rest while I find the sleeping bag?"

"No!" she exclaimed. She hopped onto the floor. "This is my territory. The bed is yours."

I hoisted her off the ground and into my arms. "I bet I could get you to change your mind," I purred, placing my lips at her throat. She gasped, her arms involuntarily clinging to mine.

"No," she protested breathlessly. "You won't."

"Hmm, we'll see about that." I said before diving into her soft lips. Bella relaxed beneath my soft lips, wrapping her arms around my torso. Both of our breathing became heavy, but I broke off before we started hyperventilating.

I put my forehead on hers, knowing that I would win this battle. "Where am I sleeping?"

"On the bed," she breathed, still able to hold her own.

I sighed, pulling away from her warm embrace.

"You're difficult," I muttered, crossing my arms.

"You're loving, which is why you'll let me sleep on the floor," Bella countered.

"I don't believe I'm really that loving."

"I beg to differ," Bella said.

I thought for a minute, trying to think of something that would sway her. Eventually, an idea that hoped was brilliant came to me. "Bella, if I said that you could sleep where you wanted, would you be willing to give me something in return?"

Her brow furrowed, assessing the situation carefully. "Yeah . . ." she said warily.

"So if I let you sleep where you want, you'll let me do something of my choice." I clarified.

She nodded, still looking apprehensive.

"How about letting me cook for you?" I offered.

Bella smiled oddly, looking down while shaking her head. "You want to _cook _for me? Why?"

I shrugged. "I don't know. I've never cooked before, so I want you to be able to tell me how bad I am."

She snorted, and then said, "Alright. For the measly task of eating, I get to sleep where I want. Awesome."

"Whatever pleases you, love," I murmured, pulling her close to me once again. She sighed into my chest. The sweet smell of her breath _whooshed _onto my neck, making me shiver in pleasure. Her fingers danced lightly on my shoulder, playing with the collar of my gray shirt.

"You know I love you, right?" she asked.

"Mhmm," I practically purred. My nose buried itself into her hair, breathing in the smell of strawberries. "I love you too."

"And if you love me, you won't do something rash like poison the food I'm sampling, right?"

I howled in laughter, mainly just at the fact that she was half-way serious. "No, I won't do that. But I will in no way guarantee that it'll be good."

"I'm sure it will be just fine, Edward. How bad could it be?"

~!~!~!~!~!~

**(If you happen to be eating now, I suggest you put your mac and cheese down.)**

I held up Bella's silky hair as she emptied her stomach's remaining contents in the toilet. Bits of vomit clung to the side of her mouth as she brought her head up. The bitter smell made her face turn sour, a frown painted on her beautiful lips.

"Never cook for me again - ever," she croaked, her voice rough.

"Okay," I agreed quickly, not wanting to put her through this again. "I'm sorry," I said for the thousandth time.

"It's alright. We can work on your cooking skills tomorrow. We'll start with something simple, like cereal," Bella chuckled, getting up from the floor. She washed her face in the sink, washing the funk out of her hair.

"I don't think I have the capability of eating right now, but I'll gladly make you something." Bella offered.

Shaking my head, I answered, "No, I can find food for myself. Maybe something that won't turn into toxic waste. Like Cheez-its."

"All right."

"Meanwhile, I want you to go take a shower, and then rest," I advised.

She bit the tender skin of her lip, brow furrowing again. "I didn't bring any clothes."

"Huh," I murmured. "I guess you could borrow some of my stuff if wanted."

She nodded, and then hurried up the stairs. I searched the kitchen cabinets and refrigerator, hoping to find something that took no more skills than pressing microwave buttons. After finding a box of Cheddar Jack Cheez-its (my all time favorite) and a bowl of Fruit Loops, I headed to my room. I picked a random CD off the towering shelf, and waited for the song to come on. It was one of my favorites, and from one of my favorite artists: The Killers.

_Leaves are falling down__  
__On the beautiful ground__  
__I heard a story from the man in red__  
__He said the leaves are falling down__  
__Such a beautiful sound__  
__Son, I think you better go ahead___

_But you always hold your head up high__  
__Cause it's a long, long, long way down__  
__This town was meant for passing through__  
__But it ain't nothing new__  
__Now go and show them__  
__That the world stayed round__  
__But it's a long, long, long way down___

_You better run for the hills before they burn__  
__Listen to the sound of the world__  
__And watch it turn__  
__I just want to show you what I know__  
__And catch you when the current lets you go__  
__Or should I just get along with myself___

_I never did get along with everybody else__  
__I've been trying hard to do what's right__  
__But you know I could stay here all night__  
__And watch the clouds fall from the sky___

_This river is wild__  
__This river is wild_

There was a quiet _clank_ as I heard Bella turn off the shower. Steam had already wafted through the cracks in the door, making the room more humid than usual.

"Edward?" Bella called out. "Can I borrow and shirt and some shorts?"

"Sure, love," I answered, already rummaging through my dresser. I found a Harvard tee shirt, and a pair of black basketball shorts.

"Just hand 'em through to me," Bella ordered, opening the door a crack.

After giving her the clothes, I selected another CD. This time, I chose one that I knew Bella had told me she liked before the crash.

_Is that seat taken  
Congratulations  
Would you like to take a walk with me_

My mind it kind of goes fast  
I try to slow it down for you  
I think I'd love to take a drive  
I want to give you something  
I've been wanting to give to you for years  
My heart

My heart, my pain won't cover up  
You left me.. hu hu hu hu  
My heart won't take this cover up  
You left me.. hu hu hu hu

I came to see the light in my best friend  
You seemed as happy as you'd ever been  
My chance of being open was broken  
And now you're Mrs. him. 

Steam flew out of the bathroom door as Bella stepped out. Her hair was even darker than usual, and small strands clung gently to her wet cheeks.

"Blue October?" she asked cheerfully. She grinned happily when I nodded. "You know me way too well."

"Should I take that as a good or bad thing?"

"Good, but you, being the Edward you are, could probably find a way to use it against me," Bella said.

"You've sparked so many ideas . . ." I teased.

She laughed, hitting my chest. "Be quiet, you handsome fool."

"Love you too," I said sarcastically. "So, do you feel better?" I felt my brows come closely together, and a worried frown come onto my lips.

"Yeah, actually. Just remind to never let you near a stove again," she chuckled.

"Once again, I love you."

"Love you," she said, finally acknowledging the phrase. She kissed me lightly on the lips, lingering for just a moment.

"You get dressed while I go get something to drink," she commanded.

"Yes, mom."

"No more of the smart comments from you, mister," she ordered, her face set in mock anger.

After she left, I changed into a pair of comfortable pajamas, and grabbing a sleeping bag from my closet. Even though my manhood would be completely extinguished, I brought out my stuffed animal, Mr. Higgenbothambatrothom. Yes, I named a stuffed frog Mr. Higganbothambatrotham.

"Is it safe to look?" Bella asked, covering her eyes playfully.

"Yep."

I looked over to see Bella's mouth, open in utter shock. "Is that . . . a frog?" she asked incredulously.

I sighed, looking down at me feet. "Yes."

"Oh, Edward that is so sweet!" she said, putting her hands to her chest. "You always surprise me."

"You Don't think I'm a dork then?" I said, biting my lip.

"Well, yes, but I still think it's beautiful that you can be so sensitive." she admitted.

I kissed her forehead, rubbing her back.

"Can I sleep with the frog?" she asked.

I frowned, thinking of how hard it would be for me to get to sleep without him. When I was five, my cousin accidentally took him back to his house in Vermont. For over a whole week, I did nothing my scream and cry. Once I had gotten him back, I had scarcely let him go for a year.

"Err, no," I said quietly. "I lied to you earlier. It isn't Mike Newton I enjoy licking, it's this frog."

**Chapter End Notes:**

What is it with me and those crappy endings? There is no spaces in the address

Here's Edward's sexy frog: http : / / i m g 5 9 . i m a g e s h a c k . us / i m g 5 9/ 5 5 9 7 / s f r o g x g 2 . j p g

Now review because you love me.


	18. Chapter 18

My eyes rested on Bella's perfect lips, thinking of how full and gentle they were. Even the moments of roughest passions, they always seemed to stay so gentle and smooth. _Always beautiful_, I thought. And she was beautiful. It was a hidden quality, almost an undercurrent, but it was always present. As far as physical beauty goes, that was always easily viewed. But as far as the internal beauty that she carried . . . It was mind-blowing to think that she could still be so kind, even after all of the bumps life has chucked at her. But she had always been like that, even before the accident. When she had first made a home in Forks, not once did she complain about her parent's divorce or leaving any friends behind. I knew she hadn't been a particularly social person, but she had once mentioned a person or two that she was uncomfortable leaving, including her mother. It touched me that she could be so self-sacrificing.

Among that trait were many others, including her ability to be so patient. With my teasing about Mike Newton and Mr. Higgenbothambatrotham, I would say that she was capable of being patient.

"Edward, shouldn't your mom be home by now?" Bella asked, breaking me from my thoughts. Once again, I was bewitched by her angelic face.

I pondered her question for a moment. At times, my mother would simply call me at an ungodly hour in the morning to say that she was out with friends. "I guess." I told her of my mother's frequent and irregular outings. It sometimes scared me the way my mother would take off so quickly. She hadn't been exactly . . . right, after the crash. I, however, had very little emotional scarring from it. In a way, it was sick. A boy loses his father, yet he feels little pain at all.

She frowned and muttered, "Strange. If she has a cell phone, you could call her."

"It's at least worth a try." I dialed the number and heard four rings until her voice mail came on. "Hello, you've reached Elizabeth Masen. I'm unavailable to take your call right now, but if you could leave a message at the-"

"She didn't pick up," I said. "It was a good try, though. Maybe she'll call later. In the meanwhile, we could do something to entertain ourselves."

Bella shrugged. "Okay. So what do we do then?"

"I'm really not quite sure. It's only 9:30, so we do have time. That is, unless you want to go to sleep now?"

She shook her head as a no. "I am tired, but not enough to go to sleep. We could watch a movie if you wanted. Or we could play a board game, or get you some cooking skills, or-" She had obviously planned to go on, but I silenced her by putting my finger to her lips. She pulled back to kiss it gently.

I grinned, thinking of the perfect movie. "One moment, love," I murmured, racing off to get the movie. Once I was back with the brightly colored DVD case, I handed it to Bella, gauging her reaction.

"Austin Powers," she said quietly. She turned her head to me, a highly amused look on her face. "Austin Powers? Goodness gracious, Edward. You cease to amaze me."

I brushed my shoulder in mock arrogance.

As we started the movie, Bella curled into my side lovingly. Warmth spread throughout my body, but it had nothing to do with temperature or proximity. I laid my head on top of hers. The smell of strawberries wafted up to my nose as I buried my face in her hair.

Laughs ensued as we watched the hilarious movie. At times, we would speak along with the characters. "My name is Richie Cunningham," we both laughed together. "and this is my wife, Oprah!" Even _I _had to laugh at the ludicrously dressed Fembots. I caught Bella snickering when Austin cried, "Does that make you HORNY?" Needless to say, we weren't necessarily silent and somber during the movie. Then again, who could remain quiet in a film of such quality as this?

We were still chuckling as the movie came to an end, but it died down when Bella said, "I thought your mom would have called by now."

I frowned. "Yeah, me too. Maybe work is holding her up. She often has a lot of paper work." Just as I said that, the phone rang.

"Masen residence," I answered politely.

"Edward, this is mom," said my mother. In the background of where ever she was, I heard loud music, as if she had decided to go to a party instead of take care of her son.

"Hey, where are you?"

"Oh, I decided to spend some time with a friend from work. I won't be home until tomorrow, so don't have any crazy teen parties or play too much loud music that I don't understand, okay?" she laughed. The sound bordered on the edge of hysterics. She was obviously drinking.

"Yes, mom." My voice was strained, trying not to get mad at her for not being responsible.

"I love you, Eddy," she said, ending the phone call.

"I love you, but I love you more when you don't call me that," I replied, but she had already hung up. I turned to Bella and said, "Looks like we have the house to ourselves tonight."

She smiled wildly. "Lovely." In a quick switch from bright to tired, she yawned and stretched her arms above her head. "Can we go to sleep now?" she asked, but since it came in the middle of her yawn, it sounded like, "Cow pee know tea flower?"

I tried to hide my laughs, but it soon became to much for my mouth to hold. "You . . . Said . . ." I exploded in laughs yet again.

"What are you laughing at?" Bella asked angrily.

By now, I was almost in control of the laughter. "You just . . . you . . . never mind. Oh, never mind. I'm guessing that you're tired now. I believe anyone would be after having to face the treacherous Fembots."

"Why yes, Mr. Powers, I do believe I am tired," Bella giggled. She placed her hand in mine, jumping a bit when we both felt the familiar fire between our skin. Ever since our first handshake, I had never forgotten the way the skin on my fingertips began to tingle like Pop Rocks and then become aflame.

As I led her upstairs, I realized what this would look like to anyone else. Two teenagers (almost eighteen), late at night, heading up to a large bed . . . I had to admit, it would look very suspicious. But we both knew that it would be a long time before we were ready for an event such as _that_. Our relationship had gone no farther than rough, passionate kisses. And to be honest, I think we both were glad it didn't go any farther. Thinking of it now, I thought of a line in one of my favorite songs.

_Our innocence is a virtue  
But our arrogance will only leave us blind_

Bella let go of my hand as she climbed into the deep blue covers, pulling them generously up to her chin. The hard wood of the floor was welcome to my body in the knowledge that Bella would sleep comfortably. Though I had to admit, the sleeping bag certainly wasn't the fluffiest mattress I had ever rested my sleepy head upon. Still, if my love was able to rest in the nicest of conditions, I was content.

"Edward, this may sound juvenile, but can I have a good night kiss?" Bella requested quietly.

"Of course, love," I said, already to my feet. In a few long strides my face was above hers. The kiss we shared wasn't the raunchy, rough grab. It was more like the first kiss we shared, but without the salty tears mixed in with the taste of her lips. My hands found their way to the back of Bella's neck, bringing her closer to me. She responded, pulling herself even tighter to me. Before it could go deeper, I pulled back gently. I kissed each of her eyelids as they sleepily closed.

After I was lying in my own make-shift bed, I heard her murmur, "I'll belong to you forever, Edward. Nothing will take me away from you."

Though she was probably already asleep, I whispered back, "And I yours. You can keep me forever if you want."

For a few moments, I felt nothing but joy. Pure, unmarred joy.

And then the screaming began.


	19. Chapter 19

B pov.

I felt hollow.

It wasn't an unfamiliar feeling. The false sense of brittleness in the bones of my fingers, the stiffness in my knees that barely holds them up. After what Edward called "the crash", I felt this way a lot. Like there was nothing. Nothing to hold me, nothing to comfort me, and everything to break me.

It was a corner I stood in. A particularly dark one, at that. There wasn't anything especially frightening about this certain corner, but there was an under-lying sense of danger. Almost like the tiny rumble before an earthquake sheds its fury.

Far off, I can hear a low grumbling. It seems as if it's getting closer, and the slight quake under my feet grows stronger. Normally, I would be scared, but is there really anything to be so frightening of right now?

Not then, but now.

It's a train, flying in a rickety rhythm down a set of invisible tracks. The cars are different shades of faded colors with graffiti almost completely covering what paint remains. As each car flits by, I am able to catch a few of the words. _Cathy + Bob = Love; This town sucks!; Al wasn't here; Free Love, Baby! _Had I been around in those times, maybe I would have painted words of regret on train cars.

Now I can see the caboose of the line of cars, and am surprised by a tiny shadow at the end. Its long form seems to be clinging to the end of the train, though it doesn't seem to be struggling for grip. Maybe a tarp or piece of broken metal. As it comes closer, I can see that it isn't a large bit of cloth, but a person. The moonlight seems to be absorbed my their skin, putting of an iridescent glow. The face is strikingly similar to Edward's, though there is a certain element that separates them. It isn't the skin (though I will admit that it is alarmingly pale) or the hair. Even the same angelic beauty is still there, though it seems intensified, and slightly marred by the unnamed difference. His expression is far from the thoughtful expression that Edward so often bears. It is that of hunger. Pure, untamed hunger.

Suddenly the difference is apparent: those eyes. Instead of the warm green, I see only black swimming in glowing crimson.

He hangs casually of the last car as if it's his front porch. His left hangs out, fingers curled in a hunter-like way. In one jerky movement, he has caught the front of my shirt, never leaving the moving train. I hang over the flashing ground, looking down with eyes that are more than wary. Now that I am in his reach, the man licks his lips, smiling at me in a sickening way. _This isn't Edward! _I screech inside my head. He is unaware of my panic. His eyes have moved to the largest vein in my throat, moving towards it slowly. There is a slight crunch as his teeth punctured my flesh, and an even louder shriek as the pain arrived.

It was like ice. Everywhere - making my eyes swollen, clogging my throat, speeding through my veins, choking my heart. It was like ice, except fire. Two complete opposites, yet meshing so uncontrollably well as one.

I screamed again, and the keening sound was far more agonizing this time. "Make it stop!" I cried. "Stop! Please, please stop!" The monstrous Edward looked up from the crook of my neck only to glare and then sink his teeth even deeper. He began to shake my shoulders . . .

"Bella," someone said soothingly. "Bella, shh, it's going to stop. Wake up, Bella, wake up." I felt my eyes ease open to find a god-like creature holding me against his chest.

"Edward?" I whimpered. My voice sounded rough and thick.

"Yes, love. I'm here," he whispered. "Are you all right? Those were some loud screams."

"I was screaming?" I asked.

"Yes. You sounded like you were I some sort of pain. It scared me," he admitted. Then more quietly he added, "I hate to see you in such pain."

"What was I screaming?"

"Well, you were talking for a bit before that. You were saying something about a train and eyes. And then you started to scream, 'Make it stop!'. You were . . . begging." He paused, his body going still for a moment. The worried expression on his face put uncomfortable knots in my stomach. "Do you mind if I ask what you were dreaming about. If you don't want to, that's fine. I'm just curious."

"It's okay. I was dreaming about a train. There was this . . . _thing_ at the end. It was kind of like a human, but more animal-like. He pulled me onto the train while it was moving. Then he started to . . . eat me."

To my surprise, Edward chuckled. "I'm sorry to laugh, love. That's sick of me. It's just . . . it tried to eat you?" Another laugh escaped his beautiful lips.

"And succeeded," I murmured. "You wouldn't know what it was like, Edward; I don't blame you for laughing. It was . . ." I paused, not sure if I should share who the creature resembled. "Never mind."

"What? It was what, Bella?" Edward prodded. He shook his head. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't press on something that frightens you so much. I'll go back to sleep now."

My arms slowly slid from their grip around his back as he got up. Already, my body ached to be in his arms. The hollow feeling arose again, just as it did whenever Edward happened to be absent.

I took a deep breath, bracing myself for his reaction. Fury? Sadness? "It was you." The words came out in a whoosh, making them hard to understand.

"What?"

"It was you. Or at least it looked like it." My voice had become quieter than a whisper, but he obviously heard.

Though there were no lights, I could tell by the minimum light that this pained him. "I'm going to sleep now," he said, closing his eyes before he was able to lay down. "I'm such a sick monster . . ." I heard him mutter. "You're a moron, Edward, a moron!"

There was the crinkling sound of his body nestling into the synthetic fibers of the bag, and then silence. Before it could grow into an awkward emptiness, I heard tiny sniffles. They weren't the petty, meaningless tears that a regular person would release, but the sorrowful tears shed by a man at a his weakest. The sound actually pained me. I longed to simply sit up and say, "That wasn't true. Just joking!" But that would be a lie. And what would a lie mean to him? More pain, more sadness?

Instead, I crawled off of the large bed and onto the floor. I laid myself by the sleeping bag, wrapping my arms around Edward's muscled body. I stroked his back in an attempt to soothe him. "I'm sorry," I breathed against his neck. This wasn't a lie. To see Edward in pain such as this . . . It was unbearable. "Maybe I shouldn't have said anything. It was stupid of me."

He didn't answer, only continued to sniffle. Though it took effort, I hoisted his body onto the bed, tucking the covers around his chin. The action made me feel maternal. To keep him happy, I snuggled in beside him. I didn't have to move an inch before he had me wrapped into his chest.

"You shouldn't have apologized," he said. "I shouldn't have reacted that way. I could have tried to comfort you, but instead you do that to me. It makes me feel like a kid, and I really don't enjoy that. I want to be able to help _you_, not the other way around."

"You need to stop blaming yourself. I am the weak one in the relationship. Have you noticed that I constantly need you around me, constantly to know that you'll be with me forever and that you love me?" I asked, shaking my head all the while.

"Isn't that how it's supposed to work?" Edward countered. "I take the role of the super hero, and you the damsel in distress. At least, that's how it happens in movies. If I save you time and time again, there's always a happy ending for us. But I've failed. I let you get hurt and broken while I sat on the sidelines and watched. It's sick. Very, very sick. But you've been suffering without complaint. That just doesn't seem fair. Shouldn't I, the one who could have saved you, have been the one who was punished?"

"No." My answer was simple. No other words were needed.

"Yes, Bella, I should," he objected.

I sat up, now facing him. "Why are you always so intent on having the blame all to yourself? I mean, you don't you just let someone else be the culprit for once? It's not like you're the one that did this to me." I used my hand to gesture to my head that had been emptied of all its memories.

"You didn't either," Edward countered. An unidentifiable emotion flashed across his beautiful features.

"The fact that I didn't doesn't mean that you did," I said exasperatedly. "Look, can we just forget about this?"

"No," he began. "but we can stop talking about it if you want." He brought me back into his chest and buried his nose into my messy hair. Already, the conversation we just had seemed to be fading away into the smell of his skin.

"You have an uncanny ability to make me feel better," I admitted.

"It's not like you don't do the same to me. Everything about you-- your hair, your voice, your _eyes -- _it all seems to just push everything away." He paused, and then continued with, "That probably the cheesiest thing ever verbalized by mankind."

I laughed. "I thought it was sweet."

"Glad you thought so. Now sleep, love." I recognized the tinkling melody he had played for me earlier as I drifted into the most satisfied sleep of my life.


	20. Chapter 20

Edward's POV

I awoke to the lovely smell of my face in Bella's hair. My arms were wrapped loosely around her waist, and her arm was draped over my chest. She slept on her stomach, her back moving up evenly with each breath. _The most divine creature ever created, _I thought to myself. When her brown hair splayed out in every direction, her lips open ever so slightly, and her face so painless, so clear, it was impossible to deny that she was beautiful. As she breathed in deeply, I admired her pale skin. For a Phoenix girl, she looked quite a bit like a Victorian doll. So delicate, so fragile. When I lived in Chicago, I walked everywhere, so my skin became tanner. Not to the point of a lifeguard standard, but dark none the less.

"Edward," she murmured in her sleep, shifting to get closer to me. "Edward Masen, you're amazing." I was surprised that it sounded so clear. Had I not known what a terrible actress she was, I might have thought she was awake.

"So are you," I whispered back almost inaudibly. I made sure that I did barely more than mouth it when I said, "Marry me, my angel." I knew I wanted that. Every plan in my future involved Bella. I wouldn't ask her in high school, of course (she wouldn't like others to stare because of such an anomaly), but I was sure I would someday.

"Yes, Edward. Whatever you want." Her sleep-talk surprised me. Did she just . . .? "I _will_ put ham on the sandwich if you want." I sighed in relief as she murmured this.

I lifted her thin arm gently off my chest and got up. Bella's sleeping form frowned, and muttered, "Oh, so you don't want ham?" I chuckled quietly and walked out the room, shutting the door quietly.

After seeing that my mother's bed was still empty, I headed downstairs. Bella had told me that she was a late sleeper, and seeing as how I enjoy getting up at six o'clock, I decided on finding something to do.

The piano stood in the same spot as last night, ready for me to think of another song for my Bella. Already having written something more romantic, I decided on something more dramatic. She always told me that my emotions sent her spinning, but I thought that she was the confusing one.

My fingers hesitated on the ivory keys for a moment. What if Bella didn't like the composition I made especially for her? What if she thought it was mediocre, inexpertly crafted? I bit my lip, wondering how I should start it. My thumb shifted from middle C down to one much lower. I held the pitch for a moment, letting the richness of the tone fill the air. With a quick slide over, my fingers began belting a series of lively notes, each seeming to jostle each other for the spotlight. _Quirky, _I thought. The jazzy melody progressed into a mellower, much more subdued tune. Though it was much deeper, the driving beat remained present. Chords erupted, sending the song into a more cheerful phase again, but a completely different melody. Every so often it would dip into a lower note, and then sway easily back into the peppy jive. This repeated, though never got tedious because of the frantic bridge.

By the time I looked at the clock, four hours had slipped by. I decided that Bella had her own bed; she could sleep later.

The sound of her even breathing was still able to be heard as I tiptoed up to the bed. She was lying on her back now, both arms around a pillow. I leapt onto the bed, putting my face above hers. My body hovered over her as I placed my lips onto hers. As though she had been awake all along, she dropped the pillow to wrap her arms around my neck, pulling me down on top of her.

"Good morning," I breathed against her lips.

"It is now," she laughed, putting a chaste kiss on my lips. She stared at me for a moment and then said, "Your hair is beautiful in the morning. It's so messy." Her pale fingers ran through the length of my hair. "Scratch that. Everything about you in the morning is beautiful."

"I think _you_ look much more gorgeous. One could even say pulchritudinous," I countered.

"You and your debonair ways, Edward." She shook her head. "You're always so gentlemanly. By what you say of your father, he obviously didn't teach you your manners."

I shrugged. "My mother always told me to be polite. I just thought that rule should be extended especially to women."

Bella laughed. "Didn't you ever just want to slap someone, though? Or go wild?"

I leaned into the side of her head, my teeth grazing her earlobe. She shivered under my touch. "Why yes, I actually have. Go wild, that is."

"Really?" she mused, her voice heavy from erratic breathing.

"Yes, love. Really." My lips connected with the skin of her neck, trailing up until I reached her jaw line. I let my nose graze the skin there, running back and forth across the flawless, pale edge. Beneath me, I felt Bella's hand move to my shoulders and massage them. "You're tense," she observed, her voice still shaky.

"Self-control tends to make one tense," I admitted against the corner of her lips.

"How tense would you be if I did this?" I gasped when she nipped playfully at my ear. That's right; not grazing, _nip_ - as in _bite_.

"Bella," I warned. "If you keep doing things such as that, you will most likely break through my perfectly built self-control."

She giggled into my ear. "Okay, none of that. How about kissing; can we do that?"

Instead of using meaningless words, I caught her lips in mine. She was the one to gasp this time, but immediately responded. Her hands braided themselves into my hair as my own went to her back, pulling her small body closer. One of her hands slid from my hair down to my face, cupping it gently.

We pulled back, both of us panting. I leaned back in to kiss Bella on her cheeks, the tip of her nose, her closed eyelids, and finishing with her forehead.

"That was a great way to start the day," Bella sighed.

"We should do this more often - you know, the make-your-dad-mad-and-then-stay-at-my-house thing."

Bella laughed, her smile making me dizzy. "I'd like that. Just not now, with the way my dad's been acting. There's always college . . ."

"Speaking of that, do you know where you want to go?" I asked. My fingers began to fiddle with her hair.

"I haven't decided yet. Some place with a good art museum nearby," she answered. "How 'bout you?"

"I was thinking about DePaul. It's in Chicago, so that would be pretty nostalgic for me." I thought for a moment, and then added, "You know, I think they have a pretty good art program there. Not to mention the museum. When I was a kid, my parents would take me there once a month because I loved it so much."

Bella smiled happily. "Where's my application form?"

~!~!~!~!~!~

Once we had managed to pull ourselves off each other and get out of my room, Bella decided to make breakfast.

"You don't have to do that, love," I protested. "I can just make myself some cereal and-"

"No," Bella interrupted. "I am going to make you a proper breakfast. Now sit down." I did as she said and sat in one of the bar stools by the counter, watching her fingers flit easily over the ingredients. The way she worked so easily and carefree left me with nothing to say. Watching her in a mode such as that was awe-inspiring.

"What're you looking at, Mr. Masen?" Bella asked, not looking up from her mixing bowl.

"You," I answered truthfully. "You look so . . . breath-taking when you cook."

She cocked her eye-brow in genuine confusion. "When I hold a mixing bowl you find me more appealing?"

I laughed loudly at her bewilderment towards my comment. Beautiful, naïve, Bella. It amused me that she was so unaware of the beauty that she carried. I was also surprised that she never noticed the men around her staring.

I got up to wrap my arms around her waist. "It isn't that you aren't gorgeous anywhere else, and believe me, you are, I just find that when you cook you seem to not see anything else. When you're in your own little world, all of your beauty comes out."

She turned to face me, adoration clear I her eyes. "I love you. You're the most amazing man I can ever imagine. So perfect."

"I could say the same about you," I started. "But why don't I just show you?" I moved my lips towards hers, but she simply turned her head so that I would only kiss her cheek.

"Ah, ah, ah, lover boy. I have breakfast to make, and I am trying not to get pancake batter everywhere," Bella scolded. "If you want to do something, go find me a pan. These crepes won't make themselves."

"Mmm," I murmured, getting out an large pan as she had instructed.. "I haven't had crepes in a long time. How'd you learn to make them? I thought that you said Renee's food was more like a lethal science experiment."

"Oh, it is," she laughed, leaning back into my chest. "I learned before the crash. Remember? I told you that day that I had a few a memories of my time with Renee. Not many; the only I have are of some cooking and planting flowers." Her full lips turned down into a frown. "I couldn't even remember her husband's name. Charlie had to tell me. I hate being like this . . . so vulnerable. I'm always disappointed that I can't just toughen up and have the memories just fly on back."

I turned her face towards mine, making sure that her eyes were focused clearly on my face. "You're disappointed in yourself?" She nodded. "Love, you need to get the notion out of your head. None of this is your fault. No matter how much of it you try to blame on yourself, it will never be your fault."

She turned to face the stove again. "I won't even try to disagree with you. I'm pretty sure I'll lose. You tend to be very persuasive."

I kissed the skin below her ear. "It's my devilish smile, isn't it?" I joked.

"Sure, Edward, sure it is," she laughed.

We ate our breakfast in a tranquil silence, neither of us awake enough to make any real conversation. I watched Bella carefully as she blew on her food. If I could simply look at her angelic face for the rest of my life, I would completely satisfied. She caught me staring and blushed. That had to be one of my favorite things about her. The way her cheeks blossomed into such an exquisite color was truly enrapturing. She turned her gaze to the large window, where outside the rain was pouring in sheets. Her lips turned downward in distaste.

"Bella, why don't you enjoy the rain?" I asked. Her hate for the cloudy weather had always befuddled me.

"I don't know. It just seems so depressing to me," she grumbled.

An idea popped into my head, sending a smile onto my face. "Finish your breakfast, and then I want to do something."

She turned wary, staring at me with her brow raised. "Okay, Edward, but this better be safe. I don't want to lose my memory again."

~!~!~!~!~!~

"Have you ever even given the rain a chance?" I pleaded.

"The answer remains as _no_," Bella said curtly.

"Please, Bella?" I begged. I moved closer, running my nose along her jaw line. She froze for a second, leaning into my touch, but quickly pulled back.

"Nope," she said, popping the _p_. "There is no way I'll ever do that. Do you realize how moronic we'll seem? Your neighbors will think I've gone insane."

"Not if we do it in the back yard," I suggested.

She sighed, showing signs of defeat. "Well, if we do it in the back yard . . ."

I kissed her hand happily. "Thank you, Bella." My smile almost cracked my face in half. "Trust me, you'll love this. I played on this almost every day when I was a kid."

The air _whooshed_ pass my ears as I ran into our storage room. There, sitting in the corner as it had been for years, was my old Slip n' Slide from I was seven. The slick, neon plastic didn't come out of the box easily. When it was crunched in a ball in my arms, I stepped out of the over-stuffed space. There wouldn't be a need for a hose; the sheets of rain would be enough. Bella shook her head as I walked by her.

"I still can't believe I'm doing this," she muttered. She said more loudly, "It isn't that I'm keeping what ego I have from getting bruised, but I'm just wondering what made you think of doing such a juvenile thing!"

"You make me feel young again," I laughed in an attempt at an elderly voice. When she grabbed for her raincoat, I said, "That thing won't keep you very dry. It'll only hold off the water for a second." She sighed, placing it back down.

She murmured a "thank you" as I opened the door for her. Once outside, I laid out the slide, smoothing it onto the spring grass.

Once it had been set up, I turned to Bella and asked, "Would you like to go first?" She shook her head as a _no_. "Suit yourself." Before running back to get a good start on my slide, I pulled off my shirt, knowing it would only slow me down. It wouldn't bother Bella. In fact, I bet she wouldn't even notice it.

Bella's POV

Oh, dear.

If I'm being completely honest, my mind was terribly confused. Thoughts buzzed frantically, making me feel dizzy. My eyes widened, taking in what was before me. The tendons in my hands contracted, telling me not to let them move towards what was before me. My lips pursed together tightly in order for them not to kiss what was before me.

Every sign pointed in one direction: Edward had just pulled off his shirt.

For what reason, I have no idea why. Maybe there would be less friction if it was only his skin touching the plastic, therefore giving him more speed. Frankly, I'm not sure if my mind was clear enough to even try to figure it out.

He stepped back, pressure gaining his apparent muscles. They rippled slightly beneath his skin, making me swoon. In a burst of energy, he shot forward with breath-taking grace. A few feet before the beginning of the slide, he flew into a position similar to that of a super-hero. As his bare flesh collided with the plastic, he slid on, hitting the end with an _oof!_

He got up, brushed the water off of his finely sculpted chest, and walked over to me. Let me tell you, if Edward is striking without his shirt from a distance, he is absolutely God-like up close. "Would you like to go now?" he asked.

I sighed. "Why not."

I decided to follow Edward's actions. Up until the super-hero dive, I was doing so well. Before I was able to put my body in the board-straight position, my toe caught on some sort of invisible rock. So instead of sliding gracefully on my stomach to the end, I flopped onto my back and made it to the end.

Edward was by my side in a flash, his hands moving over my body worriedly. "Are you okay, Bella?"

"Ow," I said. It didn't hurt much except for a small pounding my back.

He laughed. "I'll take that as a _no_. Where does it hurt?"

I shrugged.

He leaned in, pressing his lips gently against mine. "Here?" His lips touched my cheeks and forehead. "Here?" I shivered as his lips ran up my jaw. "Or here?" His lips found their way onto my neck, swerving down to kiss the hollow in my collar bone. "Is that any better?"

"If I say no, will you keep kissing me?" I teased.

"Anything for you, love," he murmured before tenderly kissing my lips.

As we got up I asked, "Can we do that again?" Though I had fallen flat on my back, it was surprisingly very fun.

"The kissing or the sliding?" he chuckled.

"I was thinking the sliding."

He hesitated. "Okay. But be careful. I don't want to see you hurt."

"Yes, mom," I laughed.

This slide was also different from the last time. Not because I fell, but because as I jumped into the super-hero position, Edward jumped with me, wrapping his arms around my waist. In a motion that I probably would have screwed up and died in, he flipped over so that I was on top of him as we landed together.

Before he got up, Edward said, "Now tell me if your mother would have done that."


	21. Chapter 21

We continued to slide in the back yard for hours, laughing at ourselves when we fell or tripped. Soon we were soaked to the bone, our clothes heavy and sticking so our skin from the constant downpour. Though I began to tire, Edward's stamina remain steady.

Usually I avoided recreation. Needless to say (what with my impeccable grace), I was afraid of hurting myself. Edward, however, was quite the athlete. After being in track since 7th grade, he could run faster than anyone I knew, and still do it with grace. It wasn't the grace of a dancer. More of a predatory grace likes an animal that killed in the savanna sun.

There are so many more sophisticated, mature words that I could've used to describe him when he ran and slid, but the only thing I could think of was _sexy_. Maybe I shouldn't say that. I probably sound like a filthy-minded teenager. I am teenager, but am in no way filthy-minded. Yes, every once in a while, my thoughts would shift to the idea of Edward kissing me, running his hands up and down my sides. But was that so bad? Didn't usual teenagers have more graphic, explicit thoughts than I?

My reverie was interrupted my Edward strolling towards me, quietly singing. "Let your beauty unfold. Pale white, like the skin stretched over your bones. Spring keeps you ever close . . ."

"What song is that?" I asked.

He frowned for a moment, but then said, "_The Boy Who Blocked His Own Shot _by Brand New."

"I like it." I smiled. "It's beautiful." _But everything sounds good when it comes from your lips, _I thought.

The frown faded from his face and was replaced by a blinding smile. "Glad you think so, love."

"Why did you frown?" I asked, changing the subject quickly.

"What?"

"When I asked you what the song was, you frowned," I explained slowly.

"Oh," he said. "No reason."

There was a moment of awkward silence before he said, "Think we should go get cleaned up?" He picked some mud and grass off of his green shirt.

I laughed. "Yeah, we probably should. You know, you have mud on your nose."

He laughed, too. "You do too, Bella. In fact, you also have it on your forehead, arms, hair, chin, _and_ shirt." I looked down and saw that I did in fact have dirt streaked across my stomach and chest.

"Like you don't either!" I retorted. "At least I don't have it on my face like a pie." I grabbed a handful of mud and threw it at his beautiful face.

For a moment, he stood still in shock. After shutting his gaping mouth, he said, "I never thought that my sweet, innocent Bella could do that."

"Sweet, innocent?" I snorted. "Right."

"Oh," he said. "So if you're so devilish, I can be, too, right?" In a motion so quick that I almost became dizzy, he scooped up a glop of mud and threw it at me. Unlike him, my hands were small. With more capacity for the mud, much more hit me. From the peak of my forehead to my hips, I was covered completely in the dripping mess.

"Edward!" I screeched, but there was humor in my tone. I'm not sure if he heard me, due to the fact that he had doubled over laughing.

"Yes, love?" he managed to gasp between fits of laughter.

The gears in my head began to turn. Instead of the simple plan (to shove mud in his mouth) I had mapped out, it changed into something a bit more complex, yet would be much more fun. Well, at least for me.

My steps toward him were slow and steady, walking to an inaudible pulse. As I got closer to him, he froze. "Oh, nothing," I purred. "Nothing is wrong." My finger touched his collar bone lightly, dragging it down until it reached the middle of his stomach. He grabbed my wrist quickly.

"Bella," Edward said through clenched teeth. "That is _not fair_."

I leaned my head into the crook of his neck. "Hmm. After what you just did to me, I believe this is quite fair." With a great amount of strength I shoved him, sending face to meet the ground. "Ha!" I laughed.

My laughter was interrupted when he groaned, clutching at his shoulder. "Ouch," he hissed. Instead of the usual calm beauty that graced his features, they were scrunched in pain. He got into a sitting position, resting on the uninjured arm. He pushed off my hands when I attempted to touch him. I will admit, that was probably not near as painful as his shoulder.

"Edward, I'm sorry!" I cried. "I didn't mean to--"

"Push me?" he offered, the fury still lighting his green eyes,

"Well, I did mean to do that, but I didn't mean to hurt you. If there's anything I can do, just tell me," I said quickly. When he didn't answer, I looked toward his shoulder again. "Please tell me you aren't injured that deeply. For one, I can't live knowing that I hurt you. Two, I don't know First Aid. Being a Girl Scout was never high on my list."

"I think knowing that my girlfriend was able to push me hurt more than the joint," he said quietly. "But," He went to his knees, wiping off his elbow. "I suppose there is one thing you could do."

My head snapped up. "Anything," I said earnestly.

Edward stood to his feet, pushing me back gently into the mud. "Hey!" I huffed, but he ignored me. A beautiful smile made his face glow, just as if his shoulder had never hurt in the first place. Huh. His hands grabbed my ankles, forming a nearly unbreakable hold. He towed me by my feet through the yard, making the back of my shirt look more like it was brown instead of white. "Edward, stop it!"

"You know what, I don't think I will," he laughed. "This is too much fun!"

"Edward Masen!" I barked. "You better pray that I don't send the banshees onto your tail. Better yet, you better hope that I don't send Charlie after you."

He froze for a moment, terrified at what the consequences might be. He dropped my ankles. They fell to the ground with a painful _thunk_.

"Gotcha," I giggled. He sighed in relief. "Your shoulder was never hurt, was it?"

"I had to get you back somehow," he said. "Doing those things to me was _not fair_." He crossed his arms.

"It was very fair, in my opinion. I'll never be able to get all of this mud off! And for that, I can thank my loving boyfriend and his amazing throw."

He grinned. "We should play baseball sometime."

"Show--"

"Shh," he said. He inclined his head towards the door, listening. "Do you hear that?" he whispered.

Sure enough, I heard the tiny dangling of keys and someone calling, "Edward?"

"That would be my mother," he said quietly. "I don't know if this would be the best time for you to see her. Both of us being muddy, and all. And if she finds out that you stayed here last night - which she probably will - we're toast."

"Why is that?"

"She's been a tad paranoid after the crash. It's even hard for her to let me leave the house. Imagine how she'll react when she finds out that we slept in the same bed," he explained.

I grimaced. "What would we have done? Is kissing considered taboo?"

He laughed. "I repeat, sweet, innocent Bella."

"What? I don't understand," I whined.

"Uh, that's alright. I'll tell you some other time," he promised. "But as to the fact that my mother is inside, what do you suggest we do?"

I racked my brain for ideas quickly. "I don't know. I could sneak out the gate."

"And go home to your father like this? He'll be mad enough that you even stayed here last night. What do you think he'll say when he sees that you're covered in head to toe with mud and grass?"

"Good point. But I can't exactly go inside, either. If by some miracle that she doesn't see me, she'll see the mud tracks," I pointed out.

"Damn," he muttered. "We'll go for the gate then. I'll go find the hose and we can clean off."

I nodded.

"On three. One," he whispered.

"Two," I breathed.

"Three!"

As we sprinted towards the other end of the yard, I thought of when we had recently run from Charlie, leaving him to wonder where his little girl was. Though I wouldn't have changed my choice of staying with Edward last night, it was selfish of me to leave my own father wondering where I was. His mind could have wandered to so many terrible things. Had we been in a crash? Had I been kidnapped?

We fled through the wooden gait, both of us panting. Edward found the green garden hose by his mother's herb garden. I watched with wide eyes as the water slid slowly down his face and neck, lingering on the muscles of his chest. He handed the hose to me. "Your turn."

The water was ice cold, but it was still a relief to get the caked mud off of my body. Once finished, Edward suggested we talk a walk to dry off. It would give us a chance to talk.

"Bella, will you show me some of your art?" Edward asked.

"I don't know. It's hardly amazing," I muttered.

He chuckled. "You always doubt yourself. I'll bet it's great. What do you enjoy drawing?"

I smiled brightly. "I just finished a painting of a sunset that I did with some cheap acrylics. It's not necessarily focusing on the sunset, more the contrast of the sky and the water. I used some metallic colors too, so, hopefully that adds some interest to it. Before that, I did some charcoal work. I did a picture of Charlie. Somehow, I got him to pose for me. I also did one with a tiny plant holder with only a few leaves, but in its shadow, there are vines and flowers spilling out of the cup. It's my favorite that I've done."

"Did you ever think about making art a career?"

"Hmm. Maybe, I don't know. I'd love to do art for the rest of my life, but I don't know if the pressure of being a free-lance artist would be too much."

"You could teach art classes or lessons on the side," he suggested.

"What would I have to offer a child that wanted to do art?" I asked. "There's nothing I can teach them. They either make art, or they don't. You can't learn it, you simply do it. If you can see the object, it becomes your responsibility to transfer that. You can't learn those things."

He laughed. "What?" I laughed along with him. "Do you find that amusing, Mr. Masen?"

"No, it's just that you seem to have it all thought out. I'm not sure what to do with my future."

"Well, what so you have planned so far?"

He seemed to think for a moment, and then answered, "I've always planned on being a doctor. My mother encouraged me in that, and always told me to learn as much as I could about it. And then I started taking piano lessons." His eyes took on a dreamy gaze. "It may sound cheesy, but it felt like everything changed after that. I loved it, but you probably already knew that from last night when I played for you. Now I'm not sure of whether I want to be a composer or doctor. I suppose that being a doctor would be better, with saving lives and all that, but I also want to devote my life to music so much."

"Do both," I advised simply.

"What?"

"Do both."

"It's not that simple, Bella."

"Isn't it, though?"

He sighed. "With only doing medical studies, I'll spend years in college. Along with another major or minor, it'll be forever until I can finally get a job."

I grimaced. Maybe it was harder than I thought. "Which one makes you happier?"

"Composing," he said quickly.

"Then do that one."

"But don't you see?" he asked. "I'll be letting others die if I do that."

I fully faced him. "Edward." I took him by the shoulders. "Contrary to popular belief, there are others who will gladly do the job. You aren't the only person on earth that can stomach looking at blood and gore each day."

"True, but . . ."

"But what? This makes you happy. Do it," I said sternly.

He pulled me into his side. "I love you, Bella," he laughed.

"For what, helping you decide on a career?"

"No, for--"

Instead of hearing what I hoped would have been loving words, someone else hollered, "Isabella Marie Swan! Get in the cruiser _now_!

Joy.


	22. Chapter 22

**Author's Chapter Notes:**

AHH! I'M SO FRIDGIN' EVIL!

"_Isabella Marie Swan! Get in the cruiser now!"_

"Why on earth are you with Edward Masen?" Charlie barked. His face became a lovely shade of purple. "I told you that he was bad news, Bella. Bad news."

I opened my mouth to say something, but he barreled on. "And you stayed at his house! Don't think I'm that naïve, Bella. I was a teenager once."

_But you obviously remember nothing about it,_ I thought bitterly. _You also don't remember that I hate when people use my middle name._ At least he tried to be a good, protecting father. He had the protecting part down pat.

"Dad, could you please listen? Just give me a moment to state my case," I said calmly, holding my palms out in a sign of peace. "Nothing happened last night. You know that I am not the type of girl who would do that, and neither is Edward. He is a gentleman, thank you very much. We got to his house, he played beautifully on his piano, we watched movie, and then we went to sleep. When we woke up, I made crepes, and then we played around in the backyard. As you saw a few minutes ago, we took a walk."

"Oh," he said quietly. "Well, I still think he's bad news." His tone softened. "He could hurt you, Bella."

Edward pulled me into his chest. "I would _never_ do that," Edward promised. He leaned into my ear and whispered, "I love you too much. You know that." I took a moment to swoon, but turned to Charlie after a minute.

"When we get home, you and I are going to have a long talk, alright?" I asked firmly.

He sighed. "Fine. Get in the car, then."

"But what about Edward?"

He sighed again. "If it makes you happy, walk with him back to the house," Charlie grumbled. "Just don't take long in getting back home."

"Thank you, oh loving father," I laughed.

"Whatever," he muttered, and drove off.

I turned to Edward. "What was it you wanted to tell me?"

He tapped his chin jokingly. "Loving you, or something crazy like that."

"Edward . . ."

His beautiful laughed sounded, making me weak at the knees. "I was telling you why I love you. I was going to tell you that I love you for simply finding it in yourself to love me. Do you remember our first day together?" I nodded. "You told me you loved me, even though we hadn't even spoken since before the crash."

"I still cherish that memory," I said. "It's beautiful, you know. Not just the meadow, but you. You looked so happy."

"Do I not look happy now?" His brow furrowed. "Because I certainly am."

"I know, but it seemed as if there was . . . nothing between us."

"Oh. Alright."

"Is there anything between us?"

He sighed. "No, Bella. Nothing is between us."

--

"Okay. What exactly do you want to talk about?" Charlie asked, sitting down on the old couch.

Might as well not beat around the bush. "Why don't you like Edward?"

He sighed heavily. "It's complicated." His fingers played with the material on one of the pillows nervously. "But to be blunt, I don't want to see you hurt, Bella. I know that you . . . love him, but that doesn't mean that it might not end."

I bit back the yell that grew in my throat. Would Edward really do that to me? Surely he wouldn't, knowing how much it would hurt me. "He would never do that." I hope, at least.

"Yes, but, it still scares me. Any day, he could walk out the door. I don't want to see my little girl hurt like that. You know how much you mean to me."

"Yes, dad, but I know"- Do I? - "for a fact that Edward wouldn't do that. Contrary to what you have come to believe, he is actually a decent guy. He's kind, gets top grades, is obviously good-looking . . ."

Charlie waved his hands in front of his face. "Ugh, gross. I don't need to hear that."

I laughed. "So are you now on good terms with Edward?"

Once again, he heaved a sigh. "I suppose . . ."

I launched myself at him, putting my arms around his neck in a choking embrace. "Thank you, Dad! You know I love you, right?"

"Yes, Bella, I know." After I had released him, he shifted uncomfortably in his seat. "But there's something else I'd like to talk about."

"Okay," I chirped, happy that my father was finally at peace with Edward. "Shoot."

"Well, uh, your relationship seems to be very serious with Edward," he began nervously. "And you are getting older, whether I like it or not, so that means more responsibilities. A lot more. You have to be responsible when you're in a relationship like this, and I wanted to make sure that you two are, um, you know, protecting yourselves . . ."

"Wait - are you trying to have a . . . sex talk with me? Ugh." I recoiled, and I'm sure my face showed how disgusted I was. "Dad, you have to know that we haven't . . . we didn't . . .ugh. We haven't done that. At all."

Charlie smiled a bit, looking highly relieved. "Oh. Okay. That's it. But if you do-"

"We won't," I interrupted.

"I just don't want you hurt, Bella."

"I get it, Dad. Can I go now?"

"Yes," he permitted.

I walked up to my room, a bittersweet feeling in my mouth. On one side, I was overjoyed that Charlie had come to peace with the fact that I loved Edward. On the other, he was thinking that we were . . . ugh. I shuddered again.

Edward would never let that happen. He was a gentleman, and even if he did want it, he wouldn't push me into something I wasn't ready for.

I decided to call one of the few friends I had. It wasn't that I was a pariah of some sort, but I didn't feel the need to get attached to people. Other than Edward, Tyler Crowley and Angela Weber were my closest friends. Even though I loved him more than anyone would ever be able to comprehend, I needed time to be with another girl like Angela, just to know that she would be there for me.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Angela. This is Bella," I said.

"Oh. Hey, Bella," she replied. "What's up?"

"We haven't done much of anything in a while. We could catch a movie in Port Angeles, or something," I suggested. "I'm fine with whatever you prefer."

"How about the movie and then dinner? I hear there's some good sea food. Sound good?"

"Yeah," I agreed. "If it isn't too much trouble, would you pick me up. My truck isn't exactly the epitome of perfection."

She laughed. "That's fine. I'll be there in 15 minutes."

"Bye, Ang."

"Bye, Bella."

I grabbed the purse I rarely used, and headed down the stairs. When I told Charlie about my plans, he replied, "That's great, Bells." He smiled brightly, obviously happy that I was having fun with someone other than Edward.

When Angela arrived, we hugged lightly. "So, what's bringing on the socialism all the sudden?"

I shrugged. "I needed to spend some time with a friend."

She smiled.

Throughout our whole ride, there was silence. It wasn't awkward, but more comforting than anything. Neither of us were what you would call particularly verbose. The quiet was broken after a few minutes.

"So, how are things going with Edward?" Angela asked.

"Fine." I couldn't help the smile that crept across my lips.

"Looks like it's going more than fine," she laughed. "He was always a sweet guy. I think he's good for you, Bella. He'll take care of you. But I think we all knew that."

"We? Who is we?"

She looked over at the fields, as if thinking she said something wrong. "Mike, Tyler, Ben, and even Jessica and Lauren. After your first day, Mike told me he had a thing for you, but that he knew he'd never stand a chance by the way you and Edward looked at each other. Jessica told me she was mad because Edward liked you so much." She laughed. "And Lauren . . . well, Lauren wasn't happy about it, either.

"And I guess I knew you two would be together; if not soon, then eventually. You fit so perfectly together."

I blushed. "I'm glad you think so. It took me forever to convince my father that I really do love him."

"After losing your mother, I doubt he's willing to accept the possibility of you getting hurt," Angela said.

"He pretty much said that. Did your parents take much convincing of them to let you see Ben?" I asked.

"Not at all. They knew his grades were flawless, and they decided that mine were good enough to be able to earn the right to spend time with him."

"Lucky," I muttered.

She laughed. "I guess I am."

For the rest of the ride, a comforting silence surrounded us. When we finally arrived, we took a moment to decide what movie to see.

"How about the one with the woman who falls in love with a man, but he's forced to join the war?" Angela suggested.

"Anything but horror," I said. If I was going to watch anything mildly frightening, I would need Edward's neck to bury my face in. He would have to put his arm protectively around my shoulders, just like they do in mediocre romance novels.

I didn't take guts very well, you could say.

After paying for our tickets, we got a large tub of popcorn (with extra butter, as requested by Angela) and headed into the dark room. For the remaining fifteen minutes until the movie started, we chatted quietly. Angela told me about where she was thinking about going to college, and hoping that Ben would choose the same. I told her about my college choices.

Then she asked when I decided.

"Well, I . . . uh . . ." I sputtered. "Last night, I kind of, uh, slept at Edward's house."

She raised an eyebrow. "No, no," I said. "Nothing of that sort happened, even if we did sleep in the same bed, deliberately against my father's will. In fact, he didn't want me there at all, nor did he know I was there at all. But anyway, we were lying in bed this morning, and said that we should wake up like this more often. Angela, don't look at me like that." I wagged a finger at her faux-appall. "I said that that might not happen until college, so he asked me where I was thinking of going. I told Edward that I hadn't decided, so I asked him. He said somewhere in Chicago, since he grew up there. He suggested DePaul. If I can get a decently sized scholarship, I should be able to scrape through."

"I still am having trouble believing that you did that," Angela giggled, which was very unlike her.

"Did what?" someone asked. When I turned to see who had spoken, I saw Mike Newton, sitting in the seat beside me.

"Hey, Bella," he greeted me. "What's shakin'?"

"Hi, Mike," I replied. I couldn't be that harsh to the guy. I mean, it wasn't even his fault. It was probably a silly bet where he had been told to try and kiss me. And when he wasn't doing that, he wasn't so bad.

"Where's Jess?" Angela asked.

He looked at his hands for a moment. "We broke up."

There was sympathetic noise heard from both Angela and I.

"Yeah, but I think it was time. She'll be better with someone else," he said.

At that time, the movie previews began to play. As dark set into the room, Mike scooted closer to me. His proximity made me highly uncomfortable, but I thought it would be rude to say so.

As the movie went on, I gradually relaxed. Mike took this as a sign that I was alright with him being so close. He began the classic "why-don't-I-take-a-stretch-oh-look-your-shoulder" move that I had seen in so many movies and TV shows before. Why he laid his arm across my shoulders, I shrugged it off. This seemed to upset him.

"I'm going to the bathroom," I whispered to Angela. She nodded, still looking at the screen.

After I emerged from the bathroom, I was greeted by a smiling Mike.

"Hey," I murmured, walking past him, but his hand formed a vise-like grip on my arm.

"What's with you?" he asked.

"What?"

"You're being so cold," he accused.

"How, Mike?" I asked.

"When I was trying to keep you warm in there and be friendly, you pushed me away!"

"Mike, that was a more than friendly gesture," I grumbled.

"What if I want to be more than friendly?" he challenged.

I was starting to get terribly annoyed. "Then I suggest you find some self-control." I'm sure the grimace I bore was taking up my whole face. "Because quite frankly, I don't want you as more than a friend, Mike."

"Too bad," he muttered. In a swift movement, he crushed his lips to mine.

I've been kissed many times. Granted, every kiss was given to me by the same person. Never the less, I knew what a kiss should be like. No matter what kind of passion one feels, it should always be soft and beautiful. The sort of touch that every person seems to dream of sharing with another. Edward knew how to kiss someone. His lips were always moving harmoniously with mine, sending shivers creeping up and down my spine. He knew I loved that.

Mike, however, seemed to think differently.

He forced my mouth open with his lips, running his hands across my torso. I pushed against him in a desperate attempt to get his filthy hands off of my body. "Feisty," he growled against my lips. He had obviously taken my shoving against his chest as a sign of desire.

He moved his eager lips to my neck. I blinked at my surroundings. Instead of being a few feet from the bathroom, Mike had obviously moved us while we were fighting. I was now standing at the end of the hallway, far away from anyone.

No one was here to save me this time.

**Chapter End Notes:**

I know, I know! It's cliffalicious. :)


	23. Chapter 23

**note - this chapter is dedicated to _Godsgurl4146 _because she reviewed i think it was 3 chapters?**

"Mike, get off of me!" I screeched. In pure fright, tears were gathering in my eyes.

"No," he growled against the skin of my shoulder.

"Please, Mike, please," I begged.

He stopped for a moment. Hallelujah! "Oh," he laughed. "You want _more_?" Crap.

As his hands tugged at the bottom of my shirt, I felt the first tear fall. "Stop!" My body sagged. I was giving up. There was nothing I could do this time, no one to save me.

"Hey!" someone shouted. The voice was deep, and kind of husky. Mike froze. "I think she said stop, last I checked."

When I was able to peek around Mike, I saw a tall, lanky boy. He looked to be of the Quiluete tribe, with dark, russet skin. His expression was stern, his gaze fixed on Mike's quivering form, though he refused to take his arms off of me.

"Is this your friend, or something, Bella?" he asked the boy.

I shook my head. "No. I don't know him."

The boy turned to me, his grimace melting into a bright smile. I couldn't help but grin back. "I'm Jacob. Jacob Black." He held out his hand for me to shake. Mike slapped it away.

"I'm Bella," I whispered, glancing at Mike.

"Pleased to meet you," he said. "You, however," he turned to Mike. "I'm not so sure about."

"Like I care what you think, you little punk." Mike smirked, obviously pleased with his supposed wit.

"I don't want your approval. But you should get hers before you make a move. Usually when a woman says stop, they mean stop. You don't treat a woman like that."

"She wanted me," Mike boasted.

I snorted.

"Quiet, Bella," he ordered.

"Did you not hear what I just said?" Jacob demanded. "You shouldn't treat a lady like that."

"Well, how do _you _care for them?" Mike shot back.

"By taking her away from you." He grabbed my hand, pulling me down the hall. To me, he said quietly, "I'm sorry. But I don't want to see someone hurt like that. Even someone I don't know. Are you with someone? Do you need a ride? I came with a friend, but I'm sure he wouldn't mind you riding with us."

"No, no. I came with a someone. She can give me a ride back. In fact, I should go back in there. I've been out here a while."

He grimaced. "What if that boy comes back?"

"Do you mean me?" Mike yelled, running down the hall after us.

"Yeah, you," Jacob grunted.

"Well, she's my girl," he defended.

"I am not your girl, Mike. You know I'm happily dating Edward," I growled.

"Then why isn't he here?" Mike retorted.

"I came with Angela."

"I thinks it's because he broke up with you."

"No! That didn't happen."

He moved forward, reaching out to touch my face. "Don't deny it, Bella. We both know you're a girl with a broken heart. Besides, all he wanted was to get you in bed."

My head snapped upward, along with my hand. On the right side of his face, there was a large red mark in the shape of my hand. To be perfectly honest, I was probably more surprised than him. I was generally not a violent person at all, and I had just slapped Mike Newton. On the face.

"I hate you," I spat. "Good-bye, Mike."

"Owie," he whimpered, rubbing his face.

I snickered, and began to walk towards the room where Angela sat.

"Wait!" I heard Jacob call. He grabbed my arm again, spinning me around.

"Yes?" I was growing impatient. All I wanted was to be in Edward's arms at the moment, not being rescued from Mike's.

"Tell me your last name. I think I know you from somewhere."

"Swan. And I'm sure I don't know you."

"Hmm. You wouldn't happen to know Charlie Swan, would you?"

"He's my father," I replied.

"Then I do know you," he chirped.

"From where?"

"Your father and mine go fishing sometimes. You used to play with my sisters in the summer. Don't you remember me?" he asked.

I shook my head. "I'm sorry, but I don't." There was probably a reason. That reason being the crash.

He frowned again. "Alright. Well, maybe I'll see you sometime. And try to stay away from that Mike guy, okay?"

"I can take care of myself, thank you very much," I defended.

He snorted. "So why did I have to pull that piece of vermin off you?"

"Goodbye, Jacob," I said, walking away.

"Bye, Bella."

--

"So, do I really want to know what took you so long to get back from the bathroom?" Angela asked, tossing her soda into the trash. The great thing about Angela was that if you didn't want to open up about everything, she wouldn't force you to.

"No," I said quietly.

We closed the subject after that.

The rest of our car ride was silent, except for the music Angela had put on. It wasn't usually something I would listen to, but it was calming. _The reeds and brass have been weaving, leading into a single note,_ I heard Norah Jones sing. Her voice was small, but had a blues rhythm and undertone to it that made it irresistible. At one point, we both hummed to the gentle melody.

We pulled up to Charlie's house, sharing good-byes until next time.

"Thanks, Ang," I said, waving lightly.

"Bye, Bella."

"The mor-- Edward called," Charlie said as I walked in the door.

I jumped toward the phone.

"Hello, Masen residence," I heard Edward answer politely.

"Greetings, Mr. Masen," I purred.

"Hello, Ms. Swan," he laughed, his tone changing drastically.

"Charlie said you called earlier."

He hesitated. "Yeah."

"Well, spit it out, Edward."

"I told you she'd know," he said quickly.

"Huh?"

"My mother," he clarified. "I told you she'd know you were here."

"Oh."

"Yes. And she told me she'd like to meet you. Would you be willing to come over tomorrow afternoon?"

Wait-- I wasn't so sure if I really wanted to meet Edward's mother or not. It wasn't that I doubted she was as wonderful as her son, but simply the idea that she wouldn't like me. What if she thought I wasn't pretty enough for her god-like son? What if she thought I wasn't smart enough? The thousands of possibilities terrified me. Not being approved of by one of the most important people in Edward's life was an awful prospect.

"Bella, you still there?" Edward asked.

"Yeah, I'm here. I'm not sure, Edward. I just . . . I can't. What if she doesn't like me?"

To my surprise, he actually began to laugh. "You are truly absurd, love. Why wouldn't she like you?"

"Well, there's--"

"Bella, shut up," he ordered. "She will love you. I'm sure of it. You've met them before, but you don't remember it. She liked you enough then, so why wouldn't she now?"

"I killed her husband."

Edward sucked in a breath. "You didn't. You didn't mean to crash into him. It's not your fault."

"Yes, it is."

"As I said previously, shut up. You know that isn't true."

"But it is!" I argued. "I did that. I killed him, Edward. I killed him. Don't deny it, because I know that you know just how true it is."

"God, Bella. You need to stop with layering the guilt onto yourself, alright? _It's not your fault_."

"It is."

"Is not."

"Is too."

"Bella, stop!"

"Why should I?"

I heard him sigh. "For the sake of my sanity, please. You didn't kill my father."

"I did!"

"Bella, you're being stupid."

"What?" I gasped. Though it wasn't the biggest insult I had ever gotten, Edward never said those kinds of things.

"You know you didn't do it," he continued. "You're just being too damn stubborn to realize it."

"I did kill him, and that's that."

I slammed the phone onto the receiver. I was panting from shouting, and tears were gathering quickly in my lies. I _never_ fought with Edward. Never. We hadn't even so much fought over what we would have for breakfast. We were willing to sacrifice for the other, and willing to accept new ideas.

But now . . . I knew what I had done. Why couldn't Edward accept it? He should be yelling at me, saying he wants me to curl into the corner to shrivel up and die. I should be on my knees, groveling like a starving man for his forgiveness. But Edward wasn't the type of person who would do that, whether or not he hated the person at all. But I deserved every bit of hate he possessed and then some. I killed his own father, the man who would lead him though life with a smile. I took that away from him, and he chose not to acknowledge it.

Had this happened to someone else, it wouldn't have been this way. If, for instance, I dated Tyler Crowley, he would've left a long time ago, and rightfully so. But this was Edward. He didn't like to see others suffering.

"Bella, you okay?" Charlie called from his post in front of the TV.

I realized that I had been sobbing quietly. "Yeah, dad. I'm fine." I headed up the doors, shutting the door behind me. The shock of knowing that Edward was angry with me was turning the sobs into near hysterics. By the end of the hour, every drop of salt water in my body was on my pillow. I was haunted by a sense of déjà vu.

After hours of self-pity and shame, I finally slipped into the least enjoyable sleep of my life.

I awoke to the sun shining brightly through the window. The sun never shown in Forks. It was something I had come to peace with a long time ago.

"Bella, time to wake up!" Charlie yelled from the bottom of the steps. When I turned to look at my clock, I saw that it was 11:30.

"Good grief," I muttered. I knew I could sleep in late, but this was extreme, even for me.

I wandered down the stairs in search of chemically-enhanced and dangerously sugary cereal. It kept my stomach from growling, but I didn't taste any of it. I was too busy thinking of Edward.

"So, Bells," Charlie said, walking in the door. "I was thinking we could head down to La Push, and see Billy Black. You wouldn't remember him, but he also has a son named Jacob. He's about your age, maybe a year younger. Great kid."

"Alright," I said robotically, my tone painfully flat.

"There's a game at 1:00, so we'll head over in a while." He walked out of the room, and back by the TV.

I got dressed in a daze, my mind fuzzy and completely dead. Tears continued to leak onto my cheek. I felt like a cinder block, heavy and uncoordinated.

We drove down to La Push in Charlie's cruiser. He attempted to make small talk at a few points, probably sensing I was less than enthusiastic that morning, but they all fell flat. Asking me what my favorite color was wouldn't get my mind off Edward's yelling.

A grimace stayed on my lips until I saw Jacob waving at me from the outside of a small house. He was pushing the wheelchair of an old man.

"Hey, Bella!" he said cheerfully, smiling like the sun had come to visit.

"Hi, Jacob," I murmured.

"You know Jacob?" Charlie asked. He stood beside the old man.

Both Jacob and I looked down at our feet. We shared a silent exchange that telling about Mike was out of the question.

"Yeah," I muttered. "We met yesterday at the movie theater."

"Oh!" Charlie smiled. "That's great. You two will get along great. Billy and I are gonna go watch the game, but if you guys want to walk on the beach, that's fine with me. You, Billy?"

"Sounds fine," Billy agreed. He was wheeled into the house by Charlie.

"So . . ."

"How are you doing?" Jacob asked, flashing me another smile.

I hesitated, then answered, "Okay."

He frowned. "Really? Doesn't seem like it to me."

I looked up at him. The deep brown of his eyes seemed to know exactly what mine said. "No, I'm fine." I began walking towards the beach.

"Because everyone who is perfectly normal has tears on their face."

I gasped and looked away. Only then did I realize that my shirt was becoming wet from the excess water in my eyes. "I'm not crying," I argued. "I have something--"

"In your eye?" Jacob offered. He looked very amused, but not in a way that offended me.

"Yes." I stomped off into the sand. The tiny grains tickled the skin on my feet, and the water swished onto my ankles. The salt and humidity that surrounded me was calming.

"Look, Bells, I didn't mean to offend you, because I know you're sad. You don't have to tell me why, just don't lie to me."

I turned back to face him, fully aware that my cheeks were wet again. "I'm not sure if I want to talk about it . . ."

"Then we don't have to."

"But I need to." I paused and then added, "I need to know that someone besides me really cares at all."

"Shoot," Jacob said.

I took a deep breath and started. "I'll start from the beginning."


	24. Chapter 24

"Good Lord, Bella," Jacob breathed. He shifted on the log we had sat on sometime during my story-telling. "Let me make sure I have this straight. You fell in love with Edward, you got in a car crash with his father, lost your memory, he lost his father, you almost got-- uh . . . by Mike, Edward became Superman, you got back with him, and then you started fighting about whether or not you killed his father, and you ended up here with me."

"Yeah. Pretty much that." Jacob chuckled quietly, shaking his head of dark hair. "He just refuses to admit that I did something wrong. I'm not necessarily complaining, but I can't stand the fact that he tries to blame it on himself. He's a better person than he realizes."

"Sounds like a pretty lucky guy," Jacob murmured. "And you sound like a pretty self-conscious girl. You're the only person I know who would fight with someone over whether or not they killed their boyfriend's father, much less not fight for themselves."

I shook my head. "I guess you could call me self-conscious, but it comes with being in love with someone who is more perfect than you thought possible."

We sat in silence for a few minutes, watching the waves roll onto each other like children. After a moment of peace, I felt two warm arms wrap around my torso, hugging me tightly. Jacob had wrapped himself around my body, easily swallowing me in his embrace like a bug. Before I knew it, there were tears slipping onto his russet skin. I hated to cry in front of others. Then they knew that something was wrong, and the questions would start. But with Jacob, that clearly wasn't the case. He only gave reassurances and listened, possibly giving the occasional hug. I needed that sort of thing, not interrogation.

"Thank you," I said as he pulled away. "I guess I needed that."

"I think you did," he said. "But I understand. If I were fighting with someone like you, I'd be sobbing my guts out."

I blushed. "You'd hopefully realize what happened before we started fighting."

"Probably not. I can be dense when I chose to."

I laughed quietly. "So can I. It's just . . ."

"Just what, Bella?" Jacob pressed.

"I just wish he could know that having my memory gone is more of a . . ." I struggled for the right word, "punishment. I _killed_ his father, and he still refuses to admit that it's true. I have no idea of how I can make him see that it's _my_ fault, not his."

He shook his head. "I don't blame him, but I still don't think it's your fault."

"Huh?"

"You don't seem like the type of girl that would intentionally shove her car into her boyfriend's dad. You're not that bad. In fact, you seem kinda nice. I remember when you would come to play with Rebecca, and they would yell at me, but you would always tell them to stop. I guess I admired you for that when I was a kid."

I laughed in spite of my mood. "Thanks, Jacob. You seem pretty tolerable yourself."

We stood up and began walking down the beach.

"I'm sorry for unloading all of that on you," I said.

"It's fine, Bells," he said. "I'm no therapist, but I know that you shouldn't keep all that in there for long."

"I know, but who is there to tell? If I were to tell Edward, he'd only blame all of it and global warming on himself. Charlie is out of the question too, and my mother would positively have a fit if I told her about Edward. Not so much a fit as a tantrum that she didn't have as much time to pick out napkins for our wedding."

"You're getting married?" Jacob exclaimed. He had stopped walking to face me.

I took in a sharp breath. "God, no." I shuddered, frightened by the idea of a wedding being mine. It wasn't that I didn't love Edward. It wasn't that at all. In fact, I wanted to be his wife one day. I had never discussed it with him, because Angela had said that that scared most men to death. She probably had more experience and knowledge in that department, anyway.

But after knowing that my parent's relationship had crumbled to all but dust, making my mother the town's lunatic and my father one of the pitied, I was wary to say those two, fateful words myself.

"I'm not even sure where we are right now," I said. "I've never fought with Edward before. I have no idea of what he's thinking about right now, how he feels about me. Maybe he came to his senses." It probably sounded selfish to say it, but I almost wished he wouldn't.

Jacob's shock eased into a smile. "Bella, you worry too much. I know you guys will be fine. The way you talk about him makes it seem like he's some sort of angel or something."

I giggled and sighed.

"And I don't think that people who love each other that much could been broken apart. I dunno. Just a guess."

I laughed, and he wrapped me in a hug once again. "Thanks, Jacob," I murmured, pushing my nose into his shoulder. The grip he had on my torso was a bit tight. "You sure are a strong one."

He chuckled and released me. "Sorry."

"It's okay."

We walked back to the house, only to see that Charlie and Billy's game still had about an hour left. Personally, I didn't see the excitement in 200 pound guys trying to kill each other in the pursuit of a football.

"So did you kids have a nice time?" Charlie asked, his eyes still glued on the TV.

"Yeah, it was nice," I said. Jacob's arm was draped loosely around my shoulder. "We talked for a while."

"That's good," Charlie muttered, not really caring what I said, just focusing on the game.

"I'll show you my room," Jacob said. He walked down a narrow hallway, and entered a small room. There was a twin bed that took up almost all of the space. Jacob was a tall boy, and I had no idea of how he could maneuver himself in this space.

He laughed at my befuddled expression, and flopped onto the mattress. "Ah," he hummed. "This is the life."

"Certainly. Now tell me, how does such a large boy like you walk in such a small space as this?"

"Practice makes perfect," he answered simply.

"Whatever." I laid down beside him. "Do you have a girlfriend?" I asked suddenly.

"No. I mean, I've dated a couple of girls, but none of them seemed right. Too ditzy, too caught up in their hard knock life." I could hear the skepticism in his voice.

"Do you think you'll ever find someone you really, really love?" I asked. "Someone as special to you as Edward is to me?"

"Yeah." He flashed a goofy grin in my direction. "I will."

--

_(Note: this is maybe an hour after the "fateful phone call")_

Edward's POV

This was one of the worst things I had ever felt. Knowing that Bella was mad at me - possibly hated me - was grating at my insides, making it hard to breath. I needed to know that I was in her good graces, to know that she still loved me. I had lived once (during the time after the crash) when I thought she didn't know about me at all, only as the ghost that protectively watched her in school. But then I found out that, though she had no memory, she was still able to love me. But when I had broken it off before the crash, those were some of the darkest times I had ever experienced. A few times after my father died, I had even considered suicide. I would never tell Bella that, knowing how she would react.

Or, how she might of, had I not yelled at her. Which I knew now was a stupid move.

But I now knew that ending my own life was sick. Sick and disgusting. To stop one's one heart from beating is more a crime than stopping another's.

"Edward!" my mother called from down the stairs.

I opened the door and walked down the meet her. "Is she coming?" she asked.

I sighed, trying to think of a believable excuse. "No. She, er, had other obligations."

"Oh, alright. I wouldn't want to bother her, anyway." These were the times I loved my mother. Even after losing her husband, she could be so understanding. But there were those times . . . She had taken to staying out late with her friends and having a couple of drinks. Never enough to make her completely tipsy, but enough that I could hear the slur in her words. Which scared me. Having too much alcohol was what killed my father, and now my mom seemed to have no problem chugging it down.

I wanted to tell Bella this, but I wondered what she would think of me after that. Alcoholic parents? Probably not the most appealing thing to the love of my life.

From beside my bed, my cell phone began to belt out the last song Bella had so mischievously changed it to: "I Kissed A Girl" by Katy Perry. I knew we both despised the song, but Bella seemed to find it amusing when it started ringing in the middle of science class.

"Hello?" I grumbled miserably.

"Hey, Edward. How ya doing?" I heard Lauren Mallory giggle. I was ashamed to admit that I had dated this girl, though I would never admit that I did to Bella. Personally, I found her to be annoying.

"Fine, Lauren," I answered, my tone indifferent. Maybe if I seemed apathetic enough, she'd hang up. "You?"

"I'm good, now that you called." I could practically hear her eyelashes fluttering.

"Uh, Lauren, you actually called--"

Before I could finish my protest, she rambled on, "So, do you want to do something? We could go to a movie or, like, go to dinner." Her suggestion made me think of the times when Lauren and I had dated, simply out of my desperation to have friends. I wasn't ever attracted to her. I mean, she was pretty. Anyone could see that. But I didn't feel the same pull to her that I did to Bella; the need, the desire to love her. I hadn't ever told Bella about Lauren and I, but I didn't want her to. Knowing Bella, she would make up a ludicrous flaw that she had, and tell me that I deserved someone better than her. But Bella was far beyond perfect. Not only was she achingly gorgeous, but I couldn't help but love her spurts of sarcasm and wit, combined with her need to help everyone around her. Lauren lacked all of those traits.

I debated on hanging up. "Actually, I have some things at home I need to take care of."

"Oh." She sounded offended that she wasn't my main priority. "Is it that Bella of yours? Having to _entertain_ her or something? I mean, she doesn't seem to do much but hang out with you. Pretty clingy, if you ask me," she babbled. "I'm not that clingy. I'm, like, independent. You know? A strong woman."

"For the record, Bella is not clingy, and I am not _entertaining_ her." Lauren giggled at her little innuendo.

"True love waits, right?" Lauren laughed. "You act like such a virgin, Edward."

Good Lord.

"Right," I said sarcastically. "Because I'll sleep with anything that can walk."

"Naughty boy!" she growled into the phone.

"I was being facetious," I explained. This was getting tedious.

"Huh?"

"Sarcastic." Bella wouldn't have needed me to explain it to her . . .

"Oh, okay. So where is she, anyway?" Lauren demanded.

I sighed, opting for the truth. "We got in a fight."

She seemed to brighten after I said that. "Oh! So, does that mean we're up for dinner? I hear there's this great place in Port Angeles that has some yummy sea food."

"Lauren, no," I said firmly. "This doesn't mean we aren't together. We just had a small disagreement."

"Right," she giggled. "A _small disagreement_. So are we on?"

"Nope. Bye, Lauren."

"Wait! Let me just give you my number for when you realize what you're missing." She rattled off her cell number, then let me hang up.

After pacing my room for hours upon hours, I finally fell asleep in the early hours of the morning, completely afraid of what Bella would say to me tomorrow.

--

Bella's POV

My fingers shook as I opened the door of my truck, stepping onto the blacktop of our school parking lot. There that fresh, dewy morning smell in the air, misting down on me.

It was about 20 minutes before school began, but I was walking across the parking lot like I was late. Most Monday mornings, I would trudge along, only to speed up when I saw Edward smiling at me. But now, I was already heading toward his car, my apologies already thought out. But I wasn't ready. I wasn't ready to face Edward right now, even though I wanted to, and knew I needed to.

What if he told me to never talk to him again, to get out of his face? I couldn't take it if he did that.

But still, I tried to brave and hurried my way toward the gleaming Volvo.

He was just getting out of the door and grabbing his schoolbag from the passenger seat. He turned his head sharply when I called out, "Edward!"

But before I could catch the expression in his eyes, he turned away from me. "Edward Anthony, look at me!"

He spun around sharply. "Yes?" His eyes were cold.

"I'm sorry. For yelling at you, and hanging up on you. And for fighting at all."

To my surprise, he only sighed heavily. "Why do you keep apologizing for everything? Nothing that's happened is your fault."

"Good grief, Edward. It is, don't you see? Were you there when he died? How do you know I didn't intentionally ram into your father?"

"Because he was drunk!"

I backpedaled for a second. "W-What?"

"He was drunk. Intoxicated. Impaired." Edward's fists were clenched now, tight at his side.

I shook my head. Anyone who raised Edward must've been perfect. "It wasn't like that all the time, was it? Just a onetime thing?"

He laughed humorlessly. "No. It happened all the time. Usually once a week. Started when I was seven. You could've gotten killed by my own father, who was drunk. I almost lost you to him, Bella. Do you know what that felt like?"

"Edward, you're lying," I said. "No. That's absurd." I couldn't imagine Edward being raised by someone like that. He was too perfect.

"No, I'm not."

"But, I--"

"You didn't do anything, Bella!" Edward interrupted me. "Contrary to popular belief, you aren't a bad person."

"I yelled at you. That was bad," I argued half-heartedly.

"It was because I hadn't told you about my dad," Edward said. "So you it wasn't your fault, not in the slightest. Now tell me that."

I grimaced. "Tell you what?"

"Tell me that it wasn't your fault." He placed his had gently on my cheek, making me shiver pleasurably. He knew how his touch could affect me, and obviously planned to work with that.

Reluctantly, I muttered, "It wasn't my fault."

"What?" he joked. "I'm sorry, you'll have to say that louder."

I frowned at the smirk that lit his beautiful features. Only a smidgen more loudly, I said, "It wasn't my fault."

Edward took hold of my arms and pressed me gently against the side of his car. He put himself in front of me; actually, he sort of leaned onto me, but in a most enjoyable way. I could feel every muscle in his chest pressing against my body. He skimmed his nose along my jaw line.

"Say it, Bella," he murmured against my neck.

My breathing was heavy, most likely due to his proximity. The words came out shaky. "It, it wasn't my fault . . ."

"Louder, love." His lips seemed to linger on the idea of kissing my neck.

Once again, I sounded completely breathless. "Not my fault."

"Say it like you mean it," Edward ordered. Frankly, it was even a challenge to speak at all when he was so close to me.

With all my might, it finally came out stronger than a whisper. "It wasn't my fault."

"Very good," he chuckled. Tingles erupted throughout my whole body as I finally felt him kiss me.

"Ah . . ." I breathed, my fingers braiding themselves into his hair. He moved his lips from my neck to my ear, playfully biting at it as I had done not so long ago. My hands glided over his shoulders, reveling in their broadness. I loved to finger all of his muscles, and the perfect planes in his chest. My hand twisted to the side of his head, bringing his lips to mine. He placed both of his hands on the side of my face in a familiar movement.

We both pulled away, gasping. I laid my head on Edward's chest. "Sorry for yelling."

"S' okay," he said quietly. He wrapped his arms around me, squishing me even closer.

Behind me, I heard someone mutter, "Slut."

Edward released me as I spun around. "Excuse me?"

There stood - in all their popular glory - Lauren Mallory and Jessica Stanley, with Mike Newton. Both Jessica and Lauren had their arms crossed in a very stereotypical high-school mean-girl look. Lauren was very intimidating in looks. She was beautiful, that was easy enough to see. Her hair was long and blond, impeccably straight and shiny. Every feature of her face was perfect, as was the rest of her statuesque figure. Unlike me, she had curves in the right places, complete with a chest much bigger than mine. She was the ideal woman for someone like Edward: utterly gorgeous and much more confident.

Lauren was the first to speak. "I didn't say anything."

Mike smirked. "Last I heard, Bella was screaming. My name, to be exact."

I gasped. "You know that isn't true, Mike. The only thing I was screaming was for you to get the hell off me."

"Right. You were screaming for that Jacob guy," Mike chuckled.

Edward spun to face me. "Who is _Jacob_?" he demanded. His beautiful mouth was contorted into a frown.

"Mike was trying to . . . put on the moves on Saturday, and this guy came and pulled him off me. I didn't know him, and I certainly didn't do what Mike was suggesting. We talked for a while, and then Charlie took me to his house yesterday, because Jacob's dad knows Charlie."

"But nothing happened?" he pressed.

"Nothing happened," I assured him.

"I don't think Eddie can say the same," Lauren boasted. She stepped toward Edward.

"Huh?" I looked at him with narrowed eyes.

He sighed, glaring at Lauren as he turned to me. "Lauren and I . . . well, we dated in our freshman year, right when I first moved here. But trust me, Bella, it's not like we still have anything going like Lauren said. Yes, she called me, but we have nothing happening between us."

"Well, okay . . . If you're sure nothing is going on between you two." I didn't like the idea of knowing that Edward had once been Lauren's, his lips once kissed by hers.

"Nothing."

I gave him a look that said, _We'll discuss this later_.

"Was there something you wanted to talk about?" I asked, turning back to the three in front of us.

"No," Lauren said in her sickeningly sweet voice. "Come on, guys. We should probably let Eddie get back to _entertaining_ Bella." She winked at him, and walked away. I noticed the way her hips seemed to sashay more as she trotted off.

Wait-- _entertaining Bella_? What the heck was that about?

"You dated Lauren?" I practically screamed.

"Yes," Edward murmured, looking at his feet. "I didn't love her, just so you know. I was the new kid, and would take any attention I could get. I was desperate to make friends. And Lauren seemed welcoming enough, so I took her on a few dates."

"I hope I don't sound nosy asking this, but why did you split?" I asked.

"About half-way through sophomore year, I decided that I really wasn't feeling like I thought I should. You know, drowning in love, my heart about to burst, all that nonsense. I just didn't feel right being with Lauren."

"Ah," I murmured in assent. "How did she take it?"

"I never knew she had such a colorful vocabulary," he chuckled. "And she screamed it, too. Not the most pleasant thing I've experienced, I'll say that."

I laughed. "Surprisingly enough, I can imagine that. But she seems so . . . nice to you now. Overly-friendly, if you please."

He looked into the distance. "I suppose."

I grabbed his hand. "Let's go. School's about to start."


	25. Chapter 25

**note -** **some of my friends said i should put my e-mail on here so here it is e-mail if you want to ; - )  
**

Time seemed to slip by in the next two weeks. Before long, my junior year had only one week left. On every wall, there were signs that told seniors to order class rings, or to do well in their college lives. Freshman chatted to each other about being the "older ones next year" and "giving the newbies a rough year". The sophomores looked terribly bored, as if to say, _Damn, another year? _

Angela and her boyfriend Ben seemed to be excited for the summer, but I couldn't say that I blamed them at all. I was anxious to be able to not have classes in the way of my spending time with Edward. We could spend hours upon hours simply lounging around . . . or kissing, whichever he wanted. When I wasn't kissing Edward, I could also visit Jacob and his father in the summer while Edward was on vacation with his mother. He had told me that she wanted to take him somewhere, to hopefully forget about all that had happened this year. In early August, they would head to the Samoan islands for two weeks. Meanwhile, I would stay home and miss Edward. Maybe some time with Jacob would help, but it would still be a lonely couple of weeks.

"You know I want to take you," Edward had murmured after telling me about the trip. He scooped me into his arms and buried his face into my neck.

"I know," I sighed. "But I want you to have fun. It'll be good to spend time with your mother. You guys haven't had much time to really be a family."

"Yeah, but being with her doesn't mean that it will keep me from missing you. I want so badly to just put you into my suitcase. My mother wouldn't mind having you there. I wouldn't mind having you there. But I'll take you to the beach sometime. Just you and me, alone in paradise . . ." He kissed the side of my neck, then twisted me around to look at him. I shivered pleasurably when he said, "It could be just like _heaven_."

"You don't know how wonderful that sounds." I thought of Edward and I, curled into the white sands of some undiscovered beach.

But then I thought of the women there . . . "Just promise me you won't fall in love with an pretty Samoan girl when you're gone," I said seriously. I'd be surprised if Edward wasn't at all tempted, what with all of the statuesque women in bikinis, just roaming the beach for their next beau. I knew he wasn't the type of man to cheat, but he was still a man, and I couldn't blame him if he finally realized that his girlfriend wasn't all that beautiful.

He laughed loudly. "Silly Bella. How could I fall for any of them when I'm thinking about you?"

"Well, for one, they're very beautiful girls in very small swimsuits; two, you're a very handsome boy, so they will most likely begin seducing you before they know your name. I, however, do not posses and seductive qualities, and will be at home."

His face became serious, too. "Trust me, Bella. You are more seductive than you know. No spray-tanned girl in string could ever compare to you."

I snorted. "Mhmm. You keep on saying that, Edward."

He only shook his head and pulled me tighter to his chest.

I had seen Jacob a few times since then, our friendship becoming even more healthy. We talked about everything possible, from movies to pets to music. I seemed to have a hard time convincing him that he had terrible music taste.

"Bella, you know perfectly well that Slipknot is an amazing band," he growled. "Hell of a lot better than what _you_ listen to."

I felt like bursting out in a very valley-girl action, and saying, "Oh no you DI-IN'T!"

But instead, I only argued, "Uh, no, Jacob. They clearly are trying to be hardcore so much that they can't manage to find time to play their instruments. Muse, however--"

"Good grief, Bella!" Jacob sighed. "Muse, Muse, Muse. There is more to life than Muse!" He threw his hands up in the air.

"Blasphemy!" I cried playfully. "But yes, there is more to life. Examples being 30 Seconds To Mars, Linkin Park, Jimmy Eat World, My Chemical Romance, Mae, Jack's Mannequin, Paramore, Armor For Sleep, Incubus--"

"Slipknot," Jacob cut in.

"No," I said. "If you're going to listen to any form or concentration of metal, I would suggest some Evanescence, but maybe Thrice would be good for someone like you."

"Evanescence?" he snorted. "What do you take me for, Bella? Some sort of pansy?"

"For your information, _Jacob_--" I sneered the name, "that is some amazing music. Amy Lee's voice is beautiful, and the lyrics are also quite good."

"Well, _Bella_," he chuckled, "I think it stinks."

I sighed. "Okay, _Call Me When You're Sober_ does stink, but most of their stuff is pretty decent. Try _Cloud Nine_. Maybe _Imaginary_."

"Can we talk about something other than pansy music?"

"Shut up, Jacob."

"Why?"

"Because I pack a pretty mean punch, that's why," I threatened.

He bent over laughing. When his gasps finally died down enough for him to talk, he said, "Please, Bella! Like you could even make dent on me. You'll hurt yourself, darling."

My fists were clenched tightly, though I wasn't even thinking about hurting him. "One day, Jacob Black, you shall taste my utter fury in the form of your broken nose. And when you do, I will giggle," I huffed. In truth, if I did in fact punch Jacob and hurt him, I would be apologizing before I could pull my hand back. He was quickly becoming my best friend, and I would rather die than see him in pain.

He rolled his eyes. "Mhmm. Sure, sure."

"Slipknot still stinks, you know," I reminded him.

He grimaced. "Whatever, Bella. One day you'll see that _I am _right, and you got it wrong for once."

"Shut up, Jacob."

--

I sighed and collapsed onto the couch. Edward sat down beside me. We were in my living room, and Charlie wasn't scheduled to be back for an hour.

"You seem stressed," he noted. I curled into his open arms.

"I just can't believe how much time has gone by." I traced the muscles in his arms mindlessly. "So much has happened in only six months. I can't keep up with all this. Even my mother doesn't really know about you yet."

Edward cocked an eyebrow. "Your mother doesn't know that we're dating?"

I shook my head. "Nope."

"But, it isn't that standard protocol?" Edward asked. "I mean, isn't that how it's supposed to work?"

"I have no experience in that area," I laughed. "You're my first boyfriend, remember?"

"Really?" He looked skeptical, but I had no idea why. People didn't treat me like pariah, but most guys simply showed no interest in getting to know me well. I didn't really have any interest in them, either. The closest I had come to liking someone like that before Edward was Romeo. He was the reason I had the play _Romeo and Juliet _memorized.

"Yeah," I answered. "You're the first one I've ever felt this way about." I blushed and looked toward the floor.

He lifted up my chin with his finger so that I was looking into his eyes. "You don't know how big my ego is right now," he said.

I giggled quietly. "Glad to be of assistance in improving your self-confidence."

He pressed his lips to mine for a few blissful, perfect seconds. When he pulled back, I crossed my arms over my chest. "Why'd you stop?" I demanded impatiently.

"I'm not sure," he said. "We could do it again, if you want."

I grinned devilishly. "That would be lovely."

I pushed him back so that he was lying down. I lowered myself onto his perfect body. My hands went to the sides of his face, and touched his lips lightly. But as soon as our skin made contact, I forgot everything. Our kiss became rough and passionate, Edward just as into it as I was. He flipped us over so that I was beneath him, but held himself so that I didn't feel his weight. Yet somehow, I could feel each achingly perfect muscle that his body had.

Before I could stop it, a moan had escaped my lips. I stopped for second, but it only seemed to make Edward even more willing to kiss me harder. He didn't seem to notice when my hands slipped up his shirt to feel the toned muscles that lay underneath the cloth. I could spend forever simply tracing Edward's chest. It wasn't like a body-builder's, but from all the sports he did, the strength he was capable of was evident. When I thought of the physical power he possessed, my fingers started to shake. It put me into a state of awe.

But what scared me was when _his_ hands went up _my_ shirt.

Did he simply want to do what I was doing with him? To only feel the other's skin on their fingers? Or did he want something more? Truthfully, I wasn't ready if he did want . . . more.

He felt me tense under him, and removed his hands from my stomach quickly. "I- I . . .sorry," he apologized quickly.

"No," I said, and took his hand gently in mine. "It's okay. Just surprised me."

"I still shouldn't have done it." He got up off me and straightened his not-so-straight shirt. "Sorry, Bella. I'm sorry."

"No, it's fine," I assured him quietly. Frankly, I wasn't sure it was okay. But either way, I didn't want him to leave. I had done the same to him by shoving my hands onto his chest.

"Edward!" I called. "Wait! You don't have to leave. Please." I grabbed onto his arm. "It just surprised me. I'm not used to you doing it."

"I don't have to do it if you don't like it."

"No," I protested. "It's fine. I just . . ." I took in a sharp breath. "You weren't . . . you weren't wanting . . . you know--"

He pulled back sharply. "Bella Swan!" he barked. "You _know_ I wouldn't ask for that if you didn't want it. I will _never _force you into that."

I nodded. "Of course."

He reached for the door knob. "Why are you leaving?" I whined.

"I don't know, really. But I . . . I'm sorry. I need to go think, or something."

I sighed. "Must you, Edward? I know now that you didn't want anything else, so there's no reason that you can't stay, correct?"

"Bella . . ."

"Yes?"

"I don't want to do something that I'll regret. I know that you aren't completely okay with what I just did."

"I'm f--"

"Bella," he said sternly. "No, you aren't fine with it."

"Yes I am." Edward gasped when I took his hand and placed it on my stomach, right beneath my shirt. "See? Fine"

"Look at me and tell me that it doesn't make you uneasy in the slightest." He used his finger to tip my face up so that I was looking directly into his green eyes.

"I-- I . . . Okay!" I threw my hands up. "It scares me, all right? But only because the first person who did it to me wouldn't stop if I wasn't fine with it." I was obviously referring to Mike. "All Mike wanted from me was that. I don't love him like I love you, but he thought otherwise. I screamed at him, Edward! And I cried. He still wouldn't stop. At all."

"Bella, I-- I mean, I knew, but I--" Edward fumbled with his words, something he rarely did.

"Yeah, I know. You knew, but you didn't?" I shook my head. "It was scary, was all. And even though it's you - the man I love - it still felt like that. You know that Jacob guy Mike was talking about? He saved me last time. When Mike tried again. Without him . . . I can't even imagine."

"Bella, I didn't mean to make you remember that. I would never want to try to bring up that memory." He buried his face in his hands. "I can't believe I did, though. I'm such a monster."

"But you didn't do it intentionally," I added. "You were just repeating my actions."

"I highly doubt that our intentions were the same."

"What?" I asked. "Didn't you just say that you didn't want anything . . . more?"

"Bella, I wasn't wanting to bring up that memory, but I am a man. I want to be with you that way, I won't lie. I meant it when I said that you were seductive. But believe me, if you don't want it, I won't ask for it. Especially after what you told me." His eyes focused on mine. "Bella, please forgive me. I'm sorry for making that mistake and being so . . . impatient."

"There's nothing to forgive."

"But there is," he muttered. "You know what really kills me, though? It's that some of your only memories are things like that. Those horrid things. You should be able to remember your childhood, your schools, your mother."

"Should I insert some sort of agreement?"

"Bella, I don't want you to live with only these things. I want to get your memory back."

"_What_?" I gasped.

"You deserve memories. I'll find a way to get them back. I promise you, Bella, I will." He seemed to be reassuring himself more than he was reassuring me.

"O-- Okay," I stumbled. "But how?"

"I don't know . . ." Edward mumbled.

"That's okay. You don't have to get my memories back, Edward."

"What?" he whispered. "Of course I have to! I was the one who made you lose them."

"That was your father," I reminded him.

"So? I still am responsible, and won't sleep well until you have each tiny little piece of your memory back."

"Don't trouble yourself over it."

"Bella." He took my face gently in his hands. "Do you know what it felt like to be a kid and dance around the house in Disney Princess costumes? Do you know what it felt like to go to middle school for the first time? Do you remember the first time you read _Romeo and Juliet_? No, you don't. I want to give that to you! Please, Bella, let me do that for you. Please." He kissed my lips softly.

"Okay," I breathed shakily from his proximity.

"Thank you." He kissed me once more, just a bit longer. He kept his hands on the side of my face and kept the kiss clean.

"Edward, I said not to put your hands beneath my clothes, not that you couldn't kiss me properly," I shot in as he pulled back.

"Properly?" He cocked his head to the side. "I don't know if I understand that term. Why don't you explain? Or better yet, show me?" It surprised me from how quickly his mood changed from anxious to coy. Not that I minded.

I spun around and grabbed his upper arm. He could've easily slipped right out of my grasp, yet I knew he would let my fingers stay. "Show you?" I gasped playfully. "I don't know, Edward. Not sure I want to."

He spun us around so that I was the one pressed against the wall. "Really, Bella? You seemed so excited to show me just a minute ago. Where's the enthusiasm?" His warm breath flew against my ear like silk, and made me shiver pleasurably. "I'm not sure if I want to show you, either. I'm not motivated enough, I guess."

"Edward!" I whined childishly.

"Fine, love."

Edward scooped me into his arms and placed me gently on the couch. I hit the soft cushions with an "Oof!". He lowered himself on top of me, yet made sure that I felt none of his weight. He placed his hand on the back of my knee and brought up to his hip.

I gasped.

He nudged my face upward with his hand, and began to kiss my neck while running his fingers up the side of my body. I reacted by entwining my fingers in his hair, and stealing a quick nip at his ear. He growled into my skin and began to kiss me more fervently, more passionately. The pressure of his lips was sending confusing emotions throughout my body, but some were more enjoyable than others.

There was a loud slamming sound that startled both of us.

"What the--"

I moved my head to roll my eyes at Edward. It was just our luck that Charlie would walk in while Edward's lips were at my neck and my legs were around his waist.

But, for some reason, I was okay with it. Edward didn't seem terribly embarrassed or angry, either. Because I'd have plenty more time to kiss with Edward, times when Charlie wouldn't be there, when no one else would be there.

In fact, we'd have the rest of our lives to kiss when no one was watching.

Just us and forever.

**Chapter End Notes:**

In case you couldn't tell by that sappy ending, this is the last chapter, not counting the epilogue, which I am working very hard on _also my friend and i made a story it's a one- shot and very funny her username is **bboorreedd **and the story is called gotta love tv_


	26. Chapter 26

Roughly a year later

"You look great, Bells."

I straightened the already crisp, yellow graduation gown. "Thanks, Dad." It would look hideous on anyone, but Edward probably still looked achingly gorgeous. While I looked like a wrinkled banana in a matching hat.

Despite the atrocious clothing, I was jittery with anxiety. Not exactly excitement (I was too afraid that I would trip across stage for it to be a wholly positive energy), but some strange emotion that kept my fingers tapping and my impatience growing. I was also not enjoying the fact that I hadn't seen Edward in over 24 hours. Last night, Tyler Crowley had called him and basically said, "Man, we're done with high school. Let's PARTAY!" So, Edward rode with a few of his friends (19, to be exact - Edward was good at making friends) to Seattle to dance in a few clubs. I knew they wouldn't get drunk or too rowdy; Tyler was a good guy, and didn't want to see his friends get hurt by driving drunk.

Though I knew that I wouldn't be called about Edward getting charged with DUI, my nails were almost non-existent from the torture of knowing that he could be injured somehow, some way . . . and I wasn't completely sure that Tyler was nice enough to pick bars without strippers.

I heard a familiar clacking of heels on the hardwood floors. "Bella, you look lovely!" Renee squealed. "I would hug you right now, but I don't want to mess up your hair. Lord knows how long it took me to get it to curl just that much. But your makeup . . . Your makeup could use a bit of work. That lipstick is a bit heavy, don't you think? Here," she handed me a napkin to press my lips to, "use this. There! Perfect." She smiled warmly at me.

I had missed my mother so much. This was the first time I had seen her since moving to Forks. She arrived in the drizzly, dreary town (she made no effort to conceal how much she hated this drizzly, dreary town) late last night. We talked until the early morning hours, and it showed beneath my eyes in the form of bruise-like shadows. But it was worth it to catch up completely with my mother. She and Phil were happy together. His career was going well, and he had been signed to some baseball team that I hadn't heard of, but I was simply glad that he was able to make my mother smile. She had always been a generally perky person (even before she met Phil), but there were the times when she mourned her love for Charlie. When she had left Charlie, part of her was still completely in love with him. We never lingered on that fact. Then, in some bit of a miracle from God, she met Phillip Dwyer. He had barely left her alone at all after he proposed, but my mother seemed to enjoy his presence more than anything else. The way she made goo-goo eyes at him was enough for my satisfaction.

"Mom, you look great, too," I complimented her. And she did. I was always told that I was the "spitting image of my ma", but she was much more attractive than I was. She was also more outgoing, though that didn't always amount to something to be proud of.

"Thanks, Bella," she laughed. "So . . . This Edward guy? Do I get to meet him today? I should, seeing as you've been dating him for a year and a half - without telling me!" She shook her head.

"Hey, I told you in March, so it was just little over a year," I protested, wagging my finger.

She wagged her finger back at me. "Still! You should've told me before. You know that these things should be discussed."

"You'll still get to meet him," I protested. "And I know you'll approve of him."

"Just assure me that he doesn't do drugs or have a Mohawk," Renee pleaded jokingly.

"Mom!" I exclaimed. "Of course not. He's amazing, really. Top student, sweet . . . attractive . . ."

"Oh!" Renee giggled. "Well, so long as he's good in school."

"Top of the class," I reminded her. "He'll be valedictorian today." I thought of my Edward, gripping the edges of the podium, speaking profoundly in his clear, velvet voice.

She grinned. "Good. I don't want you being with anyone stupid."

"You don't need to worry about that. He's already gotten full scholarship to DePaul." I had actually done the same, with tutoring and extra studying (by myself, of course. The only thing I would've learned if I studied with Edward would have been how amazing his kisses were), I had gotten myself almost completely paid for. The scholarship paid for over three quarters of it. Instead of being at square one like I had after the crash - I couldn't even read - I was now able to pass a college sophomore test (my tutor had said so after we discussed college curriculum). Edward was more than thrilled when I told him about my accomplishment, as was I for him. Not that there was ever any doubt in his intellectual abilities.

"Bells, Renee!" Charlie hollered from the bottom of the stairs. "We have to go, or we'll be late!"

Our ride to the high school was silent, but the emotions that clouded the air were almost tangible. I was jittery, almost excited; Renée could barely hold in her joyous giggles; Charlie actually seemed depressed. Though I was sad to leave him, I wanted to experience college with Edward and get the education I needed, in hopes to get the career I desired.

Inside the building, things were an absolute blur. Teachers were running like madmen with papers in their hands, commanding students to stand there, or do that. Some of them simply looked relieved that this was our last time in there. I was somewhere in the middle. Not yet ready to leave, yet not wanting to stay.

"Ms. Swan!" Mr. Banner called. He jerked is finger over to my left. "Behind Mrs. Stanley, please." I slipped in between Jessica and a boy named George.

"Hey, Jess," I said quietly, tapping her shoulder.

She spun around at the sound of her name. "Oh, Bella!" There were tears in her eyes. "It's the end of high school! We're done. I- I can't believe it." She sniffed. "I don't want to leave you and the rest of my friends. You have to write, okay? We'll write all the time. We'll stay in touch, and we'll be best friends forever. Just like in the movies. So promise me you'll write."

I smiled back. "Okay. I can do that. Go to college and have fun, though. Don't just think about me or anyone else that's here. Except for Mike - stay with him. You two are good for each other."

I had found out that Jessica and Mike were a couple in April, when I walked in on their janitor closet rendezvous (definitely not an experience I relished). Though I despised Mike for obvious reasons, Jessica had done nothing to me. I was happy for her and Mike.

"I will," she cried. "We're going to be friends for the rest of our lives, okay? For forever."

I nodded. "Okay."

"Students!" someone yelled, raising their hands. "You guys know what'll happen. They play the pretty music, you walk in, speech, blah blah blah, happy happy happy, go home. Got it?" There was a fervent head shake throughout the line.

We all brushed ourselves off and wiped away tears. The doors into the auditorium opened. I peeked around the other students ahead just in time to see Edward flash me a wink. I blushed and look down at my feet.

"Ladies and gentleman," I heard the principal say grandly into the microphone. "Our graduating class."

As I walked down the aisle of the crowded auditorium, I couldn't help but think of some of the events that had transpired since I had arrived in Forks. Or rather, the precious things that I could actually remember.

_Flashback_

"_Ugh. Stupid potato."_

"_Bella, love, be careful or you'll hurt the wires," Edward reminded me. His fingers glided effortlessly over the plump vegetable and the wires. He could've done this in his sleep._

"_Your concern for my safety is simply heart-warming," I snapped, and attempted to untangle the electrical wires from my fingers and arms._

_For a "fun day", as Mr. Varnercalled it, we were making potato clocks. We hadn't been five minutes into the project before I had gotten myself a minor shock and muttered a very naughty word. Actually, it was more of a naughty rant. Edward seemed to have found that highly amusing, though I was quite chagrined._

"_I've never heard you cuss before," he observed, chuckling._

_I turned to glance at him. "Sorry," I apologized sheepishly. "Probably not the most appealing thing." _

"_No," Edward said. "It's actually sort of . . . sexy, as awful as that sounds." He shrugged. _

_My mouth popped open. "You think it's . . . sexy?"_

_He looked down at the potato and began to work with the wires, avoiding my gaze. "Yes," he mumbled._

_To his surprise, I laughed. He turned to me with his eyebrows raised and said, "You know, I never have any idea of what you'll do next. First you blow out a phrase that would make a sailor blush, then I call you sexy and you laugh! What is up with that?"_

_I giggled again. "I don't know, honestly. It just surprises me that you would think that something like that is attractive. I would've thought that you hated curse words."_

_He swooped down to kiss my cheek. "Not when you say them," he purred against my skin. His velvety voice dropped low and husky. It was the most beautiful noise I had ever heard._

_I shivered in pleasure. _

"_You know," Edward continued, "Mr. Varner just left the room." His hot breath flowed across my cheek and onto my ear._

"_What a coincidence," I noted, and dove for his lips._

_He ducked away playfully, so my lips on caught the side of his head. "Ah, ah, ah, Bella. With all these people watching? No." He smiled coyly at me._

"_Just a quick one?" I asked. "Please, Edward." But, since I was at the side of his head, I would need no begging. With one quick nip at his ear lobe, he was putty in my hands. But before I started my simple (yet brilliantly entertaining) procedure, I simply kissed his cheek. He seemed shocked by the contrast between the touch of my lips on his face and my teeth on his ear._

"_Now will you kiss me?" I asked._

"_Mmmm," he sighed._

_My lips moved slowly towards his. The anticipation of the kiss was about as sweet as the kiss itself. _

_But before our skin could make contact, my elbow knocked against the insane lump of wires, sending it crashing to the floor. Edward threw his head back, laughing boisterously._

_I said a naughty word again._

_End flashback_

We sat in the first eleven rows, ready to move up to receive our diplomas. But before we could be officially shoved out of Forks High School, Edward would have to make his speech.

He seemed confident as he approached the podium. There was a wild round of applause and encouraging shouts.

As soon as the audience ceased clapping (and Jessica stopped her cat calls), he began.

"Thank you," Edward began softly. "That reassurance was needed. The pressure is almost suffocating, trying to sum up the reasons of why we'll all become successful entrepreneurs," he chuckled. The joke seemed to set the crowd at ease, too. I noticed that his hands held no note cards, no sticky notes. He would be speaking to over four-hundred people by memory.

Yet, as he began his official speech, he didn't hesitate at all. His velvety voice was clear, free of the anxiety that seemed to only be tangible to me.

"Look at this," he grinned, his expression colored by marvel. "So many people, all here for the same purpose, all of them smiling. The students, too. Glowing, even. Everyone seems to be so happy. Happier than I've ever seen you before. Much more cheerful than when I saw you in school. Which really makes me sad, considering that the only time I get to see you truly happy is when you're leaving everyone behind. Because when I saw you in class, at lunch, or with a teacher, you were miserable.

"Maybe it's because you hated high school. Scratch that-- I _know_ you hated it.

"Which is frightening to think about, considering that it means that you wasted four years of your life, mulling over how terrible everything is. I realize that not everyone did. I know a lot of my friends, myself included, loved high school. Not necessarily the learning itself, but the fact that we knew we were changing, and that our lives were coming into place.

"But some of you? You didn't. You ignored the opportunities and abused your rights, and made things worse than even _you_ thought they could be. Your sights were set on the exit doors. Your desperation to get out of this place was scary. At least, to me it was.

The atmosphere had become a bit tense; with a statement like that, it was typical that he would lose a few people. But he continued confidently.

"Which is why I want to ask you something. Most of you will spend four years in college - enjoy them. You wasted four years here, being miserable and doing nothing about it. And how many of you want to do it again in college? So much will happen. You'll find the rest of your life-" he looked down to wink at me "-if you haven't already. Love, a career, friends . . . All in four years. Don't waste it as terrified little kids who want nothing more than to be carted out. If you enjoy those four years, you'll enjoy the rest of your life."

There seemed to be one fervent, simultaneous nod from the audience. I found myself thinking, "You're right."

"Let's be honest; raise your hand if you wasted your time here," he commanded. Dignity rang out beneath the echoes that his voice cast throughout the room.

Over half the students raised their hands, and quite a few adults joined them in their confessions. "Don't lie to me," Edward added. More hands went up.

For a moment, I thought. Had I wasted part of my high school years? Maybe I had before the crash, maybe not. But from what I could remember, I had used every second as best as I could. Either with Edward or studying. That seemed to be something productive, something worth while. So I kept my hands in my lap.

"Now raise your hand if you won't waste college on wallowing in your own sadness."

Every hand was raised, including mine.

--

"Bella!"

I spun around. "Jacob!" I squealed. I maneuvered as best I could through the clusters of people. He scooped me into his arms and did a spin himself. "I'm so glad you came!"

"And miss my best friend's graduation?" he scoffed. "You should know me better, Bells."

"Oh well." I hugged him tighter. "I'm just glad I get to see you. Have you grown - _again_?"

He chuckled at that. "Of course. I'm Six foot seven now, you know."

"Good grief," I exclaimed. "Over a foot taller than me."

"Isn't everyone?" he laughed.

"That was unnecessary," I shot back with venom. He laughed loudly and set me onto the ground.

"But it was amusing," he replied, knowing it was true.

"So you would sacrifice my happiness for your own _amusement_?" I screeched jokingly.

"Of course."

"Congratulations, Bella," I heard someone say. Charlie smiled warmly as I thanked him. "You're growing up so quickly. I know that's said often, but it's true."

"You know that I won't forget about you in college, dad. I'll miss you so much when I'm away." I pulled away from him to talk with Billy and Renee. After a couple minutes, I decided that I should find Edward and congratulate him on his speech. The last I had seen of him was when he shook our principal's hand after receiving his diploma. My eyes had followed him until he was lost amongst the group of other students.

"Edward?" I called out. It wasn't too large of a crowd; I would find him soon. "Edward!"

I wove through the crowd, managing to accidentally collide into a few graduates. "Edward?" I yelled out again.

"Yes?" a velvet whisper came in my ear.

I gasped. "Don't do that again, Edward; you scared me!"

Edward chuckled into my collarbone. I shivered as his lips found skin. "Whatever you say, love."

"I say that you should stop kissing me like _that_," I suggested breathlessly. He only wound his arms tighter around my waist, but still kept his grip gentle.

"Like this, maybe?" I felt his tongue glide along with his lips, high and higher up my neck.

"I-- I think . . ." My voice was so shaky, no authority at all. "Maybe not with my mother, father, and your mother around."

"Oh," he laughed and moved his lips to my forehead. "Maybe you're right."

I turned around to face him. "You were amazing up there, you know. You had the audience by the first sentence," I informed him. "And the topic was genius."

For once, it wasn't me who blushed - it was Edward. My fingers touched his pink cheek. "I wish I could've taped it. Everything that you did was amazing. But weren't you nervous at all? You sounded so confident . . ."

"Trust me, sweet, I was nervous beyond belief. To know that it wasn't just my friends watching me, but my girlfriend--" I giggled as he said that "--, her father, her mother, her best friend, and his father. It wasn't easy, I can say."

"You know that my parents wouldn't ever utter anything against you." I objected.

He seemed to speak my thoughts exactly for the thousandth time. "Your mother might not, but your father usually has something slightly negative to say."

"I won't let him."

"Is that so?" Edward cocked an eyebrow.

"Yes."

He laughed and kissed my hair. "If you say so. Now, I would love to meet your mother."

"Mind you, she is slightly eccentric," I warned him.

"And out-going," he added quietly.

"How did you know that?" I asked him. I had told him little of Renée, other than the basic facts like her remarriage.

"You told me on our first date; I had taken you to a Muse concert," he smiled sadly. I yearned to know what made him so drastically gloomy. If only I could be inside that mysterious mind of Edward Masen's . . .

"I wish I could remember," I said softly. "But it makes me happy that you do. It also makes me happy to know that I'm not dating anyone with awful music taste." That made him break out in a genuine smile. "Now come; Renée will be excited to meet you."

I took his wrist and led him towards Charlie and Renée. Charlie glanced at Edward, then returned his attention to Billy. Renée, however, seemed quite ecstatic to see Edward. I didn't have to introduce him for her to know who he was.

"Oh, Edward! It's so nice to finally meet you!" she squealed. Instead of taking the hand Edward had put out for her to shake, she ignored it and hugged him tightly. Luckily, he merely seemed pleasantly surprised. "Bella has told me so much about you." She leaned to whisper in my ear, "You were right about the attractive part." I giggled and looked at my feet.

"Well, it's lovely to meet you, too, Mrs. Dwyer. Bella has also told me about you. All positive things, of course."

They chatted for a few minutes, inducing a few peals of laughter from both parties. Edward later told me that my mother was "certainly entertaining, and highly intelligent - just like her daughter". I told Edward that kissing up would get him nowhere.

After we talked for while, Charlie suggested we go to The Lodge. The Lodge was - in my opinion - overpriced and overdone. Full of dismembered animals decorated the walls, along with fishing poles and antique sports memorabilia. It smelled thickly of meat and Coke, with just a touch of sweat. Overall, I was not fond of The Lodge. But Charlie wanted to go, and this would be only part of the short time I had before I left for college.

"Are you riding with me or Edward?" Charlie asked, swinging his keys around his fingers.

I looked at Edward. "I'll ride with you," I told him.

He grinned, then turned to Charlie. "If it's all right with you, Bella and I are going to stop by my house and pick up something. My parents will meet you there; they're going separately."

"That's fine," Charlie said with a speck of doubt in his voice, then got in his car.

"So, what're we _picking up_?" I chuckled as Edward and I got into his car.

"You'll see." He winked at me, making my heart beat dangerously fast. "But we are stopping at my house."

"Edward . . ."

"Bella . . ."

I sighed. "You wouldn't think of telling me, would you?"

"Of course not. This won't be fun if I don't." He pulled up beside the curb. "Now wait here."

He hopped back in less than a minute later. In his hands was a strip of black cloth. "Turn around," he ordered.

I did as he said. I felt both his hands and the black cloth touch my neck, and then touch the back of my head. He was tying the cloth around my head as a blindfold.

"Edward!" I cried. "I don't like the idea that whatever we're doing requires a blindfold."

"But you will when you see," he murmured into my ear. "You'll love it."

I let out a dramatic huff. "Fine."

Edward chuckled. "At times, I think you're 40. But at others, I could swear you're three."

"Shut up."

"As you wish, my little toddler."

--

Throughout the ride, I attempted to rely on my hearing for information, but that seemed to fail. All I could hear was the gentle purr of the engine, and the CD Edward had put on. Instead of trying to figure out our location, I simply listened to his humming, and occasional joining in the words.

After driving for what felt like hours, I realized that Edward had probably never planned to go to The Lodge. Which I was completely fine with, to be frank. What would Jacob say to me when I saw him next? Possibly something along the lines of, "You suck." Charlie might be slightly angered (understatement of the year, anyone? I think so), but if we had been driving this long, it most likely meant that Edward and I could be alone together, which we hadn't gotten to do in quite a while. And with college so close . . . I hoped desperately that in the midst of chaos, that we could still be with each other.

Edward's voice broke through my thoughts. "We're almost here," he told me.

I felt the car come to a stop, and heard Edward get out. His hand grasped mine, and helped me get out of - er, stumble out of - the car. It wasn't pavement beneath my shoes; it felt more like gravel.

"I'll take off your blindfold now. You might want to be able to see."

I blinked, my eyes readjusting to the light. Miraculously, the sun had begun to peek through the thick blanket of clouds. I smiled as the light fell over my skin - I had missed the warmth.

In front of me was the Volvo, Edward leaning on it. Behind them

"Let's go," Edward whispered, and took my hand.

"Aren't we taking the trail?" I asked, pointing to the worn path.

He just continued to lead me toward the thick foliage, devoid of any path. "Of course not," I muttered.

As we traveled through the trees and wildflowers, I began to get a sense of déjà vu. Something itched at the back of my mind, giving me a headache. I just couldn't completely grab what was before it flitted off. Which angered me - quite thoroughly.

But . . . I couldn't have been here before. Could I have? Noted, I couldn't remember over sixteen years of my life, but . . . I felt it. I had been here before. I just didn't know when, or with whom, or how I got there. Which, in a way, was frightening. I knew this place, yet I didn't. Confusing.

I decided to ask Edward. "Have we . . . Have we been here before?" I inquired.

"Yes," he replied, glancing back at me. His blazing green eyes seemed to be relieved, almost. Like the idea in my mind, I couldn't quite grasp his expression.

"When? Was it with you?" I felt impatient, and I desperately wanted to know where Edward was dragging me off to.

"Yes. You'll remember this place when we get there. But you won't remember this part of it." Something about his tone made me less irritated; maybe it was the fact that he sounded like he wasn't in this forest with me. It was as if he was somewhere distant, somewhere I'd never be able to go.

As a way to get my mind off Edward's mood and the fact that I tripped about every five minutes, I attempted to enjoy the scenery. Beneath the horrid green that blotted every surface within sight, I saw tiny flowers that peeked from beneath the earthen floor. The colors were vibrant and vivid, making me wonder why I hadn't seen them before. I longed to stroke the petals, out of pure curiosity as to what their texture was. Some looked as if to be light like the wing of a moth, while others were covered in spikes.

I was aware of the animals, creeping above our heads, watching our steps. Never once did I hear them, but I could somehow _feel_ their eyes on my skin.

Watching the forest go by as we walked on and on felt mesmerizing. Soon, by feet seemed to set in time with my pulse, beating like the thrum of a timpani. Scents of musk and pines whirled around my nose, calming me. I had never enjoyed walking on rotting leaves and dirt so much.

"We're almost here," Edward whispered hesitantly, not wanting to break the silence, which felt pure. "Can you see the light ahead? That tiny sliver?" He pointed ahead of us.

I scrunched my eyes tightly. In the distance, there was one long, golden ray of sunlight, pouring through the leaves.

I smiled widely. "I see it." We walked on towards it, but much faster this time.

Only moments later, I froze. It felt as if my mind was exploding - but pleasurably. Every nerve, every tissue was coming undone, bursting into billions of microscopic bits. My skin was alive with some unnamed force. It tingled like I had been touched with a feather. The world around me had frozen just as I did. The earth felt as if it was one with me, grumbling underneath my toes. Through all of it, there was a sense of victory, of passion. Like my body had been opened to welcome something new that I had waited for.

I fell to my knees, sobbing uncontrollably. I realized what I was welcoming back with a shock through my whole body.

"Bella!" Edward yelled in concern, sitting beside me and seizing my hand. "Bella, what? What happened?"

When I looked up, he saw that they were tears of untamed joy. Brilliant, explosive joy.

"I remembered, Edward!" I cried.

A smiled took over his lips. "You . . . You remembered?" He perked up in excitement.

"The meadow, Edward, the meadow. _Our_ meadow." I wrapped my arms tightly around his chest. He returned the embrace and kissed my forehead. He let out a strangled laugh, making me giggle along, though this seemed to be a strange time to do so.

"I can't believe it," I marveled. "I can remember something - and it's something important. I can remember when I . . . when I said I loved you for the first time."

It felt strange, watching myself over and over in my mind; but God, it felt so good. We both looked so young, so naïve, almost. I smiled at the nostalgic feeling. I had never experienced nostalgia before.

"Do you remember what I said to that?" he asked me. I noticed that his eyes were also wet with tears, just about to brim over. "Do you remember what I said?"

"You said, _I love you, too_."

We said the last part together. It was whispered in perfect clarity.

"Forever."

**Chapter End Notes:**

It's over. It's seriously, frickin' I MIGHT DO WHAT CHARLIE WAS THINKING LAST CHAPTER I REPEAT I MIGHT ( this idea was from **_godsgurl4146 _**) and do it as a one- shot YOU CAN HELP MAKE MY DECISION ON MY POLL THAT IS ON MY ACCOUNT THIS POLL WILL CLOSE ON APRIL 20, 2009


	27. note

Author's note ----okay I got 1 answer from my poll and it was yes so I'm doing Charlie's pov of 25  it might take a while because I have to do a book report. Also sorry if you thought this was a chapter even if the story is over.

~~~~~Maddie~~~~~ aka – 1o1-clothes-over-bros1o1


	28. sorry

I'm sooooooooo sorry I haven't write Charlie's prov. Of chapter 25 because I been busy sooo much and I can't write over the summer too because I'll be gone the hole time. So I'm** NOT** writing Charlie's prov. Once again I'm sooooo sorry. Please don't hate me.

Read, write watch one tree hill :)


	29. hey guys

**Hey guys. I know what you're thinking " how many author notes is she going to write?" but this note is just going to say that I have a half of my one-shot story up and I want to see what you think of it so far. Bad? Good? So please review and tell me. Also I might not update that one-shot soon because my cousins are coming soon and there staying at my house. So I have to clean my house. And my 2-year cell-phone contract is up so I have to buy a new phone so I'm going to get an IPHONE!!!!!! Also ( I say that too much) I computer is wacked up. The backlight doesn't work at all and so I'm connecting it to my TV and the picture is super blurry so sorry If I misspell a word. But the good news is that for x-mas I'm getting an apple laptop. So tell me if their good computers. Wow this is a long author's note. so all in all please check out my new one-shot called** **fire!**

**With love (not jk jk jk) maddie**


	30. sequel?

Should I do a sequel to this story? It would be about them going to college. This would be the summary would be like this:

The love of your life leaves you? You get in a car crash? Lose your memory? If that sounds like a fun four years of high school, just wait for college.

Should I write it? Review me or just answer on the poll


	31. sequel Decision

Ok everyone I WILL be doing a sequel!!!!!! But this summer I'm very busy. Next week I'll be going to Chicago!!! Hometown here I come!!! I'm taking photography classes all summer. Also I'm taking cooking classes. My friend from my old town is coming right after I come back from Chicago and my dad's birth-day is coming up so I'm very very busy. But I'll try to post chapter up every once in a while. Once again I'll WILL be doing a sequel!! I'll post the first chapter right after I post this. Also one my favorite t.v. series just finished called Harper's island. The ending was so …….I can't even explain it, but I was soo awesome.


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